Autumn Winds

Helen Brown was 54 years old, stood five feet six inches tall, weighted 121 pound, had graying black hair and steel grey eyes. While she could be as hard as nails when needs warranted, she was a person deeply interested in other people’s welfare and in helping them to resolve their problems. She had worked for McMillan and Sons for close to 26 years, and the news about Frank had shocked her. She considered Frank to be a friend as well as a coworker. Over the years, there had been many times when she and her husband had had dinner with Frank and his wife. She thought that if anyone in the world had a solid marriage, it had to be Frank and Martha, and now that illusion had blown up in her face.

“Frank!” she called as she saw him leaving the building, but he didn’t seem to hear her. She broke into a run and dashed out of the door after him. “Frank! Frank Howard, don’t you dare just walk away from me!”

“What?” Frank said, as he turned at the sound of his name, “Oh, it’s you Helen.”

“That’s all you can say—oh, it’s you Helen? I was beginning to think that you were going to get away from me.”

“I sort of wanted to get away quietly.”

“Well, you weren’t able to that were you?”

“No,” he conceded, “with all the yelling, it was anything but quiet. Helen, I really have to be going. I guess Carl put you on my trail, but there isn’t anything you can say or do that is going to change my mind.”

“Change your mind?” she looked at him in mock surprise. “That is the last thing on my mind, but we can at least have a drink together before you have to go, can’t we? I mean, I sort of thought we were friends. We at least should have one from the road. Come on, I’ll even buy.”

“Alright, but it won’t do you a bit of good,” he smiled, “I won’t change my mind.”

They walked into a small bar and grill, located not far from where Frank had parked his car. It was still before noon, and the rush hadn’t yet started, so they had no problem finding a table. Sitting down, they gave their order to the waitress. Frank sat back and slumped in his chair.

“You look beat,” Helen stated the obvious. “Care to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

“Carl said you caught someone with your wife.”

“Carl talks too much. Let’s just say that my marriage came to a sudden, if not overdue end.”

“Do you have any idea how long she has been having an affair,” Helen sympathetically asked.

“From what I could determine,” Frank grimly said, “today was the only time.”

“One time?” gasped Helen in amazement. “You’re willing to throw away all those years you two were married, because of one time?”

“It goes a lot deeper than what happened today. My marriage has been free fall for several years; it just impacted the ground today. What happened this morning just speeded up something, which would have happened sooner or later. I think it maybe best that it turned out to be sooner.”

“I can understand how you feel,” she told him. “You are hurt, but don’t let that hurt wreak the rest of your life, and everything that you’ve worked to accomplish, with your career.”

“You don’t even come close to understanding how I feel.”

“What do you know?” Helen’s voice had a keen edge of restrained anger to it. “Do you think you have a monopoly on having an adulterous spouse? Jim has been cheating on me for almost five years, and not with just one person.”

“Are you serious? You’re not just saying that, as some sort of ploy, to get me to come back to my job, are you?”

“Frank Howard,” her voice rose in wrath, “is that all the better you know me, after all the years that we have worked together?”

“Okay,” Frank quickly said, “I’m sorry. I’ve sort of had a bad morning. I had no clue about Jim.”

“No course not, because I haven’t let it drive me away. I hate what he has done, almost as much as I hate him; but, I love the things that I have and the lifestyle I enjoy. For awhile, I thought about having an affair myself, but then I realized that would only cheapen me and lower me to Jim’s level. So, I’ve stayed in a loveless marriage and made the best of things. I’m too close to retirement to go and throw away everything because of his infidelities. So much for my sad story, now tell me where are you heading and what your plans are.”

“I’m not sure where I’m going,” he admitted, “but it is going to be a long way from here. As for what my plans are, that’s a long story.”

“Good,” she smiled, “I don’t have anything pressing, go ahead and tell me.”

“Okay, but the quick version, I’m in a hurry,” he paused for a few seconds, as the waitress brought the drinks, and then resumed talking. “You see, I went to school out in Berkley, California back in the late sixties and early seventies.”

“No! I never knew that!” she laughed. “I was at school over across the bay, at San Francisco, around that same time.”

“Anyhow, I guess I was your quintessential liberal, complete with long hair, beard, and full of idealism. I was involved in all sorts of things, from trying to end the war, to starting up food and medical programs for the poor. I thought I could do something to save the world.”

“Wow, that is another thing I never knew about you!” she interrupted him again. “I was a dreamer too, back in those days. Like you, I thought that I could make a difference. I started a rescue project for runaway girls, keeping them out of the hands of pimps and pushers. I’d like to think I did some good. It is totally amazing that, for all the years we’ve worked together, we have had so much in common and but never knew it.”

