The Law of Attraction Ch. 08

"Particularly in my line of work, I often find it hard to see people not seeing the obvious." Bill commented, "In Jamie you have already seen the 'impossible' manifest itself in front of your own eyes, and you know how much Jamie loves you, did you ever think what might happen if you just told her that you missed her dick and would like to see it again for a little while."

At that moment I was so happy that I threw my arms around Bill hugging him. "Thank you so much." I said, giving him a quick kiss on the mouth.

"Glad to be of service," Bill replied, "remember that with the Law of Attraction, everything is possible."

That evening though when I made my request to Jamie, however, things did not go nearly as well as I expected, at least not at first.

"Jamie," I said, as we lay in bed together.

"What is it my love," taking my tit out of her mouth for a moment in order to speak.

"I miss your dick," I stated as a simple truth.

"I know," Jamie replied, "but you love my pussy, that is obvious by the way you dote over it." And as she said this she took my finger and inserted it into her beautiful pussy which was very wet.

Unable to resist I pushed a second finger into her pussy joining the other and seeking out her G spot, causing Jamie to quickly catch her breath.

I wasn't to be deflected though so I continued with what I planned to say. "It's just that every so often I feel the need to have you hard inside me, your dick I mean."

Now Jamie was getting irritated, "Well it's gone now, and I am the woman I always wanted to be, that I always thought you wanted me to be." She finished accusingly, "I thought we both wanted the same thing."

Now for one of the very few times in her life Jamie was getting angry, "So what was all that about me needing to be a woman, now it just looks like you are confused."

Jamie continued with venom, "At first I didn't know that my true desire was to be a woman and fought against it, but, with your help I came to accept my destiny, and now you want my dick back, you must be really screwed up.

Well I've got news for you, I love being a woman, no matter what you might want me to be, I love being a mother, and I love that I was pregnant with you, and I wouldn't change that for anything."

Now tears were running freely down my face as I felt my Jamie's pain, desperately I tried to explain what I meant. "Even before you were a woman to me, always, before you had a pussy I could only think of you as a woman, even back when you looked like a man, inside you were always a woman, I am only saying I miss having your dick so deep inside me, I never meant to imply I didn't want you to be a woman."

"No," Jamie replied scathingly, "Just not a true woman, but rather a freak, a chic with a dick." At this, for the first time ever, Jamie turned away from me and refused to let me touch her.

That night I could not sleep and all night I gently sobbed, how could I hurt so much the woman I loved more than life itself?

The following day, I called up Bill and told him that I needed to talk to him urgently. We agreed to meet in the Starbucks down the road, and after I had dropped the kids off at the crèche I walked into the Starbucks obviously distraught.

As I walked up to Bill, he said, "Let me guess, Jamie spurned you."

I had come to Bill to ask what I could do, and now it turned out that he had know what would happen, I looked at him with pure hate, and this time unlike the previous day I didn't hold back. I slapped him hard across the face saying, "I fucking love Jamie, and I would never knowingly do anything to hurt her."

As I said this, I remembered the way I had fucked her brutally in the ass with a strapon in order to expel the demons of my childhood, never knowingly do anything to hurt her again I corrected myself. But even that time Jamie had continued to have faith in me, believing I needed to work something out in my mind. This time however she felt like I had thrown everything she had ever done for me or with me, back in her face.

Now Bill rubbing his jaw said, "Well I guess I deserved that."

Regaining some of my composure but not feeling any less hate towards Bill, I said, "If I had known how Jamie would react I would never have told her how much I wanted to have her dick inside me again, and yet you let me tell her, knowing how she would react."

Bill responded, "And if I had warned you about her reaction, you wouldn't have told her how much you wanted that."

"Duh..." I said scornfully.

Bill continued, "You see, the implication that Jamie is capable of changing her physiology at will, rocks her fundamental world view at the deepest level, if that is possible, then anything is possible, and that is a scary thought.

