Humiliation

I had a problem. Just a few years ago this problem never could have arisen. The problem was that I get very excited when I suck another man's dick, but I look and usually act like an alpha male. I was attracting a bunch of submissive cocksuckers when I desperately wanted to be someone's bitch.

In my everyday life, I am a masculine, fit, hairy guy married to an attractive, sexy woman. I have a very thick eight and a half inch cock that gay and bi men(most women) seem to love. We have two great kids. I am extremely aggressive and successful in business. However, a few years ago, I learned that I absolutely love to suck cock. It makes me feel like a girl and for some reason that feeling makes my dick hard. I have learned that I absolutely love the taboo, nasty feeling I get when I am on the wrong end of a penis. I am totally embarrassed and humiliated by my cocksucking, but I can't stop. I often get so excited when I am sucking a dick that I cum without anyone touching my cock. I don't completely understand it, but I completely love to have a dick in my mouth. I also love sperm in my mouth and down my throat.

I started my life as a secret bisexual by posting Craigslist ads while on business trips back before Craigslist dropped its personal ads. I loved it, but I ran into a guy who tried unsuccessfully to blackmail me and various Craigslist flakes. I started looking for some other way to have gay fun. The answer for me at least was an adult theater.

I read on the internet about various adult businesses in town and learned about an adult theater. It was different from the other adult video places and was supposed to be the cleanest and nicest adult place in town. Instead of booths or glory holes, this was a relatively nice, big theater with stadium seating and a big screen. They played straight porno movies so married guys could hide that they were interested in gay sex if they got caught going into the place. However, the men who went to the theater were interested in watching or participating in gay sex. The sex happened in the rows of the theater and everyone in the place could watch. I must have an exhibitionist streak because the idea of people watching me suck a dick made my dick very hard.

Because my wife doesn't know that I suck dicks and would divorce me if she found out, I had to be careful when satisfying my desire for hard cocks. I naturally was worried about the police vice squad raiding the place and arresting everyone who had their dick out or was having gay sex. I decided that the safest time for me to go to the adult theater was early in the morning on a weekend. Fewer people would be there and I couldn't imagine the vice squad raiding a place at 7:00 am. The theater was open 23 hours a day. It was closed for an hour between 6 and 7 am to clean the place and scrub it down thoroughly. I decided to go at a little after 7:00 on a Saturday morning. This worked because my wife slept in on most weekends and I usually worked out early in the morning, so nobody was alarmed by my absence. Also, my dick is always hard first thing in the morning.

The first few times I went to the theater, I was so nervous and embarrassed to be seen at such a place, I could barely stand it. I almost ran from the parking lot to the door of the theater so that nobody would see me. I must have looked like a complete novice because the man behind the desk said to me when I bought a ticket, "Do you understand that this is an open theater and that there are no booths or private places back there?" I blushed and said, "Yes." I felt like he knew I was an inexperienced cocksucker. I was not used to talking to someone who knew that I wanted to have sex with men.

The guy behind the desk struck me as a bright guy who was probably the manager of the theater. He was 30 or 35 years old, clean cut and pleasant. I was expecting a sleazy looking young guy. He was working the morning shift every time I went to the theater in the early morning hours. My dick got hard every time I went into the theater. I felt like I was saying to the manager and everyone in the theater, "Look at me. I am a faggot."

I had some great experiences in the theater. Some of the hottest sex of my life happened on the back few rows of the theater. Usually, an audience was watching. I loved to be on my knees with a hard cock in my mouth. I felt feminine and nasty when I was going down on a guy in the theater. However, the experiences were inconsistent.

The problems arose from the way in which guys hooked up in the theater. Guys would be seated all over the theater with most guys in the last few rows. At first at least, guys were all seated alone. Everyone would be cautious at first or when someone new walked in. Everyone was afraid of the vice squad or the management of the theater. Signs were posted outside of the theater entrance prohibiting any type of public exposure or lewd behavior. The signs were bullshit, but you never knew if the management might need to show the police that they were running a legitimate business by enforcing the rules.

When the guys in the theater became comfortable that none of the customers were from the police, they would pull out their dicks and begin to jack-off and look at the other guys in the theater. I liked this "mating" dance. I was always a little more careful than most guys, but eventually I would pull out my dick, too. That is where my trouble began. I have a big , thick cut cock. I am proud of it and it was fun to show it off at the theater. However, as soon as my hard cock came out of the running shorts I usually wore, guys would swarm around to touch it or suck it. I almost always had guys sitting in the seats next to me. This was a real give-away when someone new walked in the theater to see me sitting with one or two guys in the seats right next to me. I felt like I might as well hold up a sign saying, "I am a faggot!"

