Waste

I’m disappearing on the inside
A heavy heart filled with empty dreams
On the outside
The pain made visible, tangible
Internal suffering shines external for proof
Of the waste of occupied space in my mind
The waste of tissues and shot glasses
Of crying frenzied fits and sleepless nights
The waste of possibilities
Of love
You’re a waste of a person
But I’m wasting away for you
You see nothing in me, you’ll see nothing on me
I’ll shed myself, lifting the weight from my shoulders
To erase the burden, lighten the load
You won’t tie me down, you won’t tie me up
My stomach eats itself with the acidity of sour fantasies
Growling and grumbling, moaning with unsatisfaction
Crumbs are all you’ve given me
Mere pieces of promises scattered on the ground
Swept away by the wind
And carried to gingerbread houses and pots of gold
Nothing I can grasp with my fist
Nothing I can close my jaw around
Nothing I can swallow but the bitter dust of memories
Hollow concavity begets attention.
Plagued with gnawing cries of malnourished emotion,
It’s worth it if you look at me