Ashton Hill Valentines

"I know you're not stupid," he said, taking a slow step toward her again, "Because you carry capsicum spray in your purse and you're not afraid to use it. I know, because you left the pub through the front door rather than the side into a dark laneway, and because even now you have your cell phone in your hand," he glanced down at the hand she had thrust into her jeans pocket. "You're ready to call for help the moment you feel threatened." He took another step toward her, grateful that she didn't back away. "You're not stupid, but you're taking a big risk walking home alone at this time of night."

"We live in Ashton Hill; people here don't even lock their doors at night. I'm perfectly safe," she said in a tired voice.

"Bad things happen in every town, no matter how safe or how small," he said. "I'll walk you home," he said without the commanding tone in his voice, hoping Lara wouldn't argue this time.

"Letting a man I barely know, who knows a hundred ways to kill another human, walk me home seems way riskier to me," she said, but her eyes danced as she said it, teasing him.

"You're safe with me," he assured her, closing the distance between them and standing so close she had to raise her head to look up at him.

"I'm not so sure about that," she said quietly, feeling her body react to Jack's closeness.

"Are you afraid of me, Lara?" he asked only half joking.

"No, but I'm smart enough not to accept any offer from someone just home for a visit, and a good time," she said with a small laugh.

"I only want to walk you home," he tried not to sound wounded by her words, he wasn't that sort of guy. That was Harry's domain.

"Are you sure about that?" she raised an eyebrow at him.

"No, that's not all I want, but it's what I'll settle for. Let me walk you home, Lara," he said honestly, holding her gaze and smiling softly.

'Good grief, how was she supposed to resist that?' She asked herself. It wasn't the butterflies in her stomach or the heat she felt being so close to him that made her ache, it was his self-depreciating smile that had her considering saying yes to his offer to walk her home.

"And why should I believe that?" she asked, crossing her arms and trying to stay strong in the face of all the tall, honest, funny yumminess standing in front of her. Jack took a moment, his eyes watching her in that intense way of his making her body heat all the more.

"Why wouldn't you, given that I don't say anything I don't mean?" he shrugged. Lara had asked him to prove himself, and he had. "Nothing is going to happen that you don't want to happen. You can trust me."

And there it was, he was asking her to trust him. It was easy to ask for, but much, much harder to give. To give him credit, he was doing so well at the 'I'm one of the good guys' routine that she could almost believe it. What would it hurt? It was just a walk at three in the morning through dimly lit streets festooned with hearts and flowers. Yes, he made her nervous, but not in a serial killer 'I'm going to chop you up and hide the pieces in people's gardens' way. He made her nervous on a more basic elemental, sexual way, and she'd worked too hard to get to where she was now to take a step backwards in her struggle to get her life back on track without a man to look after her and tell her what to do.

The problem was he made her want that. Made her remember how long it was since she had been touched or kissed by a man who desired her, even if only for her body. How long it had been since she felt someone enter the very core of her and make her explode in heavenly waves of sensation. Her mouth dried at the thought and the butterflies in her stomach turned into giant tiger moths.

"Nothing, I promise," he said into the silence, making her realise just how long she had been standing there looking at him.

"Alright," she finally agreed. "I have to warn you though, it's a fair way in the opposite direction to your mother's house. Are you sure you still want to walk me home?"

"Absolutely," he grinned.

"You didn't go to stay with your mother after the accident? Or want to stay in the city you were living in?" he asked, knowing her mother had moved away with a new boyfriend a few years ago.

"Mum offered, but I needed something familiar, and Ashton Hill fit the bill," she tried to explain why she had come here rather than invade her mother's new life with husband number three. Jack was watching her with that intense gaze again, and she knew he wanted more information. "I didn't want to be reminded of what I'd done or been willing to sacrifice for an asshole," she sighed. "My ex. That was his town, he had family there, and our friends were really his friends. I found that out when things started to go wrong, and once I finally left him there was nothing for me there, so I came home." She didn't know why she was telling him this, maybe because someone was finally listening, and he seemed interested in what she had to say.