Just like she resisted the idea initially of becoming a true woman even though deep down that is what she wanted, she now resists the idea that she can switch from having a dick to a pussy and back again at will because it implies that the reality is that nothing is certain in this world, which I know to be the case, at least at the intellectual level, but there is a big difference between understanding something intellectually and emotionally buying into it.

The truth is that by saying what you said, you have set a process in motion inside her and in this change there are 5 stages, known as the 5 stages of loss, and in this case the loss is the loss of the concept that there is certainty in the physical world around her. The five stages are as follows:

1.Denial and Isolation -- in this case she tries to convince herself that the idea that she could have a dick again is impossible and stupid, and isolates herself, particularly from you, because she does not want to know.

2.Anger - unable to hide in denial anymore, but still not ready to take the implications of this loss on board, she becomes angry, angry at everybody, angry at the world, and in this case particularly angry with you.

3.Bargaining -- in this phase she tries to convince herself that she doesn't need to let go of her old world view completely, and in your case particularly she will try to convince herself that it doesn't matter what you want or mean to her, except in this case, she knows in her heart that what you want is what she wants.

4.Depression -- This is where she might get the feeling that she has lost all hope, maybe feeling that her life, and specifically her life with you has no meaning.

5.Acceptance -- Finally she will come to accept that her world view has to change, and finally start to embrace it, allowing her to transform herself.

In reality the process is by no means a logical sequence of events in the way I have laid it out, but rather a process that involves switching between the different stages with the general movement in a forward direction, you have probably already seen evidence of all these stages in Jamie except the last." "And did you expect that I would think there was anything that was worth putting Jamie through so much pain for?" I asked.

"No," replied Bill, "that's why I did not warn you about the potential consequence of your action, but obviously I believe that this type of transformational experience represents the most significant type of change in people's lives, it literally moves people to a new plane of existence."

"But what about Deblock therapy," I enquired, "Doesn't that automatically remove the blocks allowing people to go straight to acceptance?"

"No," Bill replied emphatically. "Deblock therapy, only removes internal conflicts and inconsistency of thinking, it only deblocks unconscious automatic thoughts acting at the subconscious and unconscious levels which are tied to outmoded belief systems stemming from childhood.

Deblock therapy simply opens people's eyes to reality, the reality of the uncertain universe we live in and the unlimited potential of the mind. You still have to do the work. Actually you have no option but to do the work because you can't lie to yourself about where you are.

If you had suggested that you wanted to experience having their dick in you to any other woman than Jamie, a woman who had not had Deblock therapy and not had a natural male to female transition they would just have laughed in your face and told you it wasn't physically possible. Jamie however knows that it is in her heart."

Bill continued, "I believe that this transformational process is the most powerful force for good we have in the world we live in. I have seen people in Africa who were completely traumatized by horrific events, get Deblock therapy and completely change the lives of themselves and others around them.

They have gone through great pain but have learned to accept all the terrible things that have happened to them, and the fact that in most cases nobody was to blame including themselves. They have accepted the fact that their parents, children, brothers, sisters, husbands and wives all died from pestilence, famine, or war, and are turning it around and inspiring others and working to end pestilence, famine and war.

All because of one thing, the fact that these people are no longer able to turn away from the reality of what has happened to them and what is still happening in the world, but also to the fact that they know that there are no limits to the power of acceptance, love and compassion once people begin to realize their true potential."

Finally I felt my anger towards Bill seeping away, the power of his words, the depth of his compassion and the obvious dedication to his cause, were beginning to soften my heart, in the end I just had one question for him.

"What can I do?" I asked.

"Nothing," Bill replied, "except to trust Jamie's process.

In the end she will go through everything looking for any certainty she can hang on to and finding none until she realizes that there is only one certainty LOVE NEVER FAILS, she will cling to your love for her and her love for you and all her family and friends and let everything else go, and then she will find the power within herself to transform."

On impulse I gave Bill a quick kiss on the lips, and then quickly left. On my return home that Jamie was in our bedroom and she had locked the door. She wouldn't talk to me at all except to tell me to go away. So I just sulked about the house, worrying about Jamie and feeling sorry for myself.

