Branded

She kissed him long and hard and looked at the ring. "It's beautiful." Sighing, and sliding her pants off, "Thank you. Oh, Jonah this is wonderful. We're going to do so many things together, go so many places, experience so many things...What the hell are you doing? I standing here with my britches off ready to wear you out and you're just fiddling around."

"Zoey. I don't know what the hell is going on, but my feet are numb, my legs and hands are getting numb and my legs just feel, I don't know, not right or something." He struggled to his feet. "I don't know? Maybe the altitude? Maybe a relapse of that stuff I had before. You know how I never, ever pass up an opportunity..."

"Don't I know it, horn dog."

"But I think I need to head down."

"Sure. Sure. Let's go. Does it hurt?"

"Some in my back, but mostly just numb and weak."

"It's down hill all the way, Hon. Won't take long at all and then we'll get you checked out. God, you're walking like some duck or something. Like you have a stick up your ass. Here, here's a stick you can use as a walking cane.

"No. Wait. Stop. Lie down. EMT time. Let me check you a minute. Cripes your heart is racing, you're panting, but your lungs sound clear. No cough. No swelling in your legs or arms. Pulses OK. Can you feel this?" She rubbed his feet through his boots. He shook his head. "What about your hands?"

"They just feel a little numb."

"Here follow my finger. EOM's fine. Can you see alright? No double vision or anything?" He shook his head. What the hell! She poked on his abdomen, chest, legs, back. "Shit. I don't know. Poison, sepsis, embolus? Must have slept through that lecture, but we need to get you down, Big Guy. You don't look so good."

She helped him up and they started to walk. She was scared. Scared for Jonah. She wished they could just run down the mountain and get to the hospital, but walking was becoming an issue. He was always so big and strong. Always the last guy to seem tired. Her rock. But now? "Here, give me your pack."

"That's better. Thanks, Zoey. I..."and he tripped and fell, scraping his palms on the loose rock. She gathered him up again and started stabilizing him as they walked. He became more and more unsteady as another hour passed. "Zoey. It's so weird. I'm wide awake, know what I want to do, but my legs feel like I just ran a hundred miles. And I can't really feel my feet at all. I don't know when they're hitting the ground."

"Just keep going. One step at a time. Concentrate on lifting one then placing it on the ground. Then the other. We're half way back. That's it. Let me help you. Damn, you're a friggin' horse. Next life, I'm going to fall in love with a little puny guy instead of a big lug like you. That's it you're doing great. Remember the little engine that could."

He laughed, but he wasn't doing alright. He kept falling. He had scrapes and cuts in his hands a face, arms and she was getting more and more frightened as he worsened. Despite his visible efforts and sweat running down his face he had a more difficult time getting up with each fall.

He got to the point he was lifting his leg using his thigh muscles then pivoting some and putting his foot down. Then the other side. One awkward step at a time. Slower and slower, panting harder and harder, now sweat soaked. He went down again. "Zoey, I'm sorry, but I don't think I can get up again. My legs are like jello."

"Shit! We can't stop here! You can't give up! We only have another mile or so. I can't drag your ass and there's nothing to make something I can drag you on. Please. Let's try to keep going."

He struggled up took three steps and fell again. "Time to ask for help, I guess. Call the 911 guys."

"Right! Good idea. They're probably just sitting on their asses waiting for something to do. You know Graham and Felix. They had the duty today. Shit, still no signal. I can't get a dial tone. Oh, Jonah. What should I do? What do you want me to do?"

"It's alright, Zoey. I'll be fine. What if you leave the packs, go down the hill and call from the parking lot. There's usually a signal there. I'll wait here and smell the flowers. Like Ferdinand. You know how I like to dawdle some times."

"You're full of bull, for sure. We're never supposed to leave the patient alone, especially if they're getting worse, right?"

He smiled at her. "Zoey! I'll be fine. Must be some screwy post viral thing or something. So take your time going down. If you get hurt we're both screwed."

"OK. OK. Sounds like a plan. I'll be back in two shakes of a lambs tail or ass or whatever. Here, give me a kiss, Jonah. Darn I love you. A hell of an engagement. 'What did you do when you said yes?' Stay right here, don't go away." He laughed.

"You're coming back, right?" She looked at him, realized he was kidding and kissed him again.

"Ass! Hey, if you didn't want to fool around all you had to do is say you weren't in the mood. No, wait, that's my line." Their eyes met and both laughed. He could see the concern and growing fear in every line on her face.

