Speedy Delivery

"Nonsense," she said setting the tray down on the patio table, "you're my guest."

"More like a dinner crasher," I said.

"Annie, please," she scolded, "you're my friend, not some vagrant."

I suddenly felt very small. If only she knew what my life was really like outside of our little dinner ritual. What would she think of me then? Would she even be talking to me? Oh, where did I even think this was going? I decided to put those thoughts aside and concentrate on the soup.

"This is delicious!" I said. "Where did you get it?"

"The soup? I made it. I always make a big batch and freeze some."

"No kidding? I thought soup only came from a can."

She smiled, as if I were telling a joke. I wasn't, but that didn't stop me from enjoying her smile.

"You have a beautiful smile, Miranda." I complemented, "It's not just on your lips, but your whole face lights up."

"Thank you, Annie," she said.

"Oh, I'm gonna be sick," said the strange man, and then continuing in a mocking tone, "your whole face lights up." Who was this jerk?

"Richard what the hell are you doing here?" Miranda scowled. Whoa, holy shit, she was pissed! Ten bucks says he's the ex.

"I came by for the papers my attorney sent over. You didn't answer the doorbell. Did you sign them yet?"

"No! Now leave me alone, I'm having dinner."

"Picking your girlfriends kind of young these days, Miranda."

"Oh, like you should talk, Richard! Can your girlfriend even buy beer?"

"You know, you really are a piece of work! Just sign the damn papers, Miranda." With that, he stormed off.

"I'm sorry you had to witness that, Annie. We used to get along. Things just fell apart one day. Oh, it's my fault really."

"Hey, don't blame yourself, Miranda."

"Annie, I appreciate you taking my side in this, but you really don't know the whole story. I was the one who was unfaithful. He's right. I should just sign the papers. Ten percent and the townhouse is a decent settlement, and truthfully if it went to court I'd probably lose. All this drama over one little night with a girl I'll never see again."

What a minute! Back the truck up! Did she say girl?

Tower, this is Annie, over. Cancel that mayday. Things are looking up, over.

"Miranda, if you want to talk ..." I left it hanging there. What could she possibly want to talk to me about? I had no experience to draw on for any kind of relationship advice. A couple of girls I'd fooled around with in high school was pretty much the extent of it. Nothing exciting had happened since then.

"How about some more wine first? Or do you need to get home? I know you have to wake up early."

"Yeah, about that," I hedged, "um, I kinda got nowhere to go."

"What do you mean nowhere to go? What happened?"

"We sort of got kicked out of our apartment. I'll probably try to crash at a friend's house or something."

"Oh, Annie," she said, laying her hand on my arm again, "I'm your friend. You can stay in my guest room tonight. It's probably too dark for you to ride anywhere safely anyway."

"OK," I said weakly. "Thanks."

"Well, I guess we're in the next phase of our relationship now," Miranda said.

"Um, what's that?" I asked.

"Roomies!" she exclaimed and then held her glass in the air. "To roomies!"

"To roomies," I replied, smiling.

Chapter 5

Despite having a little too much wine with dinner, I woke up feeling refreshed. Not having to listen to my mom and her boyfriend all night long really helped in that respect. Plus the bed in Miranda's guest room was amazingly comfortable.

Yeah, I slept in the guest room. Did you seriously think she was going to come in during the middle of the night, seduce me with her womanly charms, and drag me off to her bed for a night of hot monkey love? Maybe in your dreams -- and mine! -- but that's not how it happened.

As I wandered off to the bathroom that morning, I found a note stuck to the mirror.

"Cereal in the cupboard to the left of the sink, juice in the fridge, and pastries of course! I'm not an early riser, otherwise I'd make you pancakes."

I smiled as I turned on the shower. "She wants to make me pancakes!" I thought, "God, Miranda! Do you know how much you're killing me here? How about we just skip the pancakes and I drizzle the syrup directly on you instead."

I pushed my lust aside and wrote a short response to her note.

"Thanks for the room. I'll pay rent. I do have a job. Let me know my share."

As I stood in the shower, I suddenly got it in my head that I should shave. I mean normally I don't, and it's not like I've got a jungle down there, but I know some girls don't like hairy. I was kind of half hoping that I might need a reason to look more presentable, so I figured maybe a clean shave was the way to go.