Finally I was glad for the opportunity to leave the house for a while, I had to pick up the girls but I didn't want to bring them home with Jamie like she was, so I rang Jackie and asked if I could leave them with her for the rest of the day and over night.

Jackie assured me that she was glad to take the kids and told me that Jeff was at home today and had been looking for an opportunity to take the kids to the park, so when I arrived he was waiting outside to take the girls.

Jackie was also waiting outside to greet me and once Jeff had left with the girls she invited me in. I could see the look of concern on her face.

As I slumped down on her sofa she came over and sat next to me. "So what's up," she enquired, "I don't think I have ever seen you this low. Does it have anything to do with Jamie?" she asked.

"Yes," I replied, not saying anything further.

"Shit," said Jackie, "you poor darling, do you want to talk about it?"

"No," I said, starting to cry.

"That's ok," Jackie said, holding me lightly in her arms as I sobbed.

I must have sat there crying for more than an hour in Jackie's arms before I finally went home.

When I did arrive home the bedroom door was still locked, and I called to Jamie but she didn't reply.

In the end I just sat with my back against the bedroom door silently sobbing.

It must have been more than 2 hours before Jamie finally called me in a small voice, "Ashley, can you come in please? Then I heard her unlock the door."

A minute after she unlocked the door, I knocked on the door and walked in, seeing that she was lying on the bed propped up on a pillow with a blanket over her.

When I saw her face she had a quizzical expression that I couldn't make out. I couldn't make out if she was mad or not. One thing was for sure, she had been doing a lot of crying like me, I could tell by her red eyes.

Then unexpectedly she removed the blanket revealing a dick, and as I looked on in fascination she said, "I guess this indicates how much I love you."

Still unaware of her mood and how she might react I just stood transfixed to the spot, and Jamie still not betraying her feelings said, "Don't you want to have a closer look?"

Gingerly I approached the bed and just stood next to her, level with her newly formed penis, my eyes still transfixed by the new appendage, every so often my eyes flicking to her face, trying to read her expression.

After a few moments of me doing nothing, Jamie said, "You can touch it, it won't bite."

Unable to believe my luck I reached out and took her member in my hand, where it immediately started to harden. I just couldn't wait to have it in me.

Jamie sensing my need asked me to remove my clothes and lie next to her on the bed, and immediately went to work on my pussy with her tongue, by this time my pussy was very wet.

After a short time of eating me out I was moaning and pleading with her to put her beautiful new dick in me. And soon she was pushing her girly dick into me filling me up. I had missed her dick like hell and the feeling of having her inside me once more was like coming home.

Biting my lip and looking at Jamie while I felt her moving inside me I looked at her beautiful face above me and said, "I fucking love you Jamie."

In reply to which Jamie moved inside me in such a way that she touched my G spot with her dick, causing me to cry out in pleasure and said, "I know you fucking do Ashley, and I fucking love you too."

Now feeling once again enveloped in Jamie's love for me and having her inside me I was full of gratitude for my Jamie, for having her in my life, for her love, and for everything she meant to me.

Given that the kids weren't around, I got on my hands and knees and waved my pussy at Jamie, who responded by ramming hard into me from behind. Now as she fucked me and squeezed my tit I screamed out in pleasure as she seemed to hit my G spot with every thrust, causing me to orgasm again and again.

She then grabbed my long dark hair and pulled hard causing me to cry out even harder bringing tears to my eyes. As she fucked me I began to realize that the way she felt inside me now was better than she had ever felt before she had a pussy, it was like there was a new dimension.

"Oh fuck," Jamie said, "it feels so good to fuck you like this and know what pleasure I am giving you, to know what it feels like for you."

Suddenly I realized why Jamie felt so much better inside me than she had felt before. She knew exactly what I was feeling, what I wanted, because she knew what it was like to have a pussy and feel female orgasms.

There was a connection between us in our lovemaking that haven't been there before, and just knowing that Jamie knew what I was feeling as she fucked me made it feel 10 times better.

I just wanted Jamie in me all the time, fucking me and filling me up. Now I made Jamie lie down and mounted her cowgirl style so that I could control the fucking, grabbing her hands and placing them on my tits as I rode her.

