The Third Swing at Bat

"Why didn't you tell me this when we were married?"

"I don't really know, Nathan. I guess I knew I could handle it. I wasn't going to go to bed with him but the attention felt good. You were gone half the time and he'd come around on some pretense or another. We'd have coffee and talk business but I wasn't stupid; I knew he was looking to get laid but like I said he struck out every time.

"Well, anyway, he was the one who told me where to find you that night. Hell, he had the room key and warned me about what you were doing. So, when I turned the key in the lock and walked in I wasn't completely surprised although actually seeing it just blew me away. I knew our marriage was over right then and there.

"I don't know today how much you remember of it but the woman had her face and lips right on your stuff, both of you passed out from what appeared to have been a night of debauchery. I completely lost it. With all the opportunities I had over the years, I never once fucked another man and I felt totally humiliated. The only recourse I felt I had was to go scorched earth especially when James told me this wasn't the first time, that you did this all the time, that it was common knowledge among the consultants and even some of our friends.

"You know how it went from there. As for James, he ended up getting the pussy he wanted after I filed and I feel like shit now about it but he ended up being a waste of time. That lasted about a month or so and we broke it off. He wanted to keep it a secret since he was still working for you but I'd had enough of him by then anyway."

I sipped my beer listening and watching her. I remember James leaving a few months after the incident although I had attributed it to his displeasure with my supposed affair. I had no clue he had been fucking Janet in my absence. She continued.

"I refused to forgive you for it and you know the rest, at least up until a few months ago. I received a call from a woman named Susan Solomon who was James's widow. He apparently had died of pancreatic cancer a few weeks earlier and before he died he had written several letters to people that he asked to have delivered after he passed away.

"James had become a born again Christian and according to Mrs. Solomon he felt he needed to make confessions to several people he believed he had wronged over the course of his life; I was one of them. She wanted to deliver a letter to me. When she learned I had been married to you she informed me there was a letter to you as well and we agreed I would deliver that to you personally."

She pushed a small white envelop across the table to me.

"James confession is what spiraled me into what was ultimately a breakdown and you know what happened from there. Mrs. Solomon was adamant that James was truly repentant for what he did to us and by the time he realized what he needed to do he was too sick to travel."

"What did he do, Janet?"

"He set the whole thing up, everything. He and a friend doctored the drinks you and Mrs. Lucas were having and when the time was right they carried you to the hotel room, stripped both of you and positioned the two of you so that I would assume what you had done when I entered the room. He said they had planned to have sex with Mrs. Lucas but they didn't have time and still be able to get me back to the room.

"It was all a fucking setup and I destroyed my marriage as a result. Mrs. Lucas was already separated from her husband at that time so there were no repercussions on that end but he did indicate he wrote a letter of apology to her as well."

Janet was weeping softly now as I sat there digesting what she had said and I toyed with the letter in my hand. It was the confession of a dead man over events now long dead themselves. I didn't need to read it.

"He did all that to fuck you?" I asked with amazement. "And he did and then moved on to another conquest. Did you ever stop to think just once that all you needed to do was sit down with me like we are now and ask the pertinent questions?

"Those twelve hours of my life, from the time I arrived at the company party until I woke up in that hotel room with Marcella have been stamped indelibly into my conscience since the night they happened. Neither one of us remembered a single thing past 1AM. I knew that you and a couple other women were engaged with a few other groups at the party and I didn't give second thought to it. We were all drinking.

"Janet, never at any time in our marriage did I ever willingly cheat on you and it has killed me for eight years now to think I might have done so in a drunken stupor. Even still I never had a chance to defend myself or make any stand to save my marriage. I loved you like no other for every one of those fourteen years and overnight it was all swept away. Not only that but you inflicted maximum pain for something I had absolutely no recollection of.

"You ever read Kafka? That's where I was for six months until my sister sat me down at her table and read the riot act to me. The only connection to my prior life was the visitation I had with Rose and I guess I can be thankful for that."

Her eyes were red from crying. I didn't need any revelation to know she had always been in the wrong and even before this latest revelation she knew it too and that's what pissed me even more. It was probably what pushed her into the cuckoo house; realizing her grievous sin.

"Remember when we first saw this house?" I asked her trying to shift to some levity in the situation. She nodded her answer.

"I always thought it was too big but once we moved in, before Rose came along, I came to love it. I remember carving the first notch over there when she was what, two years old?"

There was a slight smile from the remembrance breaking through the anguished face.

"I forgave you, Janet. I left as much of it as I could when you and Carl got together and I started dating seriously again. The only thing I still carry with me is the pain of not being able to be there every day while my baby grew into a woman of her own. Visitation just doesn't cover it, I guess."

"Nathan, even though you never told me until now, I knew you had forgiven me back when Carl was still here; I just hadn't yet acknowledged that I had done anything wrong. That didn't come until long after he was gone.

"Is there anything I can do to make things, anything right between us?"