"Zoey?"

"Jonah, I have to go! What!"

"What kind of snacks did you bring?"

"Sometimes, Jonah Baxter...Why do I even love you. I should leave you here for the bears. Look, here comes one now. Be right back." She started running down the hill.

An hour later by the time the four wheelers reached him, all four limbs were weaker. "I don't know what's wrong, guys. Nothing wants to move. Nothing hurts, except kind of deep in my back sometimes, and even when I rest, I'm a little short of breath.

Onto the stretcher, oxygen, IV, AED hooked up to monitor his rhythm. Zoey kissed him again. "He looks worse, Graham. Much worse than an hour ago. We've gotta go." Turning to Jonah, "Hang in there, Baxter, we're on our way. It's gonna be bumpy. May shake some sense into you. Love you."

"And I love you. Remember, if anything happens to me, you inherit everything."

"You don't have anything, dick head."

"Oh, yeah, guess you're right. Well, it's the thought that counts."

"Great thought. Try this on. If you die on me, I'll kill you." He laughed. "Tally Ho, gentleman."

The ED drill for a deteriorating patient began. This was tougher. They all knew and like Jonah. Careful history, blood, CT of head and spine, chest X-ray, plenty of probing. Three hours later another physician approached the bedside. "Uh, oh. Dr. James, good to see you, sir. So they called in Neurology? Must not be good."

"Hi, Jonah, Zoey. Don't know yet. I've got my suspicions, but I need to do a lumbar puncture and get some fluid to see if we can figure out why you're wrecking my Saturday."

"Sorry, Doc."

He smiled. "You know it's not a problem, Jonah. You have insurance, right?" He laughed, "Just kidding. Just walk through those doors and it just doesn't matter. Everyone gets the best. So you know how it works, on your side, curl up into a ball, numb your back and presto. Done. But first, the paperwork.

Two hours later. "Well, Jonah, I think we have a diagnosis. All your tests seem to indicate that you have Guillain-Barre Syndrome." Jonah's shoulders slumped and he seemed to collapse. 'You probably remember that it is a rare autoimmune disease where your body attacks your nerves and things stop working for a while. You're young and healthy, that's great. But the fact that it's progressing so quickly worries me. So, we need to admit you to intensive care and watch you very closely. Make sure you're breathing OK, your heart doesn't act up and all those sorts of things."

Looking seriously at Jonah, "Jonah, I'm concerned that you are going to be in for a very bumpy ride, but as you know most people do very well--after a while. At this point though, it's too early to tell much of anything. I mean we're not even 12 hours or so into it, right? Maybe this is as bad as it's going to get. Any questions?"

"No, Dr. James. Not looking forward to the what's ahead, but maybe it'll be a mild case."

"Maybe."

Jonah turned to Zoey who had lost all color. "Hon? You better sit down. You look worse than I do."

"But, Jonah? How can this be happening? How could it be happening to you? You're so strong and healthy and...Oh, God, Jonah. I just love you so much. You have to get better. Be strong. Be a fighter. Crap! I should call your folks. They need to know."

"Zoey! Three deep breaths. I'm fine, I'll be fine. People do well with this after it's done although it looks like summer session will be out for me. You need to do it, though. You need to go. No sense you just hovering over me.

"But please don't call my parents. Not yet. Let's see how I do. I love you. It'll be fine. Really. Better me than you right?" He smiled at her as she lunged and kissed him. Tears streaming down her face, still looking like she was in shock as they rolled him to the ICU.

But he didn't do well. His muscle weakness spread to his chest and he had a hard time breathing, his blood oxygen levels trended downward and he was wearing out trying to breathe enough. The strain and fatigue were clearly evident on his face. "The time has come, Jonah."

He nodded. "I think you're right, Dr. James. I'm wearing out trying so hard to breathe. Zoey, I love you. See you, in what Dr. James, three to seven days or something?"

"I'm hoping for just a couple, but we'll see. Remember, we'll wake you up everyday and see how you're doing."

"Zoey. Time to call my mom. Can you do that for me?"

"Absolutely." She stepped out, the nurses shut the glass doors, pulled the curtains and the anesthesia folks intubated him so a ventilator could do the breathing his muscles could no longer do.

Zoey was sobbing, panicked. Not about the call, but about about their future together. She counted on his strength, his stability, his joy of living. What if he didn't get better? What if he wasn't the same? 80% go back to normal or almost. But that meant 20% were never quite the same.

