Adventure of the Incidental Ogle

"We make a deal with the Justice guys for a reward cut of the money. We deliver the diamonds to Pig, he gets busted with them when he leaves the rendezvous."

"But he'll kill us as soon as he has the diamonds," she pointed out. "Two million plus is worth no witnesses."

"Okay, a couple of extras, then," I temporized. "What did you qualify marksman?"

"Expert," she frowned. "Rifle, Pistol, Machine gun, SMG. All four. Why?"

"I think I love you," I told her and she smiled. "I'll deliver the diamonds and a threat to leave us alone. You'll cover me from a safe distance. Pig will accept the standoff, take the diamonds and go. Then he gets busted."

"Okay, that could work," she nodded. "So... I tell Pig we found them and we're going to go get them, and then we'll arrange a meet. Interested in a vacation?"

"To the Caymans with you?" I smiled. "You bet your sweet ass!"

"That's one you haven't done, yet," she laughed -- and started me thinking.

* * * * *

Chuck put me in touch with a guy from the Treasury department and I explained our idea. He said he'd need to coordinate with Homeland Security and the FBI, but it was viable. He did point out that we weren't going to get the diamonds back into the U.S. without assistance.

We arranged a sit-down meeting for me and Anne at the closest FBI field office. We came out of it with a deal to courier a diplomatic pouch (actually a small trunk) to the American Consulate, and to bring it back. We were assigned a Diplomatic Courier from the State Department to handle the actual transfer, once Anne acquired the diamonds. We were reminded that firearms, and most weapons, were illegal without a special permit.

Passports ready, no visas required, we packed for a vacation.

"You know what's nice about the Caymans?" I asked her.

"No casinos?" she guessed.

"Well, yes, and bars if you want them, but I was thinking..."

"SCUBA!" we both said together. "Have you got your cert?" I added.

"NAUI and PADI Master, and yes," she smiled.

"Ditto." Just one more reason to fall in love with this woman.

Without getting into too much of a travelogue, we sent a message to Pig that we'd be gone for a week, getting his "stuff" and we'd set up a meet once we were successful. Anne made sure to point out that her neighbor (me) was helping her and not to even think about screwing with either house while we were gone because we'd secured them. That wasn't strictly true about my house, but I did have a silent alarm to the police and fire, and very sensitive motion and imaging sensors. Her place came with armed guards.

We flew into George Town and got settled in our hotel, then scoped out the place. It was tourist trap city, but friendly and mostly, I wanted to get in dive time. So did Anne. But we did the sensible thing and after a light dinner, we went back to the hotel and fucked.

The next morning, we went to the bank to be sure she could access the safety deposit box. It took a supervisor to review her proof of ownership and add her to the signature card, but they eventually did it. Anne noted that there was one other name on the card besides Lawrence, and it wasn't her. We took a look in the box and discovered a number of things, besides the diamonds, that we really wanted to have back at her house. Some were going to have to go the diplomatic courier route with the diamonds. Some we could take back with us. We decided to let everything sit and go enjoy ourselves.

USS Kittiwake, Babylon, Stingray City, Ghost Mountain... all excellent, excellent dives, especially when we found a tour operator that didn't mind naked diving. Beautiful sunrises, beautiful sunsets, beautiful starry nights wrapped in each other's arms on the veranda of our villa. Anne was the one that picked the Beachfront Villa at the Caribbean Club on 7 Mile Beach. In the future, she gets to pick all the hotels.

There was something amazing about having her legs wrapped around me while I rocked gently deep within her and we could hear the surf and the sound of the wind in the trees, and those damned coqui frogs and cicadas! I swear, we went back inside and finished screwing with the doors closed, those buggers were so loud.

Anyway, at the end of our week there, we went to the bank, emptied the lockbox into Anne's gigantic purse and headed straight for the Consulate. My buddy Chuck was there, along with the Diplomatic Courier, a guy named Harrison. We showed them what we wanted couriered, they agreed with two exceptions which they confiscated... I'm not getting into the specifics... and we set up a rendezvous at the FBI office back in the States. They also agreed, in principle, with my idea of how to take down Pig.

Anne and I had a boring trip back, unfortunately. I'd thought about trying the Mile-High Club routine with her but the lavatories were a bit small for two people and it wasn't a night flight. We settled for screwing in the Admiral's Club during our layover in Miami.

