A Beauteous Flower Ch. 20

Chapter 20 - A Homecoming, a New Beginning, Thanks All Around and Flights of Angels.

*****

As Madison entered the house, she heard the rubble in the cabin shift. Behind her Daniel stood and shambled after her, a huge, bloody, sweaty mountain of emotion. Her man was on his way home, and Madison would be ready when he got there.

She wanted this. She had pushed herself and Daniel to this point. Madison loved Daniel and she could save him. Her love could reach him through all his self-loathing and rage and make him whole again and she wanted that more than anything. She wanted Daniel, all of him, to feel her love down deep in his heart and now was her time. Not like every other time in their relationship, when Madison focused on herself and what she wanted instead of what Daniel needed. She wouldn't let that happen. Not this time.

"Madison," Daniel growled in a low voice from just outside the door, uncertain and swathed in the darkness. Madison felt another low rumble issue from his chest, and she turned and faced him.

"Come in, Daniel," she whispered into the blackness. "I'm here for you. Don't be afraid."

Madison reached over and snapped on the kitchen light. Whatever happened next between them, Madison wanted it to happen in the light where they could see each other. Face to face. Daniel loomed into the kitchen, first one tentative step and then another, so Madison stepped back towards her goal and summoned him.

"Come home, Daniel. Come home to me."

Madison's body fluttered with nervous energy. Her heartbeat quickened, and her skin tightened as Daniel stepped into full view. Muscles strained, his bare chest heaved with each breath, and blood oozed thickly from the wound on his shoulder. He looked wild, immense, and dangerous.

Madison's body tingled as Daniel cautiously advanced toward her. The sight of his body, primal, predatory, streaked with sweat and blood, gave her an electric charge of fear and desire like nothing she had ever experienced. The Faceless man of fantasy was right there in front of her, and the moment she had dreamed of since she first got her period was here at last. Her Little Red Riding Hood fantasy had come true, and she was about to be taken by the Faceless man, only this time, she would not be helplessly ravished from behind. She would look the Faceless man, her Daniel, in his dusky green eyes and love him.

"I'm right here, Daniel, and I love you." Madison intoned in a low sexy purr. "Come to me."

Just a few feet behind her the spot where Steve the Oaf had kissed her waited. Madison backed towards it and willed Daniel to her. It had to happen there so that, together, she and Daniel could reclaim their home from the evil spirit of the party. Madison continued her slow, naked retreat until she felt the cool of the edge of counter-top beneath her fingertips. Daniel followed warily, and his head swung right and left as if he expected some kind of ambush. Despite her fear and sexual excitement, Madison teared up.

"I love you, Daniel," Madison whispered through tears. "I swear I won't hurt you."

To urge him on, Madison beckoned him to her embrace.

"Come to me, Daniel! Come to me! Please!"

Daniel slammed the door shut behind him. He emitted a low uncertain growl and his angry eyes searched Madison's body.

"It's OK, Daniel. I'm here for you. I love you."

Daniel advanced another step towards Madison and her breath caught with fright and longing. She no longer saw a Faceless man full of a lustful that terrified her and then fucked her. She saw only Daniel's face, etched with pain and her heart throbbed like it might burst against her ribs.

"Oh, my God! I'm sorry!"

As Daniel stalked towards her, Madison backed closer to the counter. Trapped between the counter and Daniel, Madison's resolve wavered and fear threatened to engulf her desire. Daniel looked so huge and savage that she feared he might hurt her. His bulk loomed above her like a dark aura of threat. Madison whimpered and shrank away as he menaced closer. He was close now; so close he could reach out and touch her and she winced as if she expected him to strike.

As Madison cringed against the counter, Daniel pounced forward, seized her by the upper arms, and roughly pressed her into the kitchen cabinets. A distressed cry slipped from Madison's lips, and she clenched her eyes shut. There they balanced, Madison frightened and breathless and Daniel, strained and urgent. Madison wept a gasp at the rough electricity from his touch, and she recoiled into herself. Daniel seemed to surround her, big and strong, and Madison wilted, weak and small in his clutches as he sniffed at her scent. The musk of his sweat, the intense heat of his body, the hot slickness of his blood and the possessive growl of his breath, all seemed so wild and out of control, but that was not what terrified her. What terrified her was that Cassidy had been right. This wasn't some ripple of sensation and a make up fuck. It was a consuming and totally committed leap out over a dark, yawning and bottomless maw. A terrifyingly blind leap in the faith that love, her love for Daniel and Daniel's love for her, would catch her before she fell into that dark, yawning and bottomless maw.

