Michelle's Diary:...

He smiled. "Michelle we can't make love if we're not IN love. But we can fuck if you want to."

"Whatever." I said and closed my eyes and waited for him to take my virginity. I felt his weight shifting on the bed as he leaned up over me. I winced a bit, expecting him to force that big penis into me at any moment, but he didn't. He kissed me on the neck. Well, he didn't really kiss me, he sort of nibbled me moving his teeth and lips up and down my neck from behind my ear to my shoulder. I REALLY liked it, even more than his caresses. It felt so erotic and so sensual... even more than kissing on the lips. I kept my eyes closed, but I loosened up considerably. I rolled my head to one side to give him better access, and I even gasped a little bit.

I guess he was encouraged, because one hand moved to my naked hip, and slid up my ribs to my breast. He took the whole thing in his hand and squeezed and fondled it. He rolled my nipple around in the palm of his hand while he continued to nibble my neck. I'd never had my breast massaged like that! It was incredible!

His mouth moved down my shoulder across my chest to my other breast. As he fondled one, he licked and kissed the other. I opened my eyes and looked down to see him licking my nipple, his tongue flicking across it rapidly. By this time I was really getting excited. I could feel my vagina getting wetter and opening up. I could feel the heat of his body so close to mine. I was so excited my heart was pounding in my chest as he suckled my nipple. "Do me Dave." I pleaded. "Please, I want it now."

He smiled and climbed off of me and off the bed. I sat up on my elbows to watch him pull a condom from his bag. His penis was standing out from his body hard and firm, and it bobbed when he walked. My heart was still racing as I watched him roll the blue latex sheath down the length of his penis. He came back and climbed back on top me. I spread my legs apart even further, and closed my eyes as I felt the head of his penis pressing against me.

"This may hurt a little." he said working the head inside my vagina. "You sure you're ready?" I kept my eyes closed and nodded vigorously. I didn't want to be a virgin anymore. He began to press forward into me. I felt my body stretching to accommodate him... then I felt it stop. He kept pressing forward and then suddenly there was a sharp pain between my legs, like when you pull out a hang nail. I tried not to cry out, but it really did hurt.

"Are you all right? Do you want me to keep going?" he asked. I bit my lip and nodded again. He pulled his penis out and slowly worked it in again. This time my body kept stretching for him and he pushed farther before withdrawing. The pressure of his penis inside of me felt nice. It eased the pain, kind of like when you hold a bruise, and as he worked his way in and out I found myself longing for him to go deeper and stay in longer. I didn't want him to pull back out.

Then it occurred to me, I was fucking!

The thought snapped my eyes open. He was looking down at me and smiling. "Hi," he panted.

"Hi." I said back. I tried to look down at myself to see what was happening, what it looked like down there.

"Do you just want to lie there while I do all the work?" Dave asked. "'Cause that's Ok if you do."

I hadn't realized I should be doing anything. I was a little embarrassed. He told me to wrap my legs around him and hold his butt or his shoulders so that I could pull myself into him while he pushed forward.

Oh it was wonderful! Suddenly I could control how deep and how fast he went! I held him inside of me and rocked my hips back and forth so that my clitoris was brushing against his penis. That felt so incredible! The pressure of his penis deep inside of me while my clitoris was being rubbed that way, and his naked chest pressed against my breasts. I couldn't stand it. Soon I was panting from the exertion too, and with each thrust I would gasp and moan. It felt so nice!

I tried to tell him how wonderful it was, but I couldn't seem to get the words out. "Oh Dave! Oh God Dave... It's so good... I didn't know... I didn't know it would be like this. Oh Dave... Oh yess!"

He smiled and told me how hot I was and how tight and wet my pussy felt. I looked down to see us again, but our bodies were pressed too tightly together.

"Oh Dave, I want to see it... I want to see you inside of me. I want to see you fucking me!" I moaned.

He stopped moving and pulled out of me. For a second I was worried that I had upset when I used the "F" word, but then he said, "Ok, why don't you get on top." He rolled over and laid down on his back, his blue clad penis leaning towards his belly. I straddled his hips on my knees, and he held his penis straight up as he explained to me how to ease myself down on to it.