We carried on fucking till the early hours of the morning, and again I was missing out on sleep, but this time for a good reason, and when we were just too tired to carry on Jamie made to pull out of me but I wouldn't let her, saying that I wanted to sleep with her inside me.

The following morning I was woken by the phone ringing, I was lying on top of Jamie, and she was hard inside me, and being as gentle as I could I reached over and picked up the phone making sure Jamie stayed firmly inside me.

It was Jackie, and looking over at the clock I realized it was 11:00 AM, "Oh shit," I said, "I forgot about the kids."

Jackie replied, "Don't worry about your kids, they are having fun playing with our baby girl while Jeff makes us all brunch. I was just ringing to see how you were but I guess from your voice that things are better between you again.

"Better than you can imagine," I said, "but you will find out why in due course."

When Jamie finally woke up still hard inside me, I raised myself up and rode her cowgirl style to 6 orgasms before we finally got up and had lunch. Then after lunch we fucked like rabbits again until we finally went over and picked up our kids.

As we drove back from Jackie and Jeff's house the kids were all excited talking about their trip to the park the previous day, talking about daddy, auntie Jackie, and playing with the baby girl.

When we finally got the kids to sleep, Jamie and I started fucking again although this time we had to be quieter because of the kids sleeping in the room.

I laid Jamie down and put her inside me pressing my tits against hers and gently kissing her as we slowly fucked, again I was feeling grateful to have her inside me.

We continued the same pattern for the next 2 weeks, taking the kids to the crèche, fucking while they were at the crèche and then fucking after the girls went to sleep.

One weekend Jeff and Alex had gone off to watch a game and stay over with some friends, Jackie and Annabel came over that night, and brought their babies along, Annabel had a baby boy named John, almost the same age as Jackie's daughter Tina.

To say that Jackie and Annabel were surprised to see that Jamie had a dick again would be an understatement and both of them begged Jamie to fuck them, where I would get them to eat me out while Jamie fucked them.

Annabel even asked Jamie to fuck her in the ass as she had done previously and then I got my strapon and fucked Jamie in the ass while she ate out Jackie.

After 4 weeks of healthy sex with Jamie's dick inside me a lot of the time, I eventually started missing her pussy again, but this time I did not have to say anything. One morning Jamie simply woke up and she had her pussy back.

As soon as I saw her pussy again I couldn't resist eating her out, and we both got in the 69 position and came again and again and again.

One night I was laying on top of Jamie and fucking her from behind with a strapon. And asking her what it felt like to have me inside her and fucking her and dominating her, all she could do was moan from the fucking I was giving her.

Suddenly I asked, "What if I had a real dick, then you could really feel what it was like to have me deep inside you, as I said this I pushed my strapon dildo deep inside her."

Jamie replied, "I would love to have you deep inside me."

To which I said, "If I had a dick I would want to be inside you night and day the way you fucked me when you had a dick."

Then Jamie said ironically, "Well it's not as if somebody can suddenly just grow a dick overnight is it?"

The following day I was meeting with Bill at the offices of TransformSys.

When I arrived Bill said, "Let me guess, you want to have Deblock therapy."

"That's right," I said, "but how did you guess."

"Not hard," he said, "You are not exactly the submissive type, so I imagine you wouldn't mind giving your beautiful Jamie a real good fucking. You would love to make her yours, not that she isn't already, but with a dick, getting right inside her."

Despite myself I blushed as Bill said, "I'm right of course aren't I?"

"Yes," I replied, quietly.

"So who do I make my check payable to for the therapy?" I asked.

"No need." Bill replied, "Jamie beat you to it. She is a rich woman now due to her success as an artist and donated $100,000 to TransformSys for our work in third world countries, provided we give you Deblock therapy if you ever ask for it."

The following weekend, after the kids had got to sleep, I told Jamie to go and lock up while I got naked and slipped into bed. When Jamie came up I admired Jamie's beautiful body as she got naked and climbed into bed with me.