I didn't need to hesitate.

"Keep being a good mom to Rose and a good Nana to any grandbabies she might give us and I will take another beer."

She actually laughed and brought me another one along with a fresh frosted mug.

"So are you going to get past your episode OK? I asked her.

"This was part of it, knowing you have forgiven me helps me know I'll do OK"...

I sat in the drive for a while thinking about our conversation and the revelations of how the demise of my first marriage came about and realized that somebody had stirred a pot of shit with me as the stick but he was now nothing but fucking worm food... On another note I'm having lunch with both Rose and Janet next week.

*****************************

"Have you fucked her yet?" Jeanette asked me half seriously as we cooled down from one of our usual escapades.

"Not going to." I meant it too. I had no desire.

"You are having lunch with her a couple times a week." She said with a grin.

"Perhaps, but never dinner."

She was exaggerating about lunches. It was usually once a week and usually Rose was with us. I think Janet had a space in the back of her mind that beyond all the therapeutic mishmash there was a sliver of optimism for her to be able to rekindle something between us. I never led her on in any manner in that regard but it was pretty damn clear in my mind that the USS Hopeful Shit had sailed years ago.

Besides, I enjoyed what Jeanette and I had going. We enjoyed dining, hitting a movie or a concert and even a ball game once in a while and just as important our compatibility in the bedroom was unmatched by any other relationship I had ever been in including my two ex-wives.

"No, I like the little horny tart I already have" I said as I swatted her naked and sweaty behind...

We had just been seated at the Oak, an upscale steakhouse downtown, when I saw her walk into the dining room on the arm of a managing director of one of our competitors, the very same firm Michelle had worked at since I had her sacked almost two years earlier. They were seated so that Michelle and I had had a direct line of sight with each other from across the room.

"Now all you need, cowboy, is for the nuthouse resident to walk in and sit behind you." Jeanette had to stifle her laughter but was having a difficult time of it.

"Cut it out, you she-devil." I jested.

I knew the guy, an obnoxious prick who got caught banging the underage daughter of one of his clients and as rumor has it paid a lot of money to keep it quiet. Of course this is all insider information as not a peep of it became public. John Marshall is his name and we've been oil and water for years.

Michelle knew the history and perhaps that explained the condescending sneer that would pop on her lips when by occasion her glare fastened on mine. She had discovered who burned her at Hawthorne even though I had tried to stay discreet. Apparently John Marshall was her new meal ticket and she was making it obvious.

It wasn't a business dinner for the two of them. He was fawning over her and she provided the tease. From what I could tell, Michelle had found a new boss to fuck on her way back up the ladder. Whether Mrs. Marshall #2 approved of the whoredom might remain to be seen.

"You are conniving something, I just know it." Jeanette said interrupting my conniving thoughts. I just smiled at her intuition.

I had something to smile about at that. Mrs. Marshall was on her second marriage with good old John and I was pretty certain that Michelle did not realize that Cheryl Marshall was the sister of none other than Caroline Roberts, formerly the Mrs. Caroline Mosey. It's a small world after all.

Cheryl's late first husband had worked for the same firm as John and was his managing principal when Marshall was first hired on. The couple was well thought of and since his passing the company had established a memorial scholarship for local high school kids. Call it intuition or just being around the block a few times but I was developing a sense that a certain ex-wife was going to need the services of a headhunter if things continued on their current course.

I think they used to call it 'dropping a dime' back when payphones were still in vogue.

A couple months later I heard from Caroline that her sister was suing John Marshall for divorce and named Michelle in the action. The fallout from it was still pretty discreet but a few weeks after that Michelle had her treasured house up for sale. I almost considered making a ghost bid for it but Janet of all people talked me out of it.

"What are you going to do with it once she rides out of town?" She asked seriously.

"Probably sell it again I suppose."

"Great. She takes your money, unsaddles her burden and rides off with you holding the bag. I thought you were smarter than that, Nathan Becker."

I thought so too and agreed to chuck the foolish notion aside. A couple months later Michelle sold her trophy house after agreeing to cover points with a lower figure than her original asking price. It sometimes helps to have friends in the real estate business. She ended up moving a couple hours south on a quest for a new career ladder to whore herself on.

Before she left I cornered her in a booth at a Ruby Tuesday's at lunch. She was alone or I would never have approached her but for once I wanted answers to questions I probably already knew the answer to.

"Michelle, fancy seeing you here in this fine dining establishment." I said as I slid in across from her. She looked pissed but I just raised my hands and said "Peace offering."

It was bull shit. I could care less if she felt peaceful or not, I just wanted some answers.

"You here to gloat over your fucking victory, Nathan?"

Well, fuck the peace then.

"No, Michelle, just looking for a simple explanation, that's all. Just tell me why and why you did it like you did."

I didn't think she was going to answer for a long time but she didn't have it in her to shut up and say the sensible thing.

