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Heather, My Best Friend Ch. 02

This isn't quite the follow-up to an incest story I wrote six years ago. So if you've read the first part, you'll probably be disappointed that an essay on fantasy is in place of the conclusion to a brother/sister story. The e-mail I used doesn't exist anymore, so if you're pissed I won't ever know. Also, if you're irriated with the idea of this text why not stop reading? Again, this isn't something you can wank to.

I think I was in high school when I wrote the story. The grammar is a mess, my grammar is still a mess. I'm just intrigued that so many people seemed to have actually read it and voted for it(just short of the H mark.) I was out one night with a girl named Heather, this blonde doll of a female, I went home and wrote a sex story about her.

Why did I make my friend my sister/lover? I think that's probably why incest stories are so popular. A family member is as solid a human relationship as you can find. Heather was my friend, someone I desired. In the fantasy she's my sister and she wants me the same as I want her. I know we make some subjects of our desire into the sorts of relationships that can't slip away. Hence, the popularity of the incest story(even the ones with ill grammar.)

From a subjective space, I'd say most people who read incest stories aren't interested in having sexual relationships with their own family(maybe a cousin here or there.) So where does the heart of the fantasy lie? If we're not imagining lying with our own sister, what's going on? People reading the Loving Wives/Cheating portion of this site are likely imagining their companions receiving pleasure from someone else.

I'd guess the incest fantasy finds itself in the desire to be in an intimate, monogamous relationship. The secrecy involved in hiding a sexual relationship with a sibling from a parent is just another layer of intimacy. The fear of being discovered is part of any intimate relationship. The incestuous couple is automatically more intimate than the non-related couple, and therefore more attractive a fantasy.

I'm not interested in the taboo arousal of incestuous elements in fiction/non-fiction. Daddy/Daughter and Mother/Son fantasies are arousing in terms of the relations of power. Someone who was submissive takes the dominant role and vice versa. There are stories that mirror that sort of uber intimacy of the sibling sexual union, but for the most part the older/younger form is erotic in its amplification and play with the age/gender/familial power structure. Uncles and aunts are just second order in comparison to the closeness of parents and children, similar to the intimacy of cousin love vs. brother love.

Is it strange that I find a thread to monogamy from sibling sex? What does 'monogamy' mean in broad terms? One lifetime love? Who do you love for a lifetime? Your sisters and brothers, parents, maybe some friends. But most people don't meet their future spouse in toddlerhood.

But I don't love my sister or desire her like I do my wife(actually, I don't like either of my sisters.) So why would I make a girl I desired into my sister? I'm saying, it's because no matter how much I dislike my sisters, I can't get rid of them and they can't get rid of me. It's a kind of union that is everlasting.

We pay lip service to everlasting love when we get married. But we can't actually commit to the idea of loving someone who might just leave us for someone else or get middle-aged and boring--that is until we're old and saggy and close to death. When we're not desirable to anyone else we can usually find it within our means to recognize the other as part of us.

Siblings don't have to spend a lifetime with the fear of separating. The other can't go on about their business as if their brother or sister never existed. When we get married our intention is to become the center of intimacy for the other, the center of secrecy that might have once been between mother and toddler, juvenile siblings, pubescent friends etc.

In an incest story the intention might initially be the pleasure of sex, but then the narrator comes along and worries about societal rules and familial regulations. If the narrator didn't worry about such things the story wouldn't be an incest story. Once fear of the relationship being revealed is in place, the siblings have to either choose monogamy(return to an intimacy they haven't had since childhood) or return to their adult non-sexual relationship.

I'm sure I put my own Heather in as my sister because of my inability to connect with her at the time. If she were my sister she'd already be connected to me, and then the faulty logic might read: I've a better chance at sleeping with her? I'm not sure, the erotic was in becoming intimate with her past friendship, with the possibility of lasting physical intimacy.

The second part of the story would have to challenge that new found uber intimacy(someone finds out) then either the relationship explodes back into adult non-sexual siblinghood or the pair accepts the inevitable, everlasting nature, and the challenge of absolute intimacy/secrecy.

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