We got back to find out that Pig's people had been nosing around. Anne's security personnel reported a couple of skulkers who didn't try to get close to the house and my video surveillance showed a couple of people, male by the looks of it, who were checking out my property but not stupid enough to try to get into the house. We got hold of the law enforcement people and met with them at the FBI office.

To keep Anne and myself out of any more legal entanglements than necessary, the LEO's would stake out my place, I would tell Mr. Porkus to meet me on my beach for the transfer, one bodyguard only, and I'd give him the diamonds. After he left my property and was on the highway, the cops would bust him. They were going to hit him with every RICO, trafficking and tax evasion charge they could come up with. If he tried to implicate me or Anne, they'd basically do an immunity deal. I didn't bother telling them about my plans for backup for the exchange. All they needed to know was that he was leaving my place with the diamonds.

There were some by-the-book assholes at the meeting, but they were backed off by the Justice and Treasury people who wanted Lester really, really bad and figured he'd be spooked off by anyone other than Anne. And friend.

"You guys really need to stay off my property and stay invisible," I told them. "There's several places on the other side of the highway where you can hide vehicles. I'm willing to put in eavesdropping equipment and a relay in my house, but I don't want any bugs or wires. Just in case Pig has sophisticated debugging equipment."

They weren't happy about the conditions, but it was the best shot they were going to get, so they went along with me.

I went over the plan with Anne that night as we lay in her bed, "docked" and just petting.

"God, I'm glad you were a horny, perverted old man," she sighed after one of her mini-cums, where she just lay there and let it wash through her.

"Were?" I teased.

"Are," she corrected. "But I mean, as proper as you are in how you deal with people, I'm glad you stopped to video me jilling off."

"You were too beautiful to pass up," I told her, and I meant it. She wiggled her ass back into my crotch, forcing my cock deeper into her. I moaned, because... well, it was just that good.

"I like vacations with you," she told me. "I'd like to try some more, where we aren't recovering stolen diamonds. What do you think of Bora Bora?"

"I like Tikehau better," I teased.

"Tikehau is for honeymooners," she told me with a straight face. "Great diving, though."

"Of all kinds, muff and otherwise," I agreed. "Wait a minute! Are you suggesting...?" I couldn't help myself. The look on her face was priceless. Or, the first one was, anyway. The look of surprise, ready for a quick denial. The second look, however, was a lot more serious and thoughtful, and was giving me second thoughts about my teasing.

"That's not a bad idea..." she drawled and somehow I knew she was taking the idea seriously. "I think I'd want a few more laps around the test drive track, though, if you don't mind..."

"What kind of laps?" I was curious.

"Well, we've dated some, and done some serious getting to know each other, and we've had our first joint vacation..." she ticked off on her fingers. "No fights, yet, though. There's the living together, and picking out the furniture, and merging our music collections..." She was teasing me, and I knew it, but I didn't care.

"True," I acknowledged. "Nor have you invaded my man cave with an eye to making it more efficient." She raised an eyebrow.

"Wife Number One," I explained. She nodded.

"And you haven't tossed out my favorite pair of grease-stained jeans just because they were stiff enough to get up and walk around on their own," I offered. To that raised eyebrow, she got "Wife Number Two." I got a knowing smile from her.

"Hmmm," she added. "And you haven't torn out my carefully cultivated Wild and Ornamental Grass Prairie because it was in the way of where you wanted to run the walkway to the pool."

"I presume he thought they were weeds?" I ventured.

"Something like that," she smiled. "As opposed to his Weed which you can still find scattered around the woods, thriving."

"But my dear..." I put on a heavily affected British accent, "useful items, such as clothing and rope, are made from hemp!"

She just sniggered and rotated her wonderfully hot pussy that was then sheathing my very close to losing it cock.

"Anne, sweetheart, you keep that up and we'll be done for the night in short order," I told her.

"Done for awhile," she corrected me, "but I doubt for the night. You've got amazing stamina and recovery for a guy in his sixties." And then she got serious about taking her pleasure.

