On Writing Celebrity Fantasies

In my experience, anti-fans usually don't read fan fiction, and they will bash it if they so much as hear of it. You can work their view of a celebrity into your story as a character's inner conflict, a satire topic, or a character's reason for villainy, but I advise ignoring them otherwise. People who read celebrity fan fiction typically do so because they like the celebrity involved. They usually won't want to hear about how their idol is mean to the press, snobby with rivals, or abusive towards their lovers. Dumb catchphrases and award speeches are fine quote material for establishing a character, but they should not be all we see of a famous face. Of course, you can always have the celebrity suffer for their selfish actions, and then find redemption and reform. Most readers go for that plot well. If an anti-fan does read your story, it's likely they're a fan in disguise and you should please them in that respect.

Honor your celebrity characters whenever possible. Make them people we'd enjoy knowing. This will please fans and show readers why you like the people about whom you are writing. It will also make celebrities who read your stories more inclined to see them as flattery and not the ravings of an obsessed lunatic. Celebrities should not be among the people who receive the stories directly from you, of course, but if they come across your work, you may want them to see you in a positive light. I recognize that there are fan fiction pieces out there which turn celebrities into vampires, drug whores, and other disturbing things. It is hard for me to find these stories appealing, even when they are well-written. I would not want to be in such a situation, and surely a celebrity would not either. Or if they were, they would want some way back to normalcy when all is said and done.

Make sure you get facts right. It can upset fans when you don't. Don't call Muhammad Ali Christian when he's Muslim. Sylvester Stallone did not star in "The Terminator". Natalie Portman is not bald. Wait, she used to be and she made it look sexy. Mention this if you use it.

Now that we have the celebrities down, let's look at their lovers. Obviously, we want these to be appealing characters. That makes for better fantasy. Casting other celebrities is one way of doing things. There are plenty of stories out there that have celebrities in relationships with each other. Actresses Anne Hathaway and Emily Blunt are good friends in real life. Your story makes them more than friends. Readers will eagerly buy into the idea.

You can also create a fantasy lover for the celebrity. A writer who charms an actress with his script, a handsome sound engineer who works well with a popular singer; a heroic cop who saves the tabloid darling from her abusive boyfriend, whatever fits your story best. Basing such a character on a fan is a popular request.

Some writers have even put themselves in their tales. The latter is not as bad as it sounds. You're already creating fantasies about famous people, why not yourself also? Just remember, if you put yourself in a story, you should make yourself likeable. Don't be afraid to idealize yourself as much as you have your more famous characters. The only caution is not to go overboard and create a perfect clone of an actual person. This will not please readers most of the time. Real people should have flaws. You may also want to change certain details for the plot. Is Alyson Hannigan really a lesbian witch, or does she merely play such a character on TV? If the latter is true, maybe she meets a character based on you who convinces her to try lesbianism. Hold on, though. You don't regularly hang out with celebrities, since you don't live or work in Hollywood. But if the character based on you does, things become simpler to arrange.

Talk to your characters while writing them. Usually when I'm writing a celebrity story, I imagine I'm a director and the celebrity has agreed to make a film with me. We're negotiating a contract. Emily Blunt will get naked, fuck Anne Hathaway, and engage in suggestive dialogue with my self-insertion character. She will not get violent or drunk. Keira Knightley is fine with fight scenes, and she'll shag me onscreen. Emily Blunt doesn't want sex with a self-insertion character on our first date. I'm okay with that. Tom Cruise will do comedy, but he won't be very funny. Jennifer Aniston agrees to a brief cameo and that's it. Or maybe I talk her into some threesome action with Courtney Cox and David Arquette. I help her calm down to the idea, and the rest follows naturally.

Often, the character's dialogue and development arcs will come to you during this process. Let them speak to you and become your partner in creating their tale. They may even address things which are giving you trouble. "I don't really love the guy you're making me sleep with, but he might be fun." "Yes, human rights are really important to me." "I've never fucked a woman before, but I would like to." "My husband is not bisexual. I am. The tabloids are confused." "This purity ring is a defense mechanism." "When I sing about want, what I want is sex." If characters talk to you, plots soon spring to mind.

It's easier than you think to transform celebrities into wanton sex maniacs. Hollywood mythology is filled with orgies and secret relationships. The arts attract people of alternative sexuality, dressing rooms can build intimacy, and acting can open minds to new ideas. Jealousy abounds, and so does cheating. If you're stumped for a plot, get a tabloid from your local supermarket and write one of its stories as your own. Just remember the disclaimer and positive spin!

There are many other common gimmicks that can also be used. A chance encounter between a celebrity and fan becomes something more. A director demands a tumble on the casting couch in exchange for a role. An actor performs well opposite his co-star and spice develops between them. Two or more actresses are cast in a film together and become attracted to one another as they bond in character. Celebrities meet at a party and go home with each other. You can also create a situation that works better for your tale. Perhaps there is a place like my club "Inside Out" or a character such as Carnage Jackson's Dean the Agent, which somehow lowers celebrities' inhibitions when they come near. Write the story and see what develops. If all else fails, let your characters tell you how they want to become attracted to each other and fuck. Watch celebrity interviews and movies for inspiration. The plethora of celebrity fantasies based on films in which the celebrities appeared is proof positive they are a good source of ideas.

Above all, relax when you're penning celebrity fantasies. You are a skilled writer, and you know how to make words flow. You can create varied emotions with your stories, and the familiar image of a famous character is an aid in this. An audience is a guarantee when you use a famous character, and it can get high praise when you do things right. Godspeed, fellow artist, and please let me know if my guidance helped you perfect your craft.

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