Trailing Home Ch. 05

Out of necessity, the emigrants learned how to make the most of their privacy. They pitched their tents a respectful distance from one another so that not every little noise could be heard. If they lit their lanterns inside the tents, they learned to place them on the side nearest their neighbors to avoid displaying a rather graphic silhouette of naked bodies or amorous couples for everyone else to view.

The travelers got along well together for the most part. There were a few minor disagreements, but they all realized the necessity of cooperating with each other, and folks were always willing to help out their neighbors. They began to form a fairly close knit group as the days passed.

The only exception seemed to be Natasha. She whined incessantly about the dust, the bumpy trail, the monotony of the food, the damage to her clothes, and any other discomforts she had to endure. As Liam observed her, he mentally gave thanks that Selena was nothing like the other woman. Instead, Selena was easy to please, and she never complained about the trip. Liam had noticed that she worked diligently and efficiently, helping with whatever work was required until it was completed. The thought of her becoming a true wife to him, his helpmate and partner in life, began to settle comfortably into his mind.

Liam and Selena gradually got to know each other better, as they exchanged stories while they rode. They shared a lively sense of humor, and they laughed often at each other's antics. Selena grew more and more fond of her husband with each passing day, and she began to long for his smiles and the touch of his hand. He was forever teasing her or playing some practical joke or another, and she loved his joy for life. Liam hadn't kissed her for a long time, and she began to brood over the fact, unaware in her innocence that he was holding his desire sternly in check. Still, they forged a bond of friendship and easy camaraderie that made the days pass with very little boredom.

They traveled six days out of every seven, resting only on Sundays. Selena began to look forward to the Sabbath, when everyone took a well-deserved break from their travel to rest and recuperate. The women did the laundry and baking while the men hunted or repaired the wagons. Sunday meals were tastier, since they had a bit more time to find game or fish to add to their dinners. However, having a day off was a mixed blessing, since it only heightened the sexual tension that was gradually increasing between Selena and Liam. They were both aware of it, but neither of them acknowledged it.

Still, they grew more and more comfortable in each other's presence. They became accustomed to the feeling of their thighs and shoulders brushing while they rode on the wagon. Even so, Liam's arm would occasionally brush against Selena's breast if they hit a particularly deep rut, and she was inclined to blush while he squirmed beside her on the bench. Liam was finding it increasingly difficult to avoid touching Selena. It seemed that everything about her, the way she moved, the way she smelled, the way she looked at him, was designed to inflame his lust. He would often catch himself watching her with a bulge in his breeches, and he would shake his head in self-disgust. He was acting like a love-sick teenager, hoping for his first kiss.

Liam would have been surprised to know that Selena was equally distracted by him. Her fascination with her husband grew ever more compelling as the days went by. She caught glimpses of him when they were alone, and sometimes a hunger would sprout in the pit of her belly while she watched him. One morning in particular, she looked up to see him shaving, and her breath caught in her throat. He had removed his shirt to lather his face, and she stared at the rippling muscles on his back and arms, highlighted by the flickering firelight. She averted her gaze when he turned toward her, but her pulse was pounding and her throat was suddenly dry.

Some days were rainy, and Selena would huddle beneath the canvass as the rain came down in steady sheets. She was chilled and uncomfortable, but at least it wasn't so dusty. The rain made their progress slower, and on those days they usually managed to travel only a few miles before they stopped to make camp. They would pitch the tent on those nights, and Selena was grateful for the protection it gave them. Still, their blankets were damp and cold, and she would toss on her pallet, trying to stay warm.

Liam tossed for different reasons. He was finding it nearly impossible to sleep beside Selena and not make love to her. Many times he would wake up during the night, and his eyes would search her out in the darkness. He wondered how she would react if he were to wake her up with kisses, but he couldn't quite get up the nerve. He didn't want to do anything to disturb the closeness that was growing between them, and Selena hadn't given him any indication that she would welcome his advances. His body was strained to the limits. It was one thing to remain celibate for long periods of time when a man was alone, but when he was constantly faced with a tempting woman, ever at hand but always beyond his grasp, it became pure torture.

One evening during the third week, Liam was unhitching the oxen to turn them loose for the night. He was bent over unfastening one of the straps when one of the huge beasts jerked sideways, flinching from a particularly nasty bite from a fly. Liam was caught off balance, and he toppled back, landing on his rear. He jumped up nearly as fast as he had fallen and without thinking, brushed a hand across the stinging pain in his bottom.

"Damn!" he swore viciously, looking down to see several spines from a cactus lodged in his palm and fingers.

Selena had been building a camp fire, but when she heard the curse, she came running. "What's the matter?" she asked. Seeing Liam's pained grimace, she rushed forward with concern. "Are you hurt? What happened?" She took his hand in hers and anxiously examined it, biting her lip when she saw the wicked looking needles. "Come here and let me get those out." She tugged at his hand, but he made no move to follow her.