On the edge of it Madison was awed by the depth of the unknown of it all. She had thought she had changed and that she was ready for this and wanted this, but on the cusp of this leap she realized a deep and unmitigated terror. For her relationship with Daniel to work, Madison would have to give up control, give up herself, give up everything she was to Daniel and to them. Never in her life had she even considered such selflessness and sacrifice. What would happen? Daniel might hurt her, or worse yet, might Daniel still leave and divorce her? What if she gave herself over to him, opened herself to him, gave her all, and he still abandon her? Could she live with his rejection on that level? It seemed so hideously contrary to everything she knew, had been told, about a relationship. To have a chance with Daniel, to be with him for a life together, she had to risk everything, give up herself, and she couldn't be certain of the result. Fear snatched her breath away.

But despite the terror in her chest, Madison forced herself to open her eyes. Madison couldn't yield to fear now. This was her Daniel and he needed her, all of her, and she wanted to be with him more than anything else in the world. Slowly, timidly she raised her eyes to meet his gaze. There in Daniel's dusky green eyes brimmed a terrified plea and Madison's heart surged with sympathy. As wild and out of control as it all seemed, her Daniel, her sweet, quiet Daniel, was right there in front of her, with her in this moment of a fearful leap of faith, and that was all she wanted in the world. In that moment she made her choice and gave herself to Daniel completely. To Madison it didn't matter what the future held if she didn't have Daniel, and for him, for them, she would give up everything, herself, for the chance to be with him for the rest of their lives.

In that moment, Madison made her choice. She chose Daniel, her quiet and sweet Daniel, and she chose the warmth of them together against the world of cold and loneliness, and she didn't care what it cost her as long as Daniel was with her. With her choice made, Madison's fear fled before the warmth that surged out of Madison's heart as she chose to sacrifice herself and give and receive love. Cautiously and tenderly, Madison cradled Daniel's face. As Daniel pressed himself closer, Madison looked deep into his eyes and told him what she wanted him to know.

"I'm sorry!" Madison wept to him. "I hate the person I was! I hate what I did to you!

Daniel blinked moist green understanding.

"But since I met you, I want to change, Daniel!" averred Madison passionately. "I will change! I have changed! Changed for you! Since I've met you, I haven't been with anyone else and I'll never be with anyone else! I'll always be here for you! Your safe with me! You can tell me anything, everything, and I'll never leave you! I promise! No matter what, I'll be here! I'm yours forever."

Pained and grateful tears formed in Daniel's eyes.

"I want to be your someone, Daniel, because I love you!"

It took all her dancer's strength and balance to remain poised against the countertop as they locked into a timeless gaze. Daniel's eyes penetrated to Madison's soul, and her eyes penetrated into his. In that moment, naked and vulnerable, Madison and Daniel began to fold into one being, and nothing was hidden between them. Each of them felt the best and worst of the other and the magnitude of it broke over them like a tidal wave.

"Oh, my God!" Daniel and Madison whispered to each other in shocked unison.

Madison gently kissed Daniel's lips and their tongues entwined, and passionate fire spread between their bodies. Eternal seconds later, their lips parted with Madison's sob, and she clutched Daniel's shoulders for support. At her nod of encouragement, Daniel's hands clamped onto Madison's hips. As one, their bodies quivered together in shared tension.

Madison's fingers trembled Daniel's pants open, and they slipped easily off his hips to the floor. With no clothes between them, Daniel's arms surged like pistons and lifted Madison to a narrow seat on the countertop, pinned motionless between his body and cabinets so that her toes dangled above the floor. With an urgent growl, Daniel thrust his hips and his body found its mark like a warm piece of tight skinned iron and filled Madison in a way so huge and stiff that it stunned her. The physical and psychic shock of a complete, naked and unfettered union forced an airless gasp from Madison's lips. With their eyes locked and bodies merged, all pretense and barriers between them crumbled. Alone in that moment, they connected, mind body and soul, and they hovered together on a brink of a shared plunge. Madison's heart thrilled, and she shuddered as pleasures and pains and fears and doubts and loneliness and longing and a thousand other elements of their united beings rushed from each of them to the other like a full moon tide.