"I'm sorry things didn't work out for you," Jack said quietly.

"Yeah, well, that's what happens when you get involved in that hedonistic world, they keep hunting the next big thing and collecting their trophies along the way," she gave a harsh laugh.

"He cheated on you?" he immediately understood what she was trying to say, and his fists clenched at his sides that her ex would treat her that way.

"It doesn't matter now, I left him," she picked up the pace, hardly believing she had told this man so much. The fact was that he'd left her for a young, more beautiful model who didn't have a dependency on amphetamines. She needed this walk to be over to get away from his tall, strong and, she had to admit, sexy presence now that she'd totally embarrassed herself.

They fell silent, and even though she had sped up he kept up with her easily, not that she should be surprised, he was ex SAS, after all. Her apartment came into sight, and she didn't slow her pace.

"This is me, thanks for the escort," she said with a lighter voice than how she felt and stepped up onto the first step.

"Your ex is an idiot!" Jack said gruffly, looking into her eyes. Being on the step while he stayed on the ground made her the perfect height.

"No argument from me, but I'm not sure you're the best person to judge Gordon, seeing as you never knew him," she said, taken aback by the gruffness of his comment.

"He let you go," Jack said with tenderness. "That's all I need to know."

Lara stared at him and had to check that her mouth wasn't hanging open. Why did he have to say that? Why did he have to keep looking at her as if she was something precious and wonderful? Why did he seem so earnest? She wanted to believe he truly did mean everything he said. She had to get away, she had to say goodnight before she lost what little control she still had over her reactions to this man. Then the unthinkable happened, and words just spilt out of her mouth.

"What if I wanted it to happen?" she blurted.

"What?" He frowned.

"You said nothing would happen that I didn't want to happen," she took a deep breath and licked her lips, hardly believing she was saying this. "What if I wanted it to happen?"

"What do you want to happen, Lara?" Jack asked, hardly believing what he was hearing and knowing he didn't want her to feel like she owed him anything.

"You walked me home," she accused, unable to answer his question directly. It was terrifying putting herself out there, and she didn't think she could open herself up to him even further, not without knowing for sure that he was feeling the same way. "You waited for me and walked me right to my door."

"What do you want, Lara?" he asked again, refusing to touch her until she told him that was what she wanted. She'd made it clear enough she didn't want that originally. What had changed? he wondered. "Tell me, and it's yours," he added.

At that moment she believed that if she asked him for the stars he would reach up and shake a few loose from the blanket of the sky. This was his fault, she wouldn't be out on the front step at three in the morning stuttering and stammering if he wasn't so stubborn and steady and, she had to admit, gorgeous. He made her question the things she believed unattainable, like finding a man she could count on, a true partner who wanted her for herself, not her looks, who would be there for her when she needed him. Fantasies, she scoffed. This was a dangerous, dangerous man who threatened to undo all the hard work she had put into being stronger and independent. Still, she couldn't deny the way her body was reacting to him. Maybe she could just have a taste of the forbidden fruit and remain untainted... maybe, she wouldn't know until she tried.

"I'm curious," she edged closer to him while staying on the step, and she felt him stiffen as her thigh brushed against his. She smiled softly, feeling as if she maintained control, and daringly placed her hands on his chest and ran them slowly up to his shoulders hearing his intake of breath. "Aren't you?" she asked in a husky voice.

"You don't owe me anything," he said in a stilted voice, reaching up to circle her wrists before her hands went around his neck and he wouldn't be able to stop himself from following through.

"This isn't payback for the escort home," she became defensive.

"What is it then? What do you want, Lara?" he sounded like a broken record, even to himself, but he wanted her to be sure. He didn't want her to blame the time or the moment or use any other excuse when they saw each other again after tonight.

"This," she paused. "Is either the worst idea I've had in a long time," she paused and tilted her head up to look into his eyes properly, "Or the best."

"It's not the worst," he allowed himself a small smile.

