1: Educating Kaylee Ch. 09

"Son, after what happened, don't forget that she is scared to death of losing you permanently and hasn't been acting like herself. She probably won't act like herself until she gets you back and sets things right, or simply finds a way to get over you."

With those words playing in his mind, Luke exhaled with relief, coming to the understanding that she was just as nervous as he was. Maybe more.

"You look good, Kaylee," Luke said quietly. "I've missed you."

Kaylee leaned in as if she wanted to throw her arms around Luke and hug him, but she stopped herself. "You look good too, Luke," she meekly smiled, crossing her arms and running her hands up and down her shoulders.

The two smiled in awkward silence until it occurred to Luke that the cold air outside must have been freezing to her, considering she wasn't wearing much. "Uh, do you want to wear my jacket Kaylee? You look like you're freezing," he told her, taking off his black leather jacket.

"No, that's ok. You don't hav..." she said even though Luke wasn't really waiting for her to answer; he already swung it over her shoulders. Kaylee beamed from ear to ear. Luke couldn't tell if her cheeks were red because she was blushing or if it was from the cold nip in the air. She snuggled into the jacket and quietly said, "Thanks, Luke. You always knew how to treat a girl."

As Luke straightened out the jacket around her shoulders, he noticed her nipples poking through the thin fabric of her tank top. His eyes widened slightly and bounced away from them, although he couldn't help steal another quick glance. Again his eyes bounced away, returned to them one more time, and finally looked away for good. He tried looking away as casually as possible, but a glance that obvious was impossible to recover from. He came across awkwardly, looking up towards the sky as if there was actually something interesting up there.

Kaylee giggled, barely able to believe what had just happened. "Why Luke, I do believe you've been looking at my breasts," she said in a pretend southern accent with her head cocked to the side. "I know you've done it before -- you're only male, after all, but I think this is actually the first time I've caught you."

It was his turn to wear the red hue on his face. He cast his eyes downward but gave her a crooked smile, "Yeah, I, uh..."

Luke shook his head and laughed.

"Audrey has seen you staring at my breasts before, but I've never actually managed to catch you. I must be getting better at this. Or else, you're losing your touch at being discreet."

He stammered, "Or maybe both."

"I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever you don't make eye contact with me, it means one of three things. Either you're mad at me and don't want to talk, you're extremely embarrassed, or you're feeling very guilty about something." Looking down at Luke's pants, Kaylee giggled, "and judging by that, I think we can eliminate anger and embarrassment."

Luke squirmed, but he still wore a smile on his bright red face.

An awkward silence returned, but he didn't feel as nervous as he originally did. Embarrassed, yes; but not nervous. He could tell by her eyes and seductive smile that she wasn't nervous either.

"So... um, how have you been," she asked him, breaking the silence. "How is Faith?"

"Uh, I've been good, thanks for asking. So has Faith. She's missed you a lot, you know."

With an inquisitive look, Kaylee confidently asked, "Just Faith has missed me?"

Luke reeled backwards, unsure how to answer her. "Uh, yeah. Well, Faith, my mom and dad..." he rambled.

She asked him, "So just your family missed me?"

He knew she wasn't going to let him off the hook. "I... of course I have, as well," he faltered. "I, you know... I've missed you," he squeaked out.

He mentally cursed. Right when he started to get comfortable with her, she caught him off guard again and found a way to push his buttons. She was doing it on purpose, too; he just knew it!

"Real convincing, cowboy," she said sarcastically, shaking her head with a faint smile.

He swallowed, confessing, "I've missed you, a lot. I mean it."

Kaylee's eyes sparkled.

"I really have, Kaylee," he said, swallowing hard.

And he meant it, but it was time to drop the bomb.

"But we need to talk."

Kaylee recoiled. Luke felt bad about how he said that; he meant to soften the blow but his words came out all wrong. Kaylee looked like she was in sheer terror.

He could tell that the waterworks were about to start, and he wasn't sure how to intervene and prevent that from happening.

"No, I... it's not like that. I've been thinking about a lot of things lately," he said, placing his hands on the leather jacket around her shoulders, holding her gently.

He continued, "My dad and I had a pretty deep talk a while ago, and it forced me to do some thinking. Well, it forced me to do some soul-searching, really. About us, about college, about my future. About what I want to do with my life. I have to do something meaningful, something that has purpose. Something that makes a difference."

Carefully thinking about what to say next, he looked up to the sky as he paused to think. All of her focus was on him; Kaylee stared at him with complete captivation, desperately waiting for him to explain.

"My mom's going to kill me, but I'm not going to college. Well, I will, but not immediately after high school."

Kaylee's jaw dropped. The revelation that Luke -- the smartest person she knew -- wasn't going to college, absolutely floored her. The look on her face was one of bewilderment.

He could tell she wanted to say something, but she couldn't seem to form the right words. He quickly continued, "I've been thinking about this for a while now. Something pretty serious. It's been in the back of my mind, especially since the car crash."

"Kaylee...," Luke told her firmly, holding on to her shoulders.

"I'm enlisting. I'm joining the military; the Air Force. I leave the day after graduation."