Since she was well impaled on me with her back to me, she reached between her legs and started diddling her clit while she ground up and down and around on me. I'm big enough that she had to stretch a bit to accommodate me, and that made her feel like a hot, wet, tight velvet furnace. She was pushing all my buttons and I had to struggle to wait for her to get off. She did, though, and I was right there with her.

"Oh, fuck, Jack!" she moaned and the now familiar sound let me know she was close. I reached my hands around in front and held her tits, rolling her nipples between my thumbs and fingers. It was exactly what she needed to explode.

"Oh! Fuck! Yes, Jack, yes! Fuck! Yes, just like that! Oh, fuck! I'm gonna... you're gonna make me... oh, Fuck! Cumming!!!"

I couldn't hold back as she clamped down on me and pulsed, hard.

"Oh, fuck!... I can't hold it... I... oh, fuck! Cumming!" I went over deep within her, my balls pulled up and emptying their hot load into her hot, smooth pussy. Her cunt seemed to have a way of just milking me, making me keep on cumming, getting aftershocks even after the main part was spent. She was, in a word, fucking amazing!

We finally collapsed, exhausted, and decided that actually getting some sleep might be a good idea. But she wouldn't let me pull out of her. She insisted that I stay right where I was until I fell out "from natural causes." Who was I to argue? We fell asleep docked.

* * * * *

Two days before our scheduled meet with Pig, Anne showed up at my place to set up her "nest"... the spot where she and her lasered and scoped Remington 700 were going to be sitting during my encounter with the bad guys. Okay, I was impressed. I was even more impressed when the Ghillie suit came out. When she pulled out the suppressor, I realized she was taking this way seriously.

Then she put the suppressor back.

"Don't need it," she told my questioning look. "If I have to shoot somebody, everybody's going to know about it, anyway. And besides, I'll be recording video of the whole encounter. You've got some really nice, tall evergreens overlooking the beach. I'll set up in one of them." She then headed off into my woods. I intentionally didn't want to know which tree she was in... much harder to accidentally give it away.

Later that afternoon, as we were lying in my bed for the first time, she cuddled up and asked, "is it weird having me sharing your space... and your wives' space... like, I'm trespassing or something?"

"You're not trespassing," I reassured her. "You're right where you're supposed to be. This was a vacation home until after Julie passed. I turned it into my primary residence about the time I retired from the CIA. My balling buddies have shared this bed, but I don't see any conflict there. So no, it's not weird."

"You've got a nice place..." she told me.

"Says the woman who has a hundred acres and a mansion on the lake," I teased. She took me seriously.

"A hundred acres and a mansion she inherited from an Asshole who abused her," she responded. "Not a great consolation prize. Except when you're there."

"And speaking of being there," she went on after a moment, "tomorrow, plan on spending the night with me, then driving me back here in the morning, before the meet. Pig will probably have the place under surveillance, but I doubt he's stupid enough to put someone on your property without an invitation. I'll just take a mid-morning walk in the woods."

"Sounds fine with me," I smiled. "What are we doing tonight?"

"Oh, I don't know..." she told me with a straight face. "Parcheesi, maybe?" When I gave her my best skeptical What??? expression, she added, "Strip Parcheesi?"

"How the hell do you play Strip Parcheesi?" I asked in my best fake serious voice.

"I don't know," she told me. "I'll make it up as we go along. It starts with you taking off all your clothes." Then she laughed. "Of course, at that point, forget the Parcheesi!"

We ended up driving into Tony's restaurant for dinner, then back to mine for some slow, sweet lovemaking, and a good night's sleep. Morning had her driving back to her place. I checked my security monitoring, making sure everything was functional, then sent an email to an inconspicuous address, indicating all was in readiness for a noon meeting on the beach. I iterated the lack of interference aspect and told them they would get a text message on the number they'd given me as soon as Pig and company had left my property.

I expected the unsavories to park near the creek just south of my place, follow it to the beach and walk up the beach to where I'd be waiting for them. No weapons, no backup (cough, cough)... just a bag of diamonds. If they played nice, they'd leave intact and with the diamonds. I was fervently hoping that Anne wouldn't be needed, except to send the text that they'd gone.

I had everything as ready as I thought I could get it... including putting the diamonds in my big Liberty Fat Boy safe. The place would be crawling with cops before they ever got that bugger open! A quick shower, a change of clothes, an extra change in an overnight bag and I was on my way to Nirvana. I'd decided that's what her place should be called.