“I never wanted to talk much about those times,” said Frank. “The past is gone, besides having a former hippy as an employee isn’t something most companies want to know about. Anyhow, after I graduated I continued trying to save the world, but when I met and married Martha, I sold out. I left everything that I had helped to build up and came back here to get a job. So, why did you leave your rescue project?”

“It is very personal,” she looked down into her drink in silence for a moment, before looking into Frank’s eyes. “I was in love with someone that worked with me. I thought he was the sun, the moon, and all the stars, and for several years everything went great. Then, he began to change. He became involved with hard drugs, and I caught him attacking one of the runaways. Thank God, I stopped him in time! I had him arrested. I had found out he had other arrests for assaulting women. He ended up going to prison. I realized that I had made a terrible mistake, by not making a full background check on him, and because of my error, a girl was almost raped. I had almost caused, what I had been trying to prevent. I quit, came east, fell in love with Jim and got married. Sometimes though, I wish I had stayed with it, but I didn’t. Instead, I grew up and joined the system. It’s not selling out to grow up and take on responsibility. You did it, I did it, and all reasonable people do it.”

“So, tell me,” she smiled sympathetically at him, “where are you going? What are your plans?

“Well, I’ll tell you, but you’re going to think I’m crazy. The world is fucked up worse now than it was when we were kids,” Frank shook his head, “and I’m going out to save it.”

“Frank, that’s impossible!” she said sharply. “No man can save the world.”

“No one ever will, if that is how everyone feels,” he smiled grimly. “I’m getting older, but I’ve got enough time and strength left, to make one last crusade—I’m going to give it a try. This isn’t some midlife crisis, where I’m hoping to recapture my youth. I have always regretted walking away from helping the poor. I walked away, because I loved Martha, and I wanted the best for her. I won’t say that I haven’t enjoyed my job, because I have; however, there are other things, more worthwhile to do in this world. Maybe I can’t change much in the world, but just maybe, I can do some good before I cash in my chips. I don’t know if I can make the least bit of difference, but I do know I have to give it a try.”

“What about everything that you have here? Are you just going to walk away from that?”

“I’m not walking away empty handed. I made two stops before I came back to the office this morning. I cleaned out most of the checking account, and a major saving account. So, I’m coming away with a little over ninety thousand dollars. That will hold me for a bit.”

“But what about your house, your investments, your other properties—are you just going to leave all that?”

“Martha is welcome to it all,” he sighed, “those are just material things. I think, I got caught up too much with material things, and I forgot the things that are really important in life. I don’t hate Martha, and I don’t want to punish her. I wish her well, but it is time to do, what I’ve been wanting to do for a long time, but didn’t have the courage to undertake. Okay, so call me a foolish aging man, but I’m going.”

“I don’t call you foolish,” Helen sadly shook her head. “I think you are a very hurt man, but I’m not going to try and talk you out of it. Now, that you’ve explained it, I can see where you’re coming from, and I have to admire you for it. I really think that you should stay right here and see everything resolved before going.”

“I don’t think so,” he said finishing the last of his drink and shaking his head. “The time to act is now.”

“I’ve been thinking, and you know something that really has me upset?” Helen gave a humorless laugh. “You were able to make two stops and come up with over ninety thousand dollars. Most of our money is tied up in real estate I don’t think that I could pull together more than fifty thousand, and it would take me three stops to do that. It must be great to have mad money.”

“I’ve got to run to the men’s room and then I’ve got to be going. You take care and it has been a pleasure working with you.”

“Hold everything! Don’t you run off to the men’s room and expect me to vanish. I’ll walk you to your car. Deal?”

“Yeah, okay,” he smiled at her as he stood up, “only you had better walk fast.”

She watched him leave the room and sat deep in thought. She wished that she had more time to work everything out. Frank was forcing the issue. She weighed all the options, but her mind wavered on a course of action.

“Damn, that fool!” she thought, “We are so alike. Only fools follow their dreams. There he goes like Don Quixote, but without his Sancho Panza. He is going to fall right on his nose, and there won’t be anyone around to pick him up. Fool! Damn fool! This is ridiculous, there are no choices left.”

She reached into her purse, pulled out her cell phone and called Carl Coffman’s number. Carl wasn’t going to like the news she had to tell him, he wasn’t going to like it one bit. She had just finished talking to Carl, when she saw Frank coming back.

“There is only one thing I want to know, Frank,” she said as she stood up and grabbed him by the arm, as if she was afraid he might run away.

“And what is that?”

“Can we stop at three banks and my house on the way out of town? I just quit. Don’t stand there with your mouth open like that—times wasting; there’s many miles to go before we sleep.”

Two people stepped out into the autumn wind on their way to save the world.