She would have hurt less if he had punched her in the face. Kaylee lost it; she was ready for the worst, but that... she just wasn't expecting that. Her legs buckled and Luke had to quickly move forward and catch her. As she threw her arms around his neck, his jacket slid off her shoulders, falling to the ground. Luke tried the best he could to comfort her but it wasn't enough.

"N-no..." she barely managed to squeak out, unable to say any other words. "No, no, no!"

Kaylee buried her head into his chest and sobbed. Within seconds, her tears drenched his shirt. She didn't say a word, and neither did Luke. All he could do was hold her tight and gently stroke her head. He never wanted to cause her pain, but he couldn't help it. Hurting her was inevitable. He could feel his own eyes misting up, not because he was sad to leave but because of the pain Kaylee felt.

"Kaylee, I really hope you understand how much you have affected my life, and all of it for the better. This year has been incredibly wonderful, and it's all because of you. You've taught me so much about life, and about people, and even instilled a sense of confidence in myself that I didn't know I had. You showed me that I'm more than just a braniac or a computer nerd, and that I'm actually capable of being... well, normal."

Kaylee sniffled, trying to hold back her tears, "Luke, you are beyond normal. You're loving, and wonderful, and compassionate, and to put up with me I think you have the patience of Job."

Her biblical reference brought a slight grin to Luke's face.

Still, Kaylee's voice strained as she added, "And I haven't even had a chance to show you that, and now I'm losing you forever?" Her voice squeaked, barely able to finish her sentence.

Luke held her even tighter, hugging her again.

Gently taking her by the shoulders, he looked at her and said, "That's why you have to understand how difficult this decision was for me. The Accident... when I saved that other guy. It stirred something inside me. It took me a while to see it, but I realized that my actions made a significant impact. And based on that, everything... became clear."

He looked into her teary eyes and said, "I now know what I want to do... what I need to do. Saving one person showed me that I can help protect all of us, and you gave me the confidence I need to follow through."

Kaylee buried her head in Luke's chest, her shoulders moving up and down, yet not a sound came out of her.

Luke tenderly said, "Do you remember that poem you had to read for English, 'To Lucasta, going to the Wars' by Richard Lovelace? It ends, 'I could not love thee, Dear, so much loved I not honour more.' That's how I feel. I love you, Kaylee, and I always will. But in my heart, I feel the calling to serve my country. Precisely because I love you."

Luke knew leaving was the right decision, but he was still angry with himself. He wanted nothing more than to make Kaylee's tears go away, and instead watch her flash him one of those breathtaking smiles that she always did. But that wasn't going to happen, and no matter what his heart wanted he couldn't do a single thing about it.

Much had occurred during his senior year, impacting him more than any other point in his lifetime. In particular, two very different but equally incredible circumstances interwove their way into his life despite minding his own business, yet they were both powerful enough to change the course of his future.

One: Kaylee came out of nowhere. Because of her, he went from being the biggest nerd in the history of Remmington High School to having the most beautiful cheerleader in the world falling into his arms. Sure, he was probably still a nerd, but by the grace of God she didn't seem to care.

And now, she was crying in his arms. Luke considered himself lucky for even having her in his life, and the thought of leaving her made him physically sick.

Two: Luke was in a tragic car accident that almost claimed his life not once, but twice. The first time was from the initial crash itself, and the second was risking his life trying to help the unconscious teenager in the burning vehicle.

He actually saved the life of another human being. Had he not taken the actions he did, the other guy would have certainly died. The feeling of making a difference... there wasn't anything in the world that could compare to that feeling.

There was a new world ahead of him, a country to serve, and people to help. He thought long and hard, and he prayed like crazy. In the end, there was no denying that the military was his calling. He even continued to pray despite the feeling in his heart, just in case he was wrong and he was really meant to be with Kaylee after all. If that was the case, there is no way he would pass that opportunity by.

How amazing would it have been to marry Kaylee, sweep her off her feet and carry her away to a small little house with green grass and a white picket fence while watching their twins play in the backyard? It would be easy enough to get a job with a software firm and rake in a six-digit figure by the time he was thirty.

But, it didn't look like it was part of God's plan at this point. Maybe His plan was simply to bring her into his life only temporarily, just long enough for her to foster his self-confidence and allow it to grow. Maybe there was nothing more she could do for him.

Or, worse yet, maybe there was nothing more he could do for her; as she struggled with math and chemistry, he patiently educated Kaylee, guiding her to pass every one of her senior classes. That might have been his only purpose for being in her life.

He sighed, hoping that wasn't the case.

Holding his cheek against Kaylee's, Luke wrapped his arms around her tighter, gently swaying with her, back and forth. She had done so much for him; she took him from being a loser to being halfway normal. No matter what, he prayed God would etch this moment permanently into his mind; he wanted to remember this moment forever. He had to remember this moment forever.

He was going to miss her like crazy.

This concludes Book One, thank you for reading. Book Two will be coming out in a few weeks to a month in order to continue the tale of our young protagonists, although the story itself will be vastly different from Book One so depending on your reading tastes, you may want to skip it altogether. Except for a few flashbacks, be warned that the high school phase is over.

A special thanks to Random Librarian, especially on this chapter; he had a big impact on the ending. The Richard Lovelace poem was all him, and his inputs in the final conversation between Luke and Kaylee were significant.

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!

See you for Book Two: The Diary of an Underdog - Beneath Orion, Worlds Apart.