"Let me finish unhitching the team. You go get the medical kit, and I'll be there in a minute," he said.

"I can unhitch them," she offered, "you shouldn't be using this hand until I get these needles out."

"I said I'd do it," he growled. He realized his voice sounded rougher than he intended, and Selena gave him a frown. "Sorry," he said more gently. "I'll finish. I'm almost done."

Realizing there was no use arguing with him, Selena heaved an exasperated sigh and went to dig the medical kit out from the wagon. Liam finished unhitching the oxen, but he was reluctant to face Selena. He was embarrassed to admit that he had sat on a cactus. However, he knew he would have to tell her. He had to let her remove the spines or they would get infected. Cactus spines could cause a nasty sore even after they were removed, and he grimaced at the thought.

He joined Selena, but when she would have started on his hand, he delayed her further. "You'd better start the fire. It's already getting dark and you'll likely need the light to see what you're doing."

"But Liam, it will only take me a minute to get those out," she protested.

"Just do it," he snapped.

She frowned at him again, wondering why he was being so testy, but she quickly built a fire. When it was glowing brightly, she returned to his side.

"Now, sit down and let me tend to your hand."

"I'd prefer to stand, if you don't mind," he mumbled.

Selena sighed heavily and gave him a stern look. "Don't be such a baby. I'm not going to hurt you, now sit down."

She gave him a firm push and he landed on a nearby log. His yowl of pain took Selena completely off guard, and she stared at him in confusion as he scrambled up again.

"What on earth is the matter with you?" she asked, noticing his face turning a deep shade of red.

Liam refused to meet her eye and pointed to his back. "I've got more cactus needles in my rear."

Selena stood for a long moment as understanding dawned on her face. She struggled to contain her laughter, but it finally erupted in a series of small giggles that bloomed into full belly laughs that shook her slender frame. Liam glared down at her, not appreciating the humor of the situation one bit. He raised a disapproving brow and waited impatiently for her humor to subside.

When she finally calmed somewhat, he growled in a menacing tone, "If you've finished laughing at me, I would appreciate some assistance."

"Sorry," she said, but her twitching lips negated her apology.

She bent over his hand and used the tweezers to carefully pluck the spines from his skin. Despite his discomfort, Liam enjoyed the sight of her with brows knit in concentration as she focused on the task. When they were both satisfied that she had gotten all of them, Selena washed his hand and rubbed some ointment into his palm and fingers to take the sting out of his hand. Her gentle touch soothed the pain in his hand but not the sting to his pride.

"Now, you'd better let me see about your bottom. Lie on your stomach and unfasten your pants."

She motioned for him to stretch out close to the fire so she would have good light. However, when she knelt beside him and looked at his behind, she started to giggle again.

"What is it now?" he grumbled.

"You're going to need to change your pants entirely. A bunch of the stickers are in the cloth." She placed a hand on his shoulder when he started to rise. "Stay there. I'll get you a clean pair."

Liam watched as she stretched to reach his clothes in the back of the wagon. Despite his discomfort, he enjoyed the display of shapely ankles when she rose on tiptoes. In no time, she was back with a clean pair of his pants and a towel.

"Here," she said, handing him the towel. "You can use this for modesty, but you need to take your trousers off while I get the stickers out of your butt."

Liam couldn't remember ever feeling so embarrassed, but he kicked off his boots and glanced around to make sure there was no one close enough to witness his humiliation. Satisfied that their campsite was relatively private, he unbuttoned his trousers and carefully slipped them off his hips, keeping the towel in front of him. He wasn't sure why he suddenly felt so self-conscious in front of Selena. He had removed his clothes in front of her before without a second thought.

Selena turned away, more to hide her blush that because she didn't want to see him undress. She was reminded of another time he had whisked his trousers off, and she vividly remembered the incident down to the last, thoroughly masculine detail. When Liam was stretched out on his stomach, she knelt beside him. The sight of his naked behind was enough to set her hands to trembling, and she took a deep breath to steady her racing pulse.

She set to work, meticulously removing the tiny barbs. She was soon engrossed in the task, and forgot about his nakedness. Liam had no such respite. He hid his face in his folded arms and gritted his teeth to keep from moaning with frustration. Her warm, soft hands on his buttocks wreaked havoc on his already strained self-control, and it was only grim determination that kept him from sweeping her down on the grass beside him and having his way with her. By the time she had removed all the stickers, his brow was coated with a thin layer of perspiration and his jaw was rigid.

"There," she said at last, sitting back on her heels to admire her handiwork. She ran a hand over his buttocks to check for any remaining spikes and she was surprised to hear a muffled groan. "Did I miss one?" she asked anxiously, bending closer to look.

