A New Adventure Every Day Pt. 05

"Sorry, Roy," I reply as Meg and I separate, "I hope we weren't being inappropriate."

"Talk to my son about being inappropriate with his boyfriend; I've walked in on them a few times snogging on the sofa," he smiles. "I think I'm just about used to it now. Sorry, I just wanted to get Janice and Tina some more wine." He moves past and refills the two wine glasses he's carrying before grabbing a can of bitter and then leaving the kitchen. On his way out he passes Ruth as she enters. I remember the lager I was supposed to take to Sally and belatedly reach down to pull one from the bucket of water and ice by the table in which it was chilling.

"How's Sally?" I ask.

"She's okay, more or less. She'll be down in a minute. Have you told Meg?" I nod. "I can't believe I didn't realize she was gay," she shakes her head, "but then I missed you too, didn't I?"

"Hey, Ruth, even I didn't notice I was gay, so don't give yourself a hard time about me. Has Sally been in any relationships?"

"A few, when she was younger, I think. The occasional one night stand or holiday affair since then. Oh shit, I shouldn't be telling you this stuff; she should, if she wants to. Sorry, Sam, I'm trying to be so cool and together about you coming out but... I feel I just don't know you anymore."

"Ruth, I'm me, still me... just... me but, I don't know, not all bottled up and trying to be what people expect. I can't say I'm not different but it's... I don't know..."

"I know," interjects Meg. "Look, a tiger in a cage is still a tiger but let that tiger out of the cage and into the wild and it becomes so much more, well, tigery! Is that a word, tigery?"

"It is now!" I laugh. "Yes, Ruth, Meg's right: I'm just more me than I was."

"So... I'm sorry, but I need to ask this: so when you look at me do you look at me differently, see me sexually? All those time I held you when Steve left and your job went bad, was there ever a time you were, I don't know..."

"Aroused? Attracted to you? No, Ruth, there honestly wasn't. I was, however, immensely grateful that I had such a wonderful, caring and supportive friend. Do I look at you differently now? I... er, well I'm probably a little more aware of you physically than I was." I can see she's not happy about this. "Let me ask you this: when you see Roy, are you ever aware of him sexually?"

"Well, I suppose sometimes... he is a man after all, but he's just a friend; I'd never, ever do anything!"

"Of course you wouldn't and it's just the same for me with you; you are my friend, a very wonderful friend that I don't want to lose, but you are not, and never will be, my lover."

"Thank you Sam, what you said helps. I can talk to Tom now. I think he has been wondering the same thing and possibly whether I have feelings for you in that way."

"I'm really sorry, Ruth, I seem to have turned your house into an emotional minefield this evening."

"No, Sam, don't apologise. We should all feel flattered that you wanted to tell us. Right, I need to tell my husband to get off his arse and start the barbecue or it'll be dark before we eat."

Gradually the evening settles down. Sally re-joins the group and, possibly due to the alcohol as much as anything, everyone relaxes. Everyone except Tina, that is, who still seems cynical about me being gay and, almost immediately after eating, she makes her apologies and leaves early. Though this is disappointing, her departure further lightens the mood.

As twilight falls the air cools. Candles are lit and Ruth brings out shawls and blankets against the slight chill, Meg and I are side by side sharing the same blanket as the conversation ebbs and flows. Towards the end Sally, who is sitting next to me on my right, feels able to tell the others about her sexuality, even that she 'had a bit of a crush on Sam' when she first came to work at the school. "I don't know if I'm ready to be out completely yet but I wanted you all to know now. I think I've realized that I want to be in a relationship and I can't do that if I can't admit that I'm a lesbian." She looks over at Meg and me. "Not unless you have a Meg arrive in your life, eh Sammy?" she teases gently.

"Very true!" I agree, raising my glass and managing to slop wine over my hand and splash her. I realise that I've drunk far too much to drive. "Oops, sorry Sally. Meg, I think we'll need to call a cab to get to the hotel."

"Sam, you are more than welcome to stay, as I told you," Ruth tells us.

"No, no, no, we couldn't impose," I reply.

"Nonsense, it's no imposition. Meg, can you persuade your stubborn girlfriend to accept a friend's hospitality?"

"I could try. It might be easier just to fill up her glass and I'll just take her up to bed later when she's drunk. It wouldn't be the first time I've put her to bed in that state!"

"Hey," I complain, "that's personal!"

"When did that happen, Meg? Sam always used to be careful with the amount she drank," asks Janet I surprise.

Meg looks at me grinning. "Shall I tell them or will you?" she asks me.

"Okay, I will," and I briefly relate the tale of our first afternoon and evening. "The next morning I woke up in bed with a raging hangover and wearing only my panties but with no recollection of how I got there. Then I find Meg wearing just my bathrobe who admits that she undressed me and put me to bed and, what was it, 'may have cuddled me... a bit!'" The others laugh and I notice Sally smiling.

"Meg," Sally says softly, as she leans towards us "you deserve to be with the girl you fell in love with. You and Sam belong together." With those five words she lets me go, freeing herself to find her own love and blessing Meg and me at the same time. Her face is very close to mine so I move in and kiss the corner of her mouth.

"Thank you Sally, that means such a lot coming from you." I tell her.

Continued in Part 6...