Oh, Miranda, what are you doing to me?

*

I got to work to find a grumpier than usual dispatcher. "Annie, this ain't your locker room," he said pointing to my rucksack, "take your shit home at the end of your shift."

"Aye-aye skipper!" I said and shot him a salute.

He flipped me the bird and then grinned. "Got a good one for you this morning. Law firm, good tippers."

"Cool. Thanks, boss."

I really liked this client. They were nice people, not at all like the stereotypical lawyers you hear jokes about. OK, so what do you call fifty lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start. Get it? OK, never mind. That really didn't apply with these guys. Small firm, very friendly and most of them even knew me by name.

"Thanks for the delivery, Annie."

"No prob. Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, what is it?"

"I've got a friend gonna get divorced. How would she know if she's getting a good settlement?"

"That's a tough one, it depends on a lot of things. Did she work or did her husband support her?"

"I don't think she ever had a job."

"Well, I'd say she's entitled to at least half of the total assets based on that. Any kids involved?"

"I don't think so. I think she might have had an affair though. One-night stand."

"One night? That's nothing. Listen, I'm really just guessing here unless I talk to her. So give her my card, OK?"

"Sure. Hey, thanks!"

"My pleasure. Hope it works out for your friend."

"Me too!" I shouted as I raced out the door. I rode as hard as I could, not back to work, but back to Miranda's place. I had to tell her before she signed those papers. The bike was a dream, but I was still breathing hard and covered in a light sheen of perspiration by the time I arrived at Miranda's door. I rang the doorbell and waited.

"Hi Annie!" she said cheerfully, and then, "Oh, I didn't give you a key yet. Sorry, roomie." That got a little smile from me. "Are you alright? You seem a little flustered."

"Don't sign those papers!" I heaved.

"What?"

"The divorce settlement. Don't sign it yet." I handed Miranda the card and gave her a quick rundown of my conversation at the law firm.

"Half?" she asked again.

"That's what he told me. But he said you're going to have to talk with him, you know to go over the details."

"Thanks, Annie!" she said sincerely. "Hey, did you have lunch yet? I'll heat something up if you want to run through the shower." I must have given her that puzzled look again, because she continued. "You're a little sweaty." She dragged her fingertip over my forearm to illustrate.

"Yeah, I guess I should," I replied and wandered off to find the bathroom again. Out of the corner of my eye I swear I saw Miranda pop her finger into her mouth and suck on it. Holy shit! Was she tasting me? I could see that her face was lighting up again, so she must have thought my flavor was pretty decent. I was getting weak in the knees just thinking about it. Better make that a cold shower!

"Even if I only get a third of the assets, it's still better than the settlement he was offering," she was saying as we sat down to lunch. "I really appreciate this, Annie," she said and laid her hand on my arm again. I was beginning to really like it when she did that -- and I mean a lot.

"Um, I should probably get back to work," I said nervously and stood up. "Let me help you with the dishes."

"It's OK, I'll get them in a minute. Right now, I'm going to call your lawyer friend." She picked up the phone and waved goodbye.

*

"Nice of you to show up again, Annie," was the greeting from the dispatcher as I walked in, "you get lost or something?"

"Just stopped off for lunch, man," I said and stuck my tongue out at him. "So what you got for me?" He handed me a package.

I finished out the rest of my day in a daze and was nearly run over twice in traffic. I just couldn't stop thinking about Miranda. I really hoped she got some good news about her settlement, she deserved to be happy. Not that money necessarily brings happiness, but it sure as hell can't hurt. If it could make her smile, that's all that mattered.

Now it was my turn to smile as I opened Miranda's front door using my key. She gave me a key! How cool was that? "Sorry, Miranda, no treats," I said as I walked in, "I guess we could order pizza. I got some good tips today."

"Actually, I was thinking we should go out," she announced as she stepped into view, "I've got some good news I wanted to share."

I said nothing, just stared. I had lost the power of speech again. Miranda was standing there in a cheery little summer dress that showed off an awful lot of leg and really hugged her curves quite nicely. She had her dark hair loosely pinned up and I saw a few untamed strands escaping. My god, she was gorgeous! "Are you OK, Annie?" she asked.

"I think I need another shower," I managed to answer.