You might wonder how it was a problem for me that guys wanted to play with my dick and suck it. Most everyone loves a blowjob and most of the time I would eventually cum in the mouth of one of the guys sucking my dick. However, it was unsatisfying for me because I had figured out that I was an oral bottom. I dreamed about being on my knees with a hard cock down my throat while the guy called me a faggot or a cocksucker. I was almost obsessed with the thought of being a bitch for another man. Being a top just wasn't as much fun. Truthfully, I would rather have a woman suck my dick.

You might say, "Why not just tell the guys who wanted to suck your dick that you are not interested?" I obviously had that thought, but the guys in the theater were mostly married guys like me and I hated to reject them. I didn't want to hurt the feelings of these guys. I knew I didn't want to be rejected and I just could not bring myself to do it very often unless I just couldn't stand the looks of the guy.

So, I was looking for a way to let everyone in the theater know that I was a submissive cocksucker. I thought about wearing some very short pink running shorts that I had from years ago. However, I wasn't sure it would work and I knew my wife would make fun of me if she saw me in those old shorts. I also thought about wearing a pair of my wife's panties, but I didn't think it would work because it would be hard to see the panties in the theater rows unless I completely removed my shorts and stood up. Removing my shorts completely seemed too risky in a public place because I would not be able to pull them on quickly if a new person came into the theater.

I thought about this for a while and then came up with an idea while looking at some bisexual porn. I saw a sissy husband wearing a pink dog collar while sucking a dick. I would have to hide the collar from my wife, but I thought the submissive collar might be the answer. I looked forward to my next trip to the theater because in the lobby of the theater, they had lots and lots of sex toys and paraphernalia. I figure they would have collars, but I still was not sure it would work.

On the next Saturday morning, I went to the theater. I walked in and saw the manager was working like he usually was. He started to ring up my ticket to the movie, when I told him I needed his help. He seemed anxious to help. I was embarrassed to be shopping for a pink submissive collar and I started to blush at the thought of why I needed it. However, I managed to say, "Do you have any collars for humans?"

"Yes, I think so. Do you have any certain kind in mind?"

I blushed again and said, "I am looking for a pink collar."

He came around the counter and said, "I am Matt. I will show you what we have."

I shook his hand, told him my name was Joe and followed him down the aisle filled with dildos and dirty movies. As we arrived at the wall with various collars hanging on the wall, Matt said, " Is this for your wife or girlfriend?"

I knew I could lie to him and say "Yes," but I planned to put it on and enter the theater. So, I blushed and stammered a little and said, "No, it is for me to wear in the theater."

He raised his eyebrows a little and said that with most of the collars one size fits all. I looked at the collars and wanted a pink one that said, "SLUT" in large metal letters on the front. It also had a metal ring to attach a leash or a chain. I thought about whether I could stand the embarrassment of buying this slut collar, but decided that it didn't matter at this point since Matt now knew I wanted people in the theater to know that I was submissive or a slut or both.

Since the cat was out of the bag anyway, I asked Matt the question that was troubling me. I said, "Please just tell me if this question is inappropriate to ask an employee of the theater, but do you think that if I wear this pink collar, guys in the theater will know that I will go down on them?"

Matt laughed and replied, "I don't know about everyone in the theater, but I would sure know it."

I told him I would take the collar. As we walked back to the counter, I asked Matt another question I had wondered about when I was the first guy to arrive at the theater on weekend mornings. "Do any of the guys try to proposition you?"

He laughed again and said, "Sure."

I looked him in the eye and said, "Why don't I crawl behind this counter and do you right now?"

"What do you have in mind?"

I stammered and my dick got hard as I said, "I want to suck your cock."

He said, "That sounds like fun, but I can't do it until I get off of work at noon. If you can be here then, I will go watch a movie with you and you can suck my cock, princess."

I felt myself blush again and replied, "I will see you then, Matt."

I made up some errands that I needed to run and went back to the theater with my cock about to split my pants. As I entered the theater, I had on some thin work-out shorts with no underwear underneath. I also was wearing my new pink slut collar. And, for the first time in my life, I applied a coat of lip gloss to my lips. I found the light pink lip gloss in my wife's make-up drawer.

As I walked in, I was nervous because a lot more people were here than when I usually came to the theater. A man and a woman were buying something at the counter. Another man was looking around the store.

Matt looked at me and said to me, "You look good in your new collar, princess."

I was embarrassed especially in front of a woman. However, I managed to stammer out a thank you.