"No?" she asked softly, wondering what he was waiting for. She'd made the first, second and third move, and she'd be damned if she was going to make the last. If she did, she'd never know if this was what he wanted too or if this was all one-sided. Despite the look in his eyes and everything he said, she wasn't sure if this was more than just him doing his knight in shining armour routine and making sure she got home safely.

She could practically see him thinking and weighing the pros and cons, then preparing to deliver perfectly crafted words, as always. It was part of the game men and women played, she knew it, he knew it, and after her self-imposed celibacy for the last year and finally putting herself out there again in a moment of sheer insanity, tonight she wanted to push him to speak and pressed up against him. She saw his eyes widen and the heat they contained. His hands tightened on her wrist, but he didn't pull her closer, leaving the contact with her, showing that he was in control and not her. It only made her want to test that control even more. It made her want to be the woman to make him lose that control.

"What do you want, Jack? Tell me, and it's yours," she whispered huskily, repeating his words back to him.

Jack groaned and pulled her to him, unable to resist the temptation of her, but wary that this wouldn't last beyond the moment, and when he finally kissed her he wanted it to last. He slid his hands up her arms to the elbow and pulled her closer, slowly giving her every chance to resist, to stop where this was going if she wasn't sure.

The slow, purposeful movement almost drove Lara insane. She was about to give up and break her own self-imposed restraint and bring their lips together when he lowered his head and kissed her. It was a soft kiss, barely a brush of his lips against hers, teasing her, giving her barely a taste of what could be before it was gone, making her give a little whine of disappointment.

The whine was soft, and Jack barely heard it, but he repeated the soft almost kiss before settling his lips over hers in a tender closed mouth kiss, still giving her time to end it.

The move he made was slow and so gentle, it touched her heart, but it was a far cry from what she needed now. She wanted the heat of desire, craved the sharp burn of lust, not this sweet slow seduction that made her want to forget all her hard-earned lessons about protecting her heart. She determined not to give yet another man the upper hand just because he could kiss like a dream.

Jack felt the change in Lara a moment before she lifted her hands slightly to twine around his neck and rub against him. He was caught off guard when she ran her tongue over the crease between his closed lips. A shudder ran through him, and a groan rose from deep in his chest. The move was too much for him not to give in and lose a little of his carefully maintained control and take over the kiss. His hands dropped from her arms and skimmed down and around to her ass, cupping it and pulling her against him tightly as he groaned again.

This was much better, Lara thought briefly. Her breasts became heavy, and her nipples tightened, pressing to escape the tight confines of her bra, and she echoed his groan. His hands dug into her ass and he lifted her from her feet, walking the two steps to press her up against the door. The kiss turned almost feral as he pressed up against her, his hard body making her feel small and fragile as his hands skimmed her curves up to brush over her aching breasts.

Every inch of her, he wanted to touch and taste every inch of her, and as his hands brushed over her breasts, he felt her press back against him as if begging for more. He was so hard, and her rolling hips were only making the painful evidence of his desire worse. He wanted to take her here under the starlit sky; he didn't want to wait or go slow or even think about what would happen tomorrow anymore.

Lara ached to be reckless, to let him take her here and now against the front door and be damned with the consequences, but the tiny spark of her rational mind sung loudly. She had already made too many mistakes and gotten herself into too many messes. She'd come too far to be so careless and reckless now. The thought caused her to push lightly against his shoulders and, surprising both of them, he stopped immediately and took a step back, his eyes wide, his breathing ragged. She could still taste him on her lips, and she unconsciously ran her tongue along her bottom lip.

Jack tried to gain some equilibrium. She had stopped it. He stared at her trying to breathe again and saw her tongue snake out over her lip like a tantalising invitation. He went to reach for her again, but stopped himself, curling his outstretched hand into a loose fist and shoving it behind his back with the other one. He couldn't give into temptation and initiate another mind-blowing kiss, not when she had stopped it.

The resolve she had used to push him away crumbled almost immediately; and she knew that if he asked she would invite him in, but only if he asked. Only if he made the choice she was too afraid to make for herself.