"No," he ground out. "Just hurry up and finish."

Selena frowned, confused by his irritated tone, but she took a clean cloth and washed his bottom with soap and warm water. "Let me put some ointment on here and you'll feel much better."

She gently smeared the cream on his buttocks and massaged it into the skin. She was reluctant to finish, enjoying the feel of his muscular bottom beneath her fingers, but at length, she stopped.

"Alright," she said, rising to her feet. "You can put your pants on now."

"Thanks," came his muffled reply.

Liam made sure she was turned away before he hastily rose and donned the clean pants. He mumbled an excuse and quickly walked away so she wouldn't see the telltale bulge in his breeches.

By the time he returned, she had dinner ready. Liam sat down gingerly, wincing as his bottom touched the ground and accepted a plate from her without meeting her eye. Selena sat beside him and they ate in silence. However, every once in a while, she was inclined to release a small giggle. Finally, she caught Liam's eye, and when she started to laugh, he joined her.

For the next few days, every time they hit a large bump, Liam would suck in his breath, and Selena would giggle. She insisted on applying more ointment each evening, and by the third day, Liam's discomfort was completely gone, at least from his butt.

**********

A few days later, Selena surprised Liam with a birthday cake that she made especially for him. They had finished their supper when she brought the cake to him, and she was beaming with pride. It was surprisingly light and moist, and she sat watching happily as he devoured a large slice while she ate a smaller piece.

"I'm glad you like it," she said. "I wasn't sure when your birthday is. You just said it was sometime in May, so I thought tonight would be as good a time as any."

Liam grinned, pleased that she had remembered. "It's actually tomorrow," he said, "the eighteenth of May."

"Oh good, so it's not late then." Selena leaned back against the rock Liam was leaning against, her shoulder brushing his as she stared up into the starry sky. "You should make a wish."

After a long silence, she turned to Liam and was surprised to see a serious expression in his eyes as he watched her. Her breath caught in her throat. His eyes held a strange yearning, and her heart leapt in her chest.

"And if I were to make a wish," he murmured, the huskiness of his tone sending shivers down her spine, "would you be willing to make it come true?"

Selena swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. "That depends." Her eyes searched his in the firelight. "What is it that you wish for?"

Liam's own heart was pounding. He hadn't been this nervous with a woman since he was fifteen. "What if I were to tell you that I wished for you to kiss me?" He raised one challenging brow, holding his breath to see her reaction.

A long moment passed, and just when Liam was certain that Selena would refuse, she leaned hesitantly toward him. Reaching up to cup his cheek, she touched her lips to his, softly at first, then with growing warmth. It was the first time that she had ever initiated a kiss, and Liam felt a heady sense of triumph. His arms encircled her waist, bringing her more fully around to face him. She tensed for a brief moment before relaxing into him, allowing him to pull her fully against him as he took control of the kiss.

He delved into the softness of her mouth, feeling her fingers threading through the hair at his nape. Her responsiveness gnawed at his senses, and he reached up to cup her breast. The soft flesh swelled into his hand, the nipple a gratifyingly hard nub against his palm. The blood was pounding through his loins by the time he raised his head.

"I want you," he breathed.

Selena stared up at him, seeing the burning desire in his hazel eyes, feeling the heat of his hand still cupping her breast. She was tempted to give him what she knew he wanted, but she needed more from Liam than just a sharing of their bodies. She wanted his love and tenderness. She wanted to share his life and grow old together. She released a shuddering sigh and rose to her feet.

"I'd better get these dishes washed up," she said softly. "We have a busy day tomorrow."

Without another word, she turned away, gathering the plates and pots. Liam glared at her back, furious with her that she could so easily dismiss him when she consumed all his thoughts. He knew she hadn't been unaffected by the kiss. He had felt her soften in his arms, and her sweet responsiveness had shaken him to his core.

Why was she so reluctant to let him make love to her? Was she still afraid because of her stepfather's abuse? Gradually, his anger dissipated, and he rose to retrieve his towel and soap from the wagon.

"Goodnight, Selena. I'm going to take a bath." Liam said over his shoulder, and he strode down toward the river.

Selena breathed a long sigh, watching his retreating back until it disappeared. Her breast still felt the imprint of his hand, and there was an aching hunger between her thighs, but she dared not call him back. It would have been so easy to yield to him, but she knew she would hate herself afterward. She wondered forlornly whether she was expecting too much from him. Maybe it would be better to take what he offered her now and hope for more in the future. Her mind stubbornly rejected that notion, and she concentrated on finishing the dishes, but her body didn't relent. That night, she found it nearly impossible to sleep, and she stifled a groan as she wondered how much longer she would be able to resist her body's own building hunger.