"I love you," she whispered to him in a tearfully vulnerable voice of desire. "I love you!"

Daniel surged inside Madison while she cradled his face in her hands, and together they experienced the depths of themselves. Madison moaned her desire and Daniel groaned in response and he thrust forward, harder, deeper, stronger into Madison. The world compressed around them, strung tight with anticipation.

With their bodies and souls yoked together they strained forward, but not in the familiar unhurried rhythm of the woodpile. This was a race, rushed and straining, towards something unknown and expectant. Where they had always been firm and gentle, they became rough and frenzied. Where they had been caring and giving, they became urgent and possessory. Where they had been controlled and restrained, they became crazed and reckless. Daniel hammered his body against Madison, and Madison, unable to move because of her precarious perch, simply and greedily absorbed each impact. Their united bodies worked intuitively together as Daniel braced their weight, and Madison clutched him to lock their embrace. Daniel, corded with strained muscles and slick with a musk of their sweat and blood and effort, slithered and slipped within Madison's grip. Timelessly entwined, they shared air and space and emotion and body and soul.

Previously, Daniel had always been silent when they made love, but now he grunted and moaned in a chorus of effort and pleasure with Madison. Their synchronized breath rasped in raw gulps of shared air. Daniel accelerated again and Madison wailed abject enjoyment at each thrust, and she clung to him, desperate to maintain their connection. Engulfed by such a visceral and intimate connection, Madison felt her sense of herself slip, and she swooned and gave herself over to what had become themself. In answer, Daniel accelerated the pace again and Madison saw in Daniel's eyes that he had surrendered to themself as well. Bound together they strained towards a mutual orgasmic cliff and just when Madison thought they had reached their united pinnacle, their pace accelerated one last time and the fullness and depth of their connection brought shared cries and tears of abject ecstasy. At long last Madison's heart issued a wail that was both bereft yet hopeful, pained yet joyful, hurt but caring, lost but loving, all at the same time and then just as Madison began to lose her grip on Daniel's body and reality, they tumbled across the finish line together.

Daniel hissed through clenched teeth as his body tightened to a strained edge. His spine quivered like a bowstring and his labored breath halted for a moment of agonized hesitation. Nearly mad with desire and urgency, Madison's body bore down on him, and willed Daniel forward with her eyes until, at last, unable to contain himself for one more tortured moment, Daniel uttered a mournfully ecstatic cry and all the tension in him exploded into Madison. His body thundered, once, twice, three times, deep inside her and Madison sobbed out relieved pleasure as Daniel's essence, thick and sticky, filled her. Simultaneously, a rip tide of their mutual emotion and sensation swept aside Madison's doubt and shame and guilt as her body contracted and exploded outward with a keening, cathartic howl. Time halted in a beautiful singularity and as they toppled over the event horizon of orgasmic chaos, Daniel and Madison's lips met, gently and sweetly, as all of Daniel poured into Madison and all of Madison poured over Daniel like a nectar of understanding and healing.

Gradually their eternity together ebbed. Breathless and amazed they clung to each other and the ragged vestiges of what they had experienced. For the first time since the party, a physically tired Madison felt peace and wholeness, as if guilty chains had fallen from her arms and legs. Spent with effort and passion, Daniel body trembled in her embrace, while his breath returned in hissed and sighed irregular gasps of exhaustion. Then, with a weary sob, Daniel lay his forehead against Madison's shoulder.

"I love you!" he blurted between ragged breaths. "I love you!"

Madison placed her lips to his ear.

"I love you too, Daniel. I love you so much."

Warm tears from Daniel's eyes trickled down Madison's back. She braced him with her body and heart and shushed gently in his ear until he could collect enough of himself to lean back and gaze into her eyes. Daniel's green eyes were clear and bright with tears and her heart swelled with love for him.

"I'm scared, Madison."

Presently, Daniel's body began to shake under the dual strain of their shared weight and shared emotions. Madison squeezed him close to comfort and anchor him.

"I thought I'd lost you," Daniel whispered.