"You want me to tell you what a lousy fuck you are? OK, you suck in bed. Satisfied?"

I just laughed, sipped my tea and laughed some more. She got a perplexed look on her face and then just sighed.

"OK, so you're not that bad. You're pretty good as fucks go. You're damaged goods, Nathan, badly damaged."

"What in hell do you mean damaged goods? What the fuck does something like that mean? You went all out cuckolding me, throwing my shit out, locking me out and not even sitting down and discussing it with me? Fuck you, you're damaged, you're a fucking damaged cunt."

I knew I was being louder than I should have so I lowered my voice.

"Jesus H. Christ, you really don't know." She said. "Do you know how many times you cried out her name in your damn sleep? More times than I can count! Janet! Nathan, you still love the damn woman. Why you married me I'll never know.

"Why did I do it the way I did? I don't know. In hindsight I probably should have just filed papers and drove off in the sunset. For what it's worth I hadn't fucked Dan until that night his wife found us or any other man until then. The next day I tried calling you to see if maybe there was a way to get past the burnt bridge but you wouldn't take the calls. Then when Caroline told me how she found out I knew I was wasting my time."

"Michelle, I never knew I mentioned her name while sleeping. I wish you had told me. For what it's worth, I don't love her, not like I did. There were a lot of baggage and open issues that had never been resolved, you know that. I suppose I was and maybe still am damaged goods but not because of what you thought. Instead it was for the very same kind of things you did to me."

She had a perplexed look on her face for a few moments and then the damn bitch just grinned.

"You don't know it but you are in love, Nathan. You never stopped being in love with her. You're like a Mickey Rourke tough guy trying to hide it inside some barkeep's pussy. Jeanette's not your love, Nathan, and neither was I. Your wife is Janet; always will be 'till the day you die.

"To you, I'm a whore who dumped you for a quick ride to the top of some heap but you're wrong. I'm just a woman who stayed faithful to her husband until I realized it wasn't supposed to be. Yeah, I looked to Marshall as a ticket but he came to me. I didn't chase him and truth be told he played me about his marriage or I wouldn't have touched him; same with Dan too. I believed his line of shit. But, fuck all of that; it's all water under the burnt bridge now, isn't it?"

I toyed with my drink and just nodded.

"I'll see you around, maybe, Nathan."

With that she was gone and I was left sitting there feeling like I just had my hat handed to me along with the bill. I don't even like Mickey Rourke. Fuck her, she's wrong. That didn't stop me from watching her walk to her car from the window and wondering if there wasn't just a shred of truth to any of it...

*****************************

A bead of sweat rolled off her erect nipple and dropped onto my forehead as she perched her taunt body over me. A moment later Jeanette fed me her munch and I stayed on it until she uncontrollably let loose a gushing orgasm over my face. Sexually we were perfect, compatible in every way physically. I could have stayed like that indefinitely yet Michelle had poisoned my mind with her departing remarks several months earlier.

I think she did it knowing the effect as some kind of feminine revenge. I had been having lunch with Rose and her mother nearly every week since we had that initial sit-down at the old house. After a while it started to become familiar and more comfortable.

Occasionally Rose would cancel out on her end and Janet and I would share lunch somewhere downtown usually reminiscing about the younger days of Rose's childhood. I'd end up back at the office mad at the world for having those years plucked away from me. Janet seemed oblivious as did Rose.

One afternoon I kind of lost it and vented some pent up frustration at Janet. Later that evening I called her and apologized and afterwards felt good about it. It was a valve release of sorts, I suppose. Jeanette called it a spat.

"If you take some candy over to her she might cook you dinner, baby." She pushed her lips out with a fake pout. "Before you do that, fuck me doggie."

She moved onto her haunches and pushed her beautiful ass into the air and with her fingers opened her wet slit. I didn't need a second invitation.

"You two are like a married couple already except you don't fuck each other... yet." She said as she lay back sated from our tryst.

"Been there and done that. You know the story."

"Yeah, I do but I can see the signs." She said as she kissed my ear.

"Until then, I'll keep you."

I liked being kept like that and I showed her my appreciation every chance I got. What I didn't like was the conflict. I felt like Rose was pushing me and Janet was being coy about it; even Jeanette seemed acquiesced to some eventuality that I didn't seem to be a party to.

I had to act...

"Rose, here's your opportunity. We have an opening in our new Atlanta office and I'd like you to take it."

"I'd have to move Daddy."

"I know but it would only be for a couple years and then I'd want to pull you back in and have you takeover managing those functions here. I've got a couple retirements that are going to happen around that same time frame and this will prepare you for that opportunity as well."

She pondered it for a couple days and finally accepted the job...

Rose had been working out of our Windy Hill office in Atlanta for a couple months before I had lunch with Janet again. I had taken the time between to spend as much time as I could with Jeanette and see where our relationship might go. Having Rose working out of town gave me the excuse I needed to cut back on the lunches.

If I thought getting Rose out