"OK, but don't take too long, I'm starving," she said and ran her finger over my forearm again. I didn't hang around long enough to see if she would pop it in her mouth, I just made a beeline for the bathroom and turned the water on to full cold.

Chapter 6

The restaurant we went to was really nice, but fortunately still casual enough that I didn't feel completely out of place there. What had Miranda called it? A tappas bar? It was awesome -- like, all you can eat appetizers! There were so many different kinds and I was determined to try each and every one.

"So, what do you think, Annie?" Miranda asked me between bites.

"This is great!" I said.

"No, about the wine?" she reminded me.

"Oh sure, wine sounds good. I don't know much about it, so whatever you think is good is probably going to be fine by me."

Miranda giggled.

"What?" I asked.

"You're so refreshing, Annie! Richard was always so damned picky about his wine and he would never let me choose. 'This is an excellent vintage, Miranda, I'm surprised you're not enjoying it more,' he would say."

Now it was my turn to giggle. She did a really good impression of her ex. I had only met the man that one time, but it seemed to me that he was kind of an arrogant jerk.

"It's probably none of my business, Miranda, but I think you're better off without him. He seemed kind of -- well, stuffy."

"He was a pompous ass, Annie!" she giggled, "I have no idea why it took me so long to see that."

"Well, you seem much happier now."

"I am happy," she said, smiling. "I really like hanging out with you."

I smiled back. She was touching my arm again. You keep doing that Miranda and I'm not going to be able to hold myself back!

"You're pretty fun to hang out with yourself," I said, toning it down for her. What was I supposed to say? 'If you keep touching my arm that way I'm going to throw you down on the table and have you for my next appetizer'? That's not what friends say to each other, not even when they are roomies. Especially not when they're roomies!

"So, I've got to tell you the good news! Your lawyer friend seems to think that I should be entitled to half of the assets and he might be able to negotiate the townhouse too. That's quite a change from the original offer. He's going to call Richard's attorney and work out the details. I won't be signing anything until I hear back."

"Wow! I'm happy for you."

"It's good to have something nice happen for a change," she said, "and it wouldn't have happened at all if I hadn't met you. Thank you so much, Annie!"

"Glad I could help," I said somewhat uncomfortably. Miranda was holding my hand across the table now.

Tower, this is Annie, over. Forget about that crash landing. I am at forty-thousand feet and climbing rapidly! Repeat, forty-thousand feet, over.

"Oh," she said releasing me, "here comes the wine."

Miranda inspected the cork and nodded her approval. The waiter poured us two glasses, each one-quarter full. "This is good," I said.

"I'm sure Richard would not approve of my choice, but I like it. I'm glad you do too."

We just sat and talked and generally enjoyed each other's company until about eight o'clock. She didn't hold my hand again, but she did touch my arm a few more times. I'm not complaining.

"Well, I suppose we should get going, you being an early riser and all," she said as she pulled out her credit card for the bill.

"Let me get that," I protested, "I'm living in your house, running deliveries on your bike -- it's the least I could do."

"Annie," she smiled, "it was my idea to celebrate, so I'm paying. Besides I think I can probably afford it after my conversation with your lawyer friend."

"Thanks, Miranda," I said, and then added, "This was a really nice way to spend the evening."

"Yes it was."

Chapter 7

My really nice evening had given way to a rather shitty morning. My crotch was itchy. I had to either make up my mind to shave every day or I was going to suffer until it grew out again. But that was not the worst of my problems. I got to work only to find that the dispatcher was even grumpier than usual.

"We're gettin' thrown out," he complained, "losing the lease. Some jerk-off land developer bought the entire building just so he can tear it down and build condos. Like we need any more freakin' condos in this city!"

"I'm sorry," I said. What else could I do? I picked up my package and wandered off.

"Hey, Annie!" he called out. "If you need a reference or something, just let me know. You're a good kid, real dependable, and I'm gonna miss you."

"Aww, you might just be human after all," I teased.

"Don't you go telling anybody!" he said sternly and then broke out in a big grin.

This sucks! What the hell was I going to do? I knew what Miranda would say. She'd just tell me I could take a pass on the rent until I found another job. It's nice to know I had that safety net, but I really didn't want to strain our friendship by becoming her personal charity project.