What if they couldn't hike or travel or do all the things she'd been planning and looking forward to? She told herself she had to be strong. Maybe Maggie would help her and give her the strength she needed to get through this. Someone had to help her. She needed someone to help her!

Zoey calmed herself and dialed the number. "Hello, Mrs. Baxter? This is Zoey Daniels. I'm Jonah's fiancée."

"Fiancée? I didn't even know he was engaged. Why didn't he tell me? Is he there? Can I talk to him?

Zoey was surprised that she didn't sound more excited. Most mothers..."Well, that's why I'm calling, uh..."

"Well anyway, congratulations, uh, that's terrific. You're the girl in the pictures he sends me?"

"Yes. I guess I am."

"Have you decided on a date yet?"

Still no excitement, almost disappointment. What was going on? "No, Mrs. Baxter, we haven't. He's sick. Very sick." She heard a gasp and the sound of tears on the other end.

Zoey lost it and started sobbing harder than Maggie, enough to be barely intelligible. She knew it was crazy. She was a medical professional, after all, but that was caring for strangers. This was Jonah.

"Mrs. Baxter, he asked me to marry him and I was so excited, I love him so much, but then...but then he got so weak...and now he's almost paralyzed and they just put him on the ventilator because he couldn't breathe anymore."

"Oh, dear God! Why didn't you call? How long has it been?"

"This is the fifth day since he got sick. He had diarrhea and stuff, then did fine and then fell apart. Oh, Mrs. Baxter, I don't know what I'll do if something happens to him."

Maggie switched to mother mode. "It's OK, Zoey. I'm sure the doctors are taking great care of him. He's a fighter, you know that. He'll get better. Take a few breaths. So what's wrong with him?"

"He's got Guillain-Barré syndrome."

"Well, that tells me about nothing."

"It's where his body attacks his nerves and things don't work right." She broke again. "Mrs. Baxter, he didn't want me to call sooner. I'm sorry. He thought he'd have a mild case, but he needs you. I need you. Please, can you come right away? You could stay at our place. And I'll pick you up at the airport and stuff. Please, Mrs. Baxter. He needs you."

'Our place,' Maggie thought. A whole lot more had been going on than her son had told her. But it made sense that they had been living together before they got engaged.

But this girl is a wreck, she's falling apart. Noel would never act that way. "I will check the flights and take the very next one. I'll keep you posted. Thanks for taking care of him...and congratulations. I'm excited for you both." She wasn't. Maybe it was just the stress of watching someone you love get sick, but...

She dialed another number. "Noel, Jonah has some syndrome. I don't know Gilligan B something. He's paralyzed and they just put him on a breathing machine." He heard a sharp intake of breath, then control and calm took over.

"Guillain-Barré syndrome?"

"Yes! Yes, that's it. Tell me all about it. I'm flying out to Colorado as soon as I can get a flight."

"I just had a patient with that when they pulled me to the rehab unit, so I know some about it. I need to ask you some questions, and if you don't know that's alright. And then we'll talk about it. But first, the big picture is that most people his age do just fine. So take a deep breath and relax a little bit. So, tell me what you know..."

"So, Mrs. B, again the big picture is that he should do fine. But there are four main things that sometimes make the course of the disease a little worse, not like he's going to die or anything, so don't worry about that, but things that mean he may, and again, it's just statistics and all that, may mean that he's going to take a while to get better. Those are age, rapid onset, ventilator within seven days and a history of diarrhea. He's got three of the four."

"So what's that mean for my baby, Noel."

"It means that the odds are it will take him a while to get better. But he WILL get better, Mrs. B. He's strong and never gives up. It'll just take a lot of rehab and physical therapy and stuff. But he's used to working out. So no big deal. And we can help him with all that." Although she knew it would likely be six months to a year...or more. Better not to share it all. "And besides, it's such a spooky disease, he may get better in no time."

"You said 'we', Noel."

Maggie heard a groan, "My mistake. I meant you and the girl in the pictures, along with all the physical therapists, occupational therapists and whoever else is needed. I'm sure I would just do more harm than good, but please keep me posted."

The next afternoon Maggie walked through the gates in Colorado and looked around for Zoey. There! There she was and she headed over to her. Taller than I thought. She looks so nervous and anxious. "Zoey?"

"Maggie?" She squeezed her into a hug. 'Lord, I'm so glad you're here. I..it's so hard seeing him just lying there on the bed, not moving. He's always so strong and healthy and, I don't know, so alive and now..." She collapsed into Maggie's arms and started to cry on her shoulder.