Jack swore under his breath as he watched indecision ripple over her face. He believed he could talk his way into her apartment and her bed, but, just like their first kiss, he wanted her to be sure, and watching her now he knew she wasn't. He definitely did not want to be labelled as another mistake in her life. He wanted her to want whatever happened between them, want it at the moment, and then want more of it as time went on. He swore again as he took control of himself and the situation.

"I'll wait until you get inside," he said in a low, gravelly voice as if it caused him pain to say, then he nodded toward the door.

Lara turned and fumbled with the key before dashing inside and slamming the door shut behind her before she changed her mind or he changed his. From her front window, she saw him jog off down the street and let go of the breath she hadn't realised she'd been holding.

*****

Chapter 4

Jack ran into the last leg of his five-kilometre run. He had been surprised that Harry hadn't joined him this morning and wondered if he had found some company last night. He cursed at the thought. He was an idiot walking away from Lara last night, or, more to the point, running away from her last night. He'd seen it in her eyes, she would have let him in, would have let him kiss her like he had against the door, would have let him explore every inch of her body. God, he was an idiot! He could have fulfilled every teenage fantasy he had, plus a few he still had swirling around in his brain. He groaned and jogged faster trying to rid himself of the thought. Leaving her last night was the right thing to do, he knew it, but...

Jack was so caught up in his thoughts about the night before that he almost ran into the brick wall that was his brother before he saw him jog out of the shortcut and into the trail causing him to veer slightly to make room on the narrow track. He kept his steady pace as Harry fell into stride beside him. Usually he liked that his brother's constant chatter and joking fell away when it was just the two of them, and he was able to just run and think, but this morning he could have used the distraction.

He enjoyed the familiarity of the rainforest that was a feature of his hometown. His family lived in the north-east corner of this town known as Juliette Falls that backed onto the national park, and he had run here often before he left to explore the big wide world. He enjoyed running here now, but his brain just wouldn't let go of that fact that he'd been such an idiot and that the man running beside him would be going after Lara now as well. His brother hated to lose a challenge, and even if he had met another woman last night, he would still be pursuing the prized date with Lara Collingwood. The thought made him angry, and he sprinted the last five hundred meters back to his mother's house.

Jack wanted Lara to choose him. Not just in a contest against his brother, but really choose him. Still, why beat himself up when his brother would do it for him? He turned around once they were in the backyard and lifted his fists, dancing on the balls of his feet. He saw Harry grin and take a similar stance.

"You sure you want to do this, bro?" Harry gave him a wide grin. "You don't seem up to full strength this morning, you almost ran me over back there," he pointed out. "Did get your full dose of beauty sleep?" he teased.

"As if you could ever be as pretty as me," Jack chuckled and danced out of reach of a mean looking right hook but practically walk into the left Harry had aimed at his temple. He knew better than to let his brother's trash talk get to him, but he was still so wound up about his kiss with Lara and the fact that Harry would be doing his best to win the challenge. He had to get his head in the game or be annihilated by his brother. He feigned a grab, then swept low, knocking Harry's feet out from under him and landing him on his ass on the well-manicured lawn.

Harry rolled and came up fast, wrapping his arms around Jack's waist, trying to bring him down onto his back. They'd fought each other their entire lives and knew each other's strengths and weaknesses. Jack knew if Harry got him down on the ground it would be game over. He brought his elbow down on Harry's back hard. Harry grunted and sent two jabs into his side, he breathed through the pain and twisted out of his brother's hold and danced back on the balls of his feet as he eyed his brother.

"You left Kelly's early last night," Jack commented, noting that his brother looked happy and relaxed this morning.

"Places to go, women to do," Harry smirked, not taking his eyes off Jack as they danced around each other.

"Any particular woman?" Jack inquired, knowing that it wasn't Lara. He had been with Lara, he'd been the one to walk her home and kiss her. The image bloomed once again in his head. Harry hesitated, which was unusual for him, Jack noted, and pounced, shooting out a right hook that caught Harry's cheek, and just to add insult to injury gave the cheek a little love tap as he staggered back. "Whoever it was has messed with your game today."