"I'm here," Madison cooed to him as she stroked his back. "Welcome home."

"I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough for you." whispered Daniel miserably.

Madison's heart glowed with sympathy and she steadied him with her kiss.

"Shhhhhhh. You're good enough." she told him. "You're good enough. You're so good. You're everything I could ever want or need. I promise."

Daniel's body sagged in relief.

"I need to sit down," he panted.

Madison felt Daniel's body leave hers and the sense of disunion frightened her. He gently pulled against her embrace, but Madison could not let him go. Not yet.

"Promise me," she whispered to him with a tiny fright in her voice. "Promise me you stay with me."

"I promise," Daniel assured her. "Always."

Madison released Daniel and his knees buckled. After a sideways step he collapsed to a seat on the floor and rested his head against the kitchen cabinets. While his emotions ebbed, Daniel's presence shrank back inside him and Madison watched as there on the floor of their home her sweet, quiet Daniel returned, heaved another deep sob from his chest and began to shake violently. Madison stepped down from the countertop, and placed a steadying hand on his shoulder.

"I'm cold," Daniel whispered.

Immediately Madison went to her knees next to him. She felt the cold chill that had settled on his skin, so she wrapped him with her body to protect him with her warmth. Daniel tried to hide his eyes, but she gently turned his face to hers. His gaze was dusky green with fear and love.

"How did you know...?" Daniel asked her in a frightened voice.

"I listened," Madison whispered comfort to him. "I listened."

Daniel shivered against her. He stuttered a sigh, vulnerable and open in Madison's arms and her heart thumped empathy in her chest.

"I knew it," he whispered back. "I knew you were the one ever since that night in the garden. Somehow I knew it."

Madison sobbed in realization. Daniel believed in her when they kissed that magical night in the garden. He had lost that belief and it nearly broke both their hearts, but now, like magic, he believed in her again. Daniel, kind, sweet Daniel, was hers again, fully and completely this time, and he was home with her, safe and sound, and he loved her! She had reached him! She could feel it from his skin and see it in his eyes, green and calm as the sea after a storm. Madison's head swam with relief and joy.

"I could never believe that anyone could love me," Daniel confessed in the dark. "Until I found you."

Madison nodded her head gratefully and kissed him gently to reassure him.

"I love you, Daniel."

Daniel smiled a broad, open and joyful smile for her and her alone, and put his hand on his heart.

"I felt that" he smiled. "I felt that right here."

And Madison burst into tears.

*****

The rest of the weekend was, in equal parts, sweet and uncomfortable. The sweat part was that the quietly, rigid separation they had lived until then was gone, replaced by gentle togetherness. The uncomfortable part was that in its place was a mess of raw emotions and loose ends. Obviously they had a lot of work to do to rebuild their relationship and in the light of a new day, Madison worried just what would happen next. An aura of awkward anticipation settled, but ultimately it was not as bad as Madison feared.

While Friday night's exertions didn't cure the trouble between them, it did provide an open door for the two of them to get closer, and that meant some open and honest, and quite frankly, hard conversations between Madison and Daniel and those conversations forced Madison to face some difficult truths about her previous treatment of their relationship and of Daniel. With the barrier of Daniel's reticence gone, Madison got to hear about how she had previously made him feel and she was not at all comfortable with the portrait it painted. While she had expected Daniel to be upset, hurt and angry about the night of the party, he also expressed the pain of crippling anxiety born of a feeling of inadequacy she hadn't anticipated from him, and it caused Madison to weep in abject misery with the realization that she had played a part in that. However, no matter how painful that expression was to hear, it was for the best as it would spur Madison to change her approach to their relationship.

For his part, Daniel listened to Madison's concerns and worries about their relationship as well. Chief among them was Daniel's previous refusal to express himself, so while the conversations were difficult for them both, it felt fair. Daniel promised to be less insular and secretive, which alleviated a lot of Madison's fears and worries.

One such conversation, which Madison had not enjoyed at all, happened that very night. Daniel was finally home and in their bed with her. However, Madison anticipated that they would probably make love again, so she came clean and told Daniel she had stopped her birth control pill regimen in an attempt to get pregnant. As Cassidy had predicted, admission met with some disapproval and Friday evening's sexual activity came to an awkward halt for a bit.