A Difficult Childhood

Greg's family took total control of the wedding. The only guests were my parents, his brothers and their wives. There were no flowers, bridesmaids, or any of the stuff young girls dream about for their wedding. Like he said...A business deal.

As my belly grew, my love for my baby did too. I loved you more every day. Finally you were born and I got to hold my precious baby boy in my arms. Finally I could kiss you, smell that sweet baby smell and show you off to everybody who would look. I was even a little proud of myself for having made the right decision. I wrote letters and sent pictures to my parents, bragging proudly on my little Scotty.

While I was totally occupied with my baby, I really had no idea what Greg was doing and I didn't really care. He was gone most of the time and that suited me just fine. I was the happy homemaker taking care of my little Scotty.

Oh, but you were such a wonderful little guy. I remember your first day of school. You didn't want me to leave when I tried to drop you off. You didn't cry, but I could tell you didn't like it, but next day you couldn't wait to get there, excited to see the other kids and your teacher again.

Your first teacher... A beautiful girl about the same age as me with flaming red hair that she wore loose almost to her waist and she had the brightest green eyes I'd ever seen. Her name was Jennie.

Everything was sailing along just fine. I was lonely most of the time. I wouldn't invite people over because I never knew when Greg might come home. Sometimes he would be gone just a few days, and other times it could be weeks, even a month or more a few times.

Greg was tolerable when he was sober, but when he drank he'd get mean and ornery. When you were ten years old Greg started staying home a little more and drinking more. I asked him once if he would slow it down and not drink so much around you. He grabbed my arm and shouted "Who gives a damn about your little bastard kid? That's what the world really needs, another bastard kid." Then he shoved me across the living room and luckily I landed on the couch, but it scared me. He'd never been so rough with me before and I couldn't trust him after that. I was afraid he might hurt you, so I tried never to ruffle his feathers from that day on.

Then one day I was headed out to do some grocery shopping. Greg was home. I was going to take you with me, but as we started out the door Greg asked, "Why do you have to drag the kid along? Leave him here, I won't bite him."

"I don't know Greg, if you decide to go somewhere, you won't have to worry about leaving him alone.

'I'm NOT going anywhere." he said, his voice starting to rise. Now get on out of here and hurry back. I'm out of beer and I'd like to have a few this afternoon.'

Not wanting to start an argument I said. 'Well, OK. I'll be back as soon as I can.'

I waved bye to you and headed out. I did the shopping as fast as I could so I could hurry back to you, but when I got home his car was gone. I rushed into the house and searched every room. I was scared out of my mind. You weren't here.

I had no idea where he might have gone, so I had no choice except to wait in hopes that he'd bring you back soon. After about two hours which seemed more like two days, the phone rang. It was the police. Greg had had an accident they said. You and Greg were in the hospital. I asked if you were all right. They wouldn't tell me, said I'd have to go to the hospital to check on you.

I threw down the phone and raced to the car. I had to really concentrate so as not to go too fast and have an accident myself.

They wouldn't let me see you when I got there and kept trying to reassure me that you were OK. I didn't believe them. If you were OK, then why wouldn't they let me see you? I kept yelling and trying to find where you were till they gave me some kind of pill and told me it would help calm me down; It did. I went out like a light only to wake up hours later on a cot in the nurse's break room. I found my way back to the nurse's station and started asking about you again. Finally one of the nurses gently took my hand and said, "Come with me." I went. She led me to a room where I finally got to see you. You were sleeping peacefully enough it seemed, but both your legs were in casts from your hips to your toes.

The nurse came back, I have no idea how long it was, but it wasn't long enough. She told me I should go home and try to get some rest. She said you were in good hands and that you'd be sleeping for quite a while.

As she led me from your room, I asked if she knew where my husband was. She said she'd find out for me right away. She did. He had been treated for minor scrapes and bruises and released. When I got home I found a strange car in the drive, and the son of a bitch was passed out on the couch with a liquor bottle.

They kept you in those casts for six months after they finally let me bring you home. Then there were all the therapy sessions, I wanted so desperately for your legs to heal properly, we never missed even one. My heart would break every time I bathed you, but it was even worse when you'd look at me as if you didn't know me and wouldn't answer when I called your name.

The truck driver said the brakes failed when he saw a car creeping through the intersection and he tried to stop, but he also claimed that the light was green for him. Several other witnesses said the light was green for Greg, but they all agreed that if Greg hadn't been nearly stopped in the middle of the intersection the truck would have missed him entirely.

The insurance company for the trucking company offered us fifteen thousand dollars to settle our claim without going to court. That wouldn't even cover the hospital and doctor bills. I asked Greg what he thought. He said he didn't give a damn as long as he got paid for his car being totaled.

I had nowhere to turn, no experience with this sort of stuff, but I knew that it just wasn't right for them to pay so little. Then I remembered a lady I had met In the park where I used to take you to play. I couldn't remember the name of the lawyer she'd mentioned, but figured I would if I saw it because it rhymed with a famous TV lawyer's name. I started looking through the phone book. Wow! I never thought there would be so many lawyers listed. There it was! Cayson. I grabbed the phone and made an appointment.

Mr Cayson agreed with me and took on the case for a one dollar retainer, balance to be paid if and when we won. He said he thought we should sue for at least three million.

Greg called me crazy, said we should settle for what they offered.

We eventually won even more than we'd hoped for. The money was put into a trust to be held till your twenty first birthday with a portion of the interest paid to the head of the household to take care of your medical and other needs. Greg has had control over that till now.

Well son, that's my story. I don't think I did anything wrong. The only thing I feel ashamed about is keeping the truth from you. But I feel better about it now that I've told you everything. I hope you aren't upset with me."

"How could I be upset with you Mom?" I asked, "You've always been my best friend. Nothing can ever change that."

And nothing ever will!