Susan Takes Charge Pt. 06

The short notice meant that Stavro only got the hundred bitchiest, crankiest, nothing-better-to-do-this-eveningest ones to come into the office and crowd onto the buses for the ride up to the Castle. He'd barely even had to use the incentive we were offering them that was now being unveiled by the kitchen staff.

"There will be pie."

Indeed, there was pie. Maria explained to the kitchen staff what was going to happen and how she wanted special desserts for the occasion, and that if any of them had any grievances with La Familia, that they were welcome to attend themselves. All they had to do was put in a little overtime making cream and pudding pies like we needed enough of them to stop an army of clowns from invading San Finzione. They were beyond happy to stay late and put in the extra work. The hardest part had been finding staff willing to take La Familia's abuse for the next couple hours with a straight face, knowing what was coming. The Thing DID help a little there, I admit.

Palace guards locked all of the doors out of the Banquet Hall except two; the one that the rest of my team would be making our escape through, and the one that The People of San Finzione were now crowding through, grabbing a couple drinks from the bar or a plate of their own from the buffet, and finding their own personal favorite San Finzione to corner and berate. I lost sight of Lucinda in the wave that surged toward her.

As my team made our way to our exit, the last group of people to come in before the other entrance was locked emerged. Their appearance was the... well, whipped cream on top of the pie.

"One last thing." I'd said. "One little 'Helen touch' for good measure: Invite the press."

Photographers began snapping pictures and reporters began taking notes on the various arguments going on around them. I listened to people complain about yappy dogs, mailmen who only deliver bills, kids listening to too much rock & roll these days, what the government is doing about GMO vaccines in the chemtrails, why Daftpunk is outlawed in San Finzione, and numerous problems with neighbor kids and fences; while I made my way to the rest of the group. The kitchen staff had thoughtfully provided a convenient trolley of pies for each of us to take as well. I stuck a finger in mine and tasted it. Chocolate crème, perfect. I walked back toward the crowd.

"Hey, Lucinda!" I called out. She turned her head in time for Sue to hurl it with all my strength and nail her in the face. I stepped back and gave the, not command, but rather, the order that the kitchen staff had been waiting to hear.

"FOOD FIGHT!!"

And with that, the kitchen staff and our group hurled their pies into the crowd. Others took note of just how many were available all around the room and ran over to grab their own. Photographers took pictures of Lucinda wiping the chocolate and whipped cream off her face whenever a pie didn't go whizzing by to block the shot. Maria seemed to be having the most fun. Apparently, there were a few members of La Familia who'd had a pie coming from her for a while. I took a few hits myself in the crossfire back to the door, but it was all worth it. The servants would have a lot of cleaning to do afterwards, but they too, would consider it worthwhile.

We left, locking the door behind us. In my head, Sue thanked me for making the plan come together.