I got there to be told she was down on the beach, expecting me. When I made my way down there, I found she had a small fire going and was getting ready to do some grilling. She was wearing some kind of sarong thing that wrapped around her marvelous hips, rippling in the slight breeze, naked otherwise. Her nipples were standing way the hell out. She looked like some kind of tropical goddess... not that I was prejudiced or anything.

"Jesus, you really love showing off!" I commented as I approached.

"For an appreciative audient, such as yourself, definitely!" she smiled, effectively making her the focus of my world. I clapped my hands together, once.

To her confused look, I told her "an applaud from the audient." That got a big grin.

"You prefer brats or burgers?" she asked, opening a cooler and looking inside.

"Both?" I asked. Again, she laughed.

"Now why didn't I expect that?" she asked. "I've got both, and buns for them, and condiments, and some rabbit food to nourish your Neanderthal side while it's distracted by the meat."

I moved up next to her and put my arms around her from behind, low, around her waist, and hugged her to me. "You better be careful," I told her softly, bending over and tickling her ear with my beard. "There might be some serious falling in love going around..."

"Too late," she told me, then stood up and moved my hands from her waist to her breasts. "And God! I love the feel of your hands on me!" She waited a couple of moments before turning in my arms to face me, putting her arms around my neck. "You know, if we're not careful, the food's going to rot before we get around to eating it."

I was still back at "too late..." I had been talking about me falling in love with her. I hadn't even thought it possible from her side. I had figured she'd see me as a fun guy to have as a balling buddy. Not fall for. And now I had all kinds of tingles running around inside.

"Anne, just so I don't step in it big time," I asked, "are you saying you're falling for me?" I'm sure the tentative quality to my voice was obvious.

"No," she told me and I breathed a sigh of relief. "I've already fallen for you." So much for the relief.

"Jack, don't worry about that right now," she told me. "We'll work it out later. I think we've both fallen pretty hard. But we've got time. Let's get through tomorrow and Lester's pig shit, and then see where we are."

"Okay, deal," I decided. "About those brats..."

She didn't need a staff to cook for her. She was, at minimum, a Master Griller. The burgers and brats were cooked to perfection, the Dijon mustard, English piccalilli and Vidalia onions were perfect, I don't know what brioche is, but the buns were excellent, and she capped it all off with Heineken Special Export. And she even had lettuce and tomato for the burgers. I think that's what she was calling the rabbit food.

We chowed down until we were full, then lazied around while it settled, taking in the sunset and not talking much. I was lying back against a log with her leaning back, in front of me, when my cell chirped. I dislodged her a bit with a "Sorry..." and fished it out of my pocket. There are very few people who have my cell number.

I looked at the Caller ID and it was Unknown Name, Unknown Number. Lovely. I had a good idea who was on the other end and I really considered letting it go to voicemail. But something in my head told me I should answer it.

"Yeah?" I definitely didn't sound happy.

"You gonna be there?" a wheezy voice asked from the other end.

"Yeah, Lester, I'm going to be there. It's my house, for fuck's sake. I'll be standing on my beach at noon, in the nice wide open, where I can see you coming. I'll have 'em with me and if you play nice, we exchange pleasantries and you walk away with them. You get to bring one goon and that's it. I'll know if you put someone else on my property, believe me. And it won't be pleasant."

"Don't try to get cute, Bub," he told me. "I don't like cute."

"Oh, I won't be getting cute, Lester. I'm going to do exactly what I say I'm going to do. Let's see how good you are at it, when two million in high-density carbon is on the line." I hung up on him. Anne was watching me carefully.

"You're going to piss him off," she said quietly.

"I hope so," I told her. "Pissed people make mistakes. He isn't going to follow the rules. He'll have one bozo with him, definitely. Armed, certainly. He'll be your problem, if he gets creative. I'm going to have a clunky, obvious old hearing aid on. I'm an old man, after all. You keep me apprised of what you can see, both from your perch and from the video monitors relayed to your phone. You'll be able to hear and record my conversation with him. Blustering egomaniacs like Pig don't scare me. Their collective stupidity does. Which is why we're stacking the deck."