By this time, we were both sweating, and my hair was a mess. I pushed the wet strands back out of my face as I slowly impaled myself on his penis. It filled me up completely and I sank all the way down until my pubic hair was touching his. I watched this in amazement, and then straightened my legs and lifted myself off of him again. I moved up and down, over and over again, faster and faster, watching him disappear inside of me. I closed my eyes and put my hands over my stomach between my belly button and my vagina and felt his penis moving inside of me. I started moaning and panting. "Oh oh oh oh unh unh unh yeah oh yeah oh I didn't know I didn't know Oh God I didn't know!"

Dave took my hips in his hands and pulled me down hard onto him and lifted me faster than I could have myself, and he thrust his hips up into me to match my movements. "That's it baby, ride my cock! Ride my cock baby, oh yeah, that's so good, oh yeah ride me baby."

The air was thick and hard to breathe. My thighs were burning from the exercise, sweat was pouring from my body and I had to keep pushing my hair out of my face, but I couldn't stop. Some other power had taken over my body and all I could do was move up and down and up and down. My breasts were bouncing on my chest with every thrust. They started to hurt from all the bouncing, but I didn't care. All I cared about was feeling that penis in my belly and keeping it deep inside of me. I couldn't even speak any more, all I could do was groan and gasp with each thrust.

Below me, Dave's body glistened with sweat, he was moaning too, but he kept talking to me. "Oh that's it baby! Fuck yeah, ride my cock. Oh that's it... I'm almost there baby. Oh you're so hot you're going to make me come! You gonna come baby? You gonna come with me?"

He started moving his hands up my body, and he took my bouncing breasts in both hands and squeezed them tight. My own movement caused them to move against my chest while he supported them, and this sent me over the edge.

Suddenly, my head was swimming. Everything seemed to blur together and I totally lost control of my body. My head thrashed back and forth, my back arched, my arms flailed, my fingers clutched at the bed sheets and I screamed and screamed and screamed. I was having an ORGASM! It was SOO incredible, like this wave of pleasure and emotion just washed over me and swept away my body like a rag doll in the ocean.

When it was over I collapsed onto his chest. I found that I was crying and panting and I kissed his cheeks and neck and shoulders sobbing the whole time "I didn't know... I didn't know."

He just held me and stroked my sweaty hair. I don't know how much time passed before Angel walked in... probably only a few minutes. She didn't knock, just came right in.

"Wow! You two put on quite a show!" she said cryptically. I was suddenly very conscious of her boyfriend's penis still in my vagina, and my own nudity. Dave and I both looked up, but we didn't move too much. Except for my butt, I concealed my privates against his body.

"What do you mean babe? How'd you know we were done?" Dave asked.

"How'd I know? The whole quad knew!" she exclaimed pointing towards the open window right next to my bed.

Without thinking, I sat bolt upright and looked out the window, my hands braced on either side of the frame. Outside a throng of people was looking up at me. In the building across the quad every window had someone's head leaning out, looking my direction. Some of them had binoculars and cameras. As I sat there stunned, the crowds began to whistle and cheer and mimic my screams of ecstasy.

I was too mortified to move. All of these people had seen me sitting there naked! They had seen me lie back and offer myself to Dave and they had seen him take my virginity. They saw me climb on top of him and they saw me in my uncontrollable orgasm. All I could do was stare back at them, still naked, still exposed, with my mouth hanging open. This must have been what Angel's first lover felt when I walked in on them. It took the flashes of the cameras to snap me back to my senses.

By this time, Dave had gotten up and moved away from the window. I wanted to run, I wanted to hide. All I could do was collapse and clutch the bed sheets to my body to conceal myself. In an uncontrollable fit of sobbing, I couldn't make my body work. I was so humiliated, and so embarrassed my brain just shut down. Angel pulled the blinds closed and sat down next to me to comfort me. She laid my head in her lap, and stroked my sweat soaked hair.

"Hey, come on... It's ok... Come on, don't cry," she tried to comfort me. "It's not that bad."