Then, Matt looked at me more carefully and said, "Are you wearing lipstick, Joey?"

The woman at the counter started laughing and I wanted to die. However, I couldn't think of anything to say other than, "No, it is lip gloss."

After the couple finished their transaction and left the store, Matt told me to go into the theater and to sit in the middle of the theater so I could put on a show for the other customers. That scared me a little since I knew from the cars in the parking lot that a lot of customers were in the theater. I could tell Matt was looking forward to this.

Before I went into the theater, I whispered to Matt, "You can call me dirty names if you like. I won't mind."

In fact, being called dirty names with a dick in my mouth is one of my favorite things to do. I took a seat in the middle of the theater and the middle of the row. I was in front of 20 or 25 guys who were sitting mostly in the back two or three rows. I didn't recognize any of the guys in the theater since I usually only came in the early morning hours. However, with so many guys there, I worried that someone I knew might be there.

After about ten minutes, Matt walked in and sat next to me. My cock was making a big tent in my shorts. "Looks like you are glad to see me, slut."

Most guys at the theater were a little tentative at first. Even the dominant tops. Matt was clearly not worried about anything. He said to me in a fairly loud voice, "Take you shorts off, bitch."

I figured he knew we were safe from the police. So, I stood up and removed my shorts. My hard cock bobbed and flopped around in front of me and the entire theater.

Matt said, "You have a nice dick for a sissy cocksucker."

He then told me loudly to remove my shirt, too. I had never seen anyone in the theater completely naked, but now I was naked in public except for my running shoes and socks. I wanted to tell him not to speak so loudly, but I didn't want to make him mad. So, I just did what he told me to do.

Then, he ordered me to get on my knees and remove his slacks. I got on my knees and noticed all of the guys watching us as I did. I undid Matt's belt and tried to open his pants and pull out his cock. It was hard because Matt did not help me. However, I anxiously worked on his pants and underwear until I managed to get his thick cock out of his pants.

Matt's cock was terrific. It was 6 or 7 inches long. What I really liked was that his cock was very thick. It was almost fat it was so big around. I rubbed his cock for a minute and then began to hungrily lick his balls. Matt moaned.

After I licked Matt's balls for a few minutes, he pulled on my head and indicated he wanted me to come up from the floor. I came back to my seat as Matt put his arm around me and pulled me toward him. He kissed me passionately. I had never been kissed by a man and thought that I had no desire to ever kiss a guy. However, I was wrong. As Matt kissed me, he stuck his tongue deep into my mouth and I simply melted. I have never felt more intimate with a person. I felt like I wanted to be his girlfriend.

After a few minutes of making out, Matt stood up in the aisle and gently pushed me to my knees in front of him. His very hard, big fat cock was staring me in the face. As I slipped to the floor, I saw that every guy in the theater was watching us. I passionately started sucking Matt's big penis. I loved the feeling of his fat cock in my mouth. I also loved the fact that a bunch of horny guys were watching me suck a dick in public.

Matt pushed my head. I swallowed more of his cock. Luckily, I had discovered that I usually do not have much of a gag reflex. I started to bob my head up and down on his hard cock. He moaned and groaned as I sucked.

Then, in a fairly loud voice so that everyone in the theater could hear, Matt said, "Suck my cock, faggot!"

I sucked faster and deeper to show him I loved to be called a faggot. He then said, "You are a good cocksucker, princess."

After a few minutes of sucking, Matt loudly said, "Tell me you love my cock, faggot."

I pulled back off of his fat cock and quietly said, "I love your cock, Matt."

"Louder, cocksucker!"

I quickly said in a loud voice, "I love your cock!"

As soon as my lips wrapped around his penis again, I came on the floor. I tried to hold off but I couldn't do it. I came and came and came. Matt smiled when he realized he made me cum without touching my dick.

"Tell me you are a nasty cocksucker."

"I am a nasty cocksucker."

"Tell me with my dick in your mouth."

I mumbled something with the big dick in my mouth which roughly sounded like "I am a nasty cocksucker."

I felt like a total slut. I felt like a submissive little girl as I served Matt with a crowd watching.

Matt started pumping my face faster and faster. I thought I was going to gag as he drove his dick deeper into my mouth, but I held on. Soon, with no warning, he exploded in my mouth and down my throat. His cock was in my mouth so deep, I could barely taste his sperm.

As I was catching my breath, Matt buttoned up his pants and said, "Thanks, faggot. See ya next time."

I started to get up and put on my shorts when I noticed that 3 or 4 guys were now gathered around me clearly wanting a blowjob. I straightened my new pink collar and went back to my knees.