I finished up the rest of my day in a bit of a daze. At least it ended on somewhat of a good note. My last delivery for the day -- no, make that my last delivery at this job -- was for the deli. I was coming home with another extra-large hero! Small victory, but I had to take what I could get.

"Hey, Miranda," I said as I walked through the door, "I've got some good news and some bad news." Totally cliche, I know, but it was the truth.

"Can I have the good news first?"

I held up the bag and cheerfully announced, "Another hero!"

She looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to continue.

"The bad new is that I lost my job," I said glumly, "Lost the whole company, actually. The building's getting torn down."

Miranda said nothing, she just put her hand on my arm. Though this time I found it more of a comfort than an invitation to take her in a passionate lip-lock. "Then I guess we're entering the next phase of our relationship," she said.

"What's that?" I asked. "Charity case?"

"Business partners!" she responded cheerfully. I know I had that confused look again, because she continued explaining. "I got a call from my attorney today. Richard wants to up the settlement to forty percent and I get the townhouse free and clear as long as I agree not to fight him in court. I'm going to take the offer, Annie."

"That's wonderful Miranda," I said sincerely, "but I don't understand what it's got to do with being business partners."

"Part of the payout is a lump sum, so I'm going to need to make some investments. I was thinking of maybe starting up a courier service, but I'll be honest, I really know nothing about the business."

She smiled. Her whole face was beaming and it was infectious. I soon found myself breaking out into a huge grin. Quite a turn-around from the way my day started. I was giddy, high almost. For the first time in my life things were actually going my way! Maybe that's why I felt I had enough courage to finally say it.

"Miranda, I have to tell you something," I started.

"Yes, Annie," she said, taking my hand. I don't know if her touch was making this easier or harder for me, but I decided to take comfort in it as I forged onward.

"Miranda," I started again, "I'm gay. I've known this since the sixth grade -- and I've had a huge crush on you since the day we first met. You're always getting in my head and I can't stop thinking about you. Look, I know you don't feel the same way, but I thought you should know before we become business partners. I don't want things to be awkward, and ..."

I stopped talking suddenly as Miranda pressed her finger to my lips.

"Annie, can you pause for a second?" she said.

"Um, sure."

"I'm not blind. I see the way you look at me, the way you react when I touch you." She demonstrated by placing her hand on my arm again. I felt the gooseflesh raising on my skin. "I'm just sorry I never said anything out loud. I guess my signals just weren't strong enough. So how's this?" She leaned in and kissed me gently on the lips.

Tower, this is Annie, over. Requesting victory fly-by. Say again, requesting fly-by, over!

"I mean, my god Annie," she said as we broke our embrace, "did you think I would give my bike to just any girl who showed up at my door? I knew how much it was worth -- I'd taken it to a shop when I was thinking about selling it -- and I had a strong feeling that I could trust you not to run off with it. So my devious little plan was this, I thought that loaning you the bike might keep you coming around once in a while. I didn't where things would go from there, but it was a start.

"I've had it pretty bad for you since that first day too." She punctuated the end of her speech with a caress of my arm and another peck on the lips. "I'll gladly show you just how bad later tonight, but first, if we're going into business together, we're going to need to look very respectable. So we're getting you in for a haircut and then I'm taking you suit shopping. So I need to know, skirt or trousers?"

"Trousers," I said, "I'm not really a skirt girl."

"I didn't think so," she answered, taking my hand and pulling me toward the door. I was walking on air again.

Chapter 8

When we got home, I had a new hairstyle, three new business suits, and a serious burning in my loins.

"Aren't you going to model any of your new clothes for me, Annie?" Miranda was asking me with a lecherous look in her eye.

"Didn't you get enough of an eyeful in the dressing room?" I teased. I thought the tailor was going to pass out each time we walked by, hand-in-hand, to try on another suit.

I have to admit, I thought I cleaned up pretty nicely. Of course Miranda had shown me her approval as well, and with each suit I tried on, she leaned in to give me a kiss. They started out small and grew more passionate with each trip to the fitting room. It's probably good that we left after only three, otherwise we might have been thrown out for lewd behavior.

"So what are you hungry for?" Miranda asked, staring in the fridge.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" I said pulling her away from the fridge and lifting her onto the kitchen counter.