I wanted to scream! I wanted to ask her how the hell she would know. But all I could do was sob and gasp at the stifling air in the room.

"Look," she said, "I've flashed lots of guys. It never hurt my reputation any. A lot of times it made me new friends."

I bet!

"Besides," she continued, "the light was behind you. You were just a silouette on the window screen. I was out there. If I didn't know this was our room, I never would have recognized you."

Yeah right.

"And the guys out in the quad had a lousy angle anyway. All they could see was from the waist up."

That was supposed to make me feel better? I think she honestly thought she was comforting me. I don't remember much more of what she said. Lying curled up in the sheets, naked and sticky from my own sweat and fluids, I must have cried myself to sleep.

It was still dark when I woke up still naked, but the light from outside filtered through the blinds enough for me to see Angel and Dave across the room making love on her bed. Dave was on his knees, leaning way back on his hands. Angel was in the same position with her knees straddling Dave. They were joined at the pelvis and thrusting into one another desperately.

"Oh yeah, fuck me baby!" Angel hissed trying to keep her voice down to avoid waking me. Little did she know. "Gimme that cock. Oh! Oh! Yeah! Uhn! Come on, fuck me hard... Fuck me like you fucked my little roommate's virgin pussy. Oh Yeah! Just like that baby." Dave was grunting quietly as he took her again.

Her large breasts were jumping all over her chest as she pushed herself down on his cock over and over and over again. The muscles in his arms and chest bulged with the effort of supporting both of their weight. I couldn't help but watch, and worse, I couldn't help but wish that it was me over there with Dave's penis inside of me. As I watched them, I felt very empty inside, like something was missing, like there was a big hole in me that needed to be filled. I wanted to make love to Dave again so bad. But I didn't dare let them know I was awake.

As Angel started to orgasm, I reached down and touched myself, delicately this time, like Dave had... not the clumsy prodding attempts at masturbation from high school. I was wet. I knew I would be. Angel gave up and screamed her ecstasy, moaning and panting as she came down from her climax. She and Dave wrapped their arms around each other and he still hadn't taken his penis out of her when I fell asleep again.

It was after 10 when I woke up this morning, naked still. I was physically and emotionally exhausted from everything that happened yesterday, and I needed the sleep. I still feel sore between my legs. I don't know if it's from losing my virginity, or just the exercise of being on top. Angel and Dave were gone when I woke. I just wanted to go home. If there was a phone in the room I would have called Daddy and asked him to come right back and pick me up. But he wouldn't come if I was just homesick, and I NEVER could have told him the truth!

The nearest phone is in the lounge anyway and I didn't want people on the floor to see me crying when I called my father. I'm not a little girl anymore.

I was afraid to go down to the dining hall for breakfast, but I was starving. Hunger finally got the better of me and I decided if people were going to laugh and point and call me a slut, I'd better get it over with.

To my surprise, no one paid me any special attention. No one pointed, no one laughed. Maybe Angel was right. Maybe no one would recognize me.

I did hear people talking about "the girl in the window"... lots of people actually... but nobody seemed to realize it was me. To my surprise, all of the guys talked about how hot she was and wanting to do her! The girls said some pretty mean things about me, but for some reason it didn't bother me. Whenever I heard a girl say something catty, I couldn't help thinking she was jealous, or that she was still a virgin and didn't know what she was talking about.

Now I'M a woman. I'M experienced. All of those mousy little girls in their long skirts and high collars are still virgins, but I'M not. I felt suddenly mature and confident. It was such a change from just a day before! I ate brunch with people from my hall, and we talked and we laughed and I made a lot of new friends today. After we ate, we all went to the bookstore together and hung out on the commons and got to know the campus better. Classes start in just a few days, but I feel like I've gotten my best education in the first 24 hours.

There's a freshman dance tonight. Angel just came back from her house with more luggage. She and Dave will be going to the Dance and I just know that Angel has more she can teach me. I've had a taste of sex and I know I want more!... just maybe with a little more privacy next time. Well, gotta go get changed for the dance. I'll have to shoo Dave out into the hall. After all, a girl has to have some principles! Hopefully, I'll have more to write soon.

Love,
Michelle