My Life as a Rat

In silence, we watched Walter dying on the floor. After a few seconds, I went to him, put my hand on his face and said "I'm sorry that it had to come to this, Walter, but you left me no choice."

Yes, I was justifying what I did, but I didn't do it for him. I'd once been Dani, the gentle medical student. I needed to know that I was still that person. Being able to retain a personality that cared for others, even my enemies, was my ultimate victory over him.

After a while, I stood up and Tim came over to hold me. I even cried a bit while Walter looked at me pleadingly.

After it was finally over, we just left the cell, hand in hand. No traps were active, the light was switched on everywhere, all the doors stood wide open. As we passed the red door, I looked back towards the still-dark area of the twins and the great hall one last time. That mystery would remain unsolved, but I could live with that. Never again did I want to experience that horror. I doubted that I would ever talk to anyone about it. No one would understand it without having experienced it.

We picked up his camera, found the control room and his meticulous schedule on how to torture me. He had pedantically laid out my fate for almost three months to come. Some entries like "Snakes" made me shudder.

Tim had cell phone service again and we sat on the floor exhausted, waiting for the police to come. I looked at my bloody hands and started to sob, glad to feel Tim holding me.

I was awakened by that damn laughter again. My cell. My bed. My desperation. It was all there. My rescue had just been a dream.

"You really think you can escape me? Never. You're mine! You always will be!" Walter was laughing madly.

"Ouch. Not again, Dani. Wake up."

Slowly I came to my senses. Damn, I had slugged my poor husband in my sleep yet again. That shit still haunted me after all these years.

"I'm so sorry, Tim. Where?"

"On the nose. Again," he whined in a clearly exaggerated way through the hand that covered the injured facial feature. It couldn't have been that bad. He was fishing for some compensation, as usual. He always enjoyed this part, as did I, but first, I quickly checked the clock.

"Sorry, buster, morning sex is out. We'll be late. I can offer you a Cappuccino, though."

"Well, I guess I have to take what I can get," he mock-whined.

"Oh, don't be such a baby." We laughed together and I lightly kissed his poor, victimized proboscis. I would make it up to him thoroughly later, and he knew it. Life was good.