"There, there, Zoey. I talked to N...I mean I did a lot of reading about it and patients his age usually do just fine. So, here, here's a tissue, let's head off to the carousel and find my bag then head over to the hospital. Would that be alright?"

"Sure." She clung to Maggie's arm, found the bag and headed to the hospital. Zoey cried from time to time on the way and continued to tap her fingers on the steering wheel. Maggie tried to keep up a stream of chatter to try and calm Zoey down.

'Where did you meet? How long have you been seeing each other? How's school going? When does class start again?' No use. Maggie hoped it was just meeting her future mother in law that made her nervous, but she doubted it.

Zoey reminded her of one of those nervous horses that were ready to bolt at any sound. She thought back to the self confidence and calm that Noel had when she first walked up to her door after the fire and the way Maria described their first meeting.

She felt Jonah was making a mistake, but, there was nothing she could do about it. She needed to concentrate on getting her son well and it looked like she also had to keep Zoey from going off the deep end.

"OK, Maggie, he's in there. Now be ready, he has a ton of tubes and wires, and they're keeping him asleep while he has the breathing tube in. Well, most of the time anyway. They wake him up each morning to see if he can breathe on his own. He couldn't really do it this morning."

She turned and hugged Maggie again. "Thanks for being here, Maggie. I think it's going to help both of us." Maggie walked into the room holding her breath. Not so bad, just as Noel had described it.

"Oh, hi. You must be Mrs. Baxter, Jonah's mom."

"Maggie."

"Maggie it is. I'm Ariel. I'll be his day shift nurse today. Everything looks great. No irregular heart beats, feeding tube in the right spot and keeping him healthy. Your son has quite the physique on him, Maggie. He must work out a lot. Great to have a nice healthy person. Do you have any questions?"

"No, not really. I have a...friend in the medical field who filled me in and let me know what to expect. Basically though we're in a holding pattern right? Hopefully a few more days on the breathing machine then some improvement and a plateau for a while. But we don't know what the timing will be, right?"

"Your friend is right on. Here, I'm sorry, wash your hands with a squirt of that stuff on the wall and then you can touch him. We're keeping him asleep, but you're welcome to talk to him, touch him or whatever. Just watch out for my spider web of tubes and wires." She laughed, Maggie smiled. Zoey looked ready to run out screaming.

Instead of going to her son she turned and hugged Zoey. "Zoey. It'll be alright. He's strong. We just have to be patient. It may take longer than we'd like. Right, Ariel?" She nodded. "So why don't I sit with him for a bit and you go out and relax. May be good for you to go home and rest for a bit, you look kind of tired."

"Uh, yeah. Great idea. I'll be back in a few hours. Will that be alright?"

"Sure, Zoey. Whatever works for you. Take all the time you need. Get something to eat. And then maybe you can show me your apartment."

"Sure." She hugged Maggie, tears just below the surface. "That'd be great. Thanks for being here. Really." She left.

"Maggie, I don't know that girl well, but what she is doing worse than your son, I swear. She is so nervous and jumpy she makes me a wreck. She never calms down, never. She's an EMT for God's sake. She should be able to handle this. But, I guess we're all wired differently.

"This is your son's seventh day in the ICU, second day on the vent and she is worse now than before. Your son is doing fine, Maggie, really. His blood work and everything is right where it should be.

"It's going to take him a while to get better, maybe even a year or so, but he'll get better. He's going to need a lot of physical therapy, but I swear she's going to need psychotherapy, I'm sure of it. So if you would be patient and mother her some, deal?"

She smiled. Someone else had said 'deal.' "Deal. If she's going to be my future daughter-in-law....So, Ariel, how long have you been doing this?"

By the end of her second day in Colorado Maggie knew two things for sure. First, Zoey was driving her nuts. She was so nervous and anxious that Maggie spent all of her time caring for her and had no time for her son.

Secondly, this was NOT the girl Jonah should marry. She saw nothing but nightmares ahead if he did. Jonah being Jonah, he would never divorce her, but he'd never be truly happy in the long run either.

Only one thing to do, she picked up her phone and called. "Noel? Hi, Hon, how are you doing?"

"Great! I was off today so I helped Henry in the store waiting on customers. Mrs. Fernandez was in and bought that big chocolate cake for her son's birthday party. And then I baked for tomorrow as things slowed down a little. So how's Jonah? How are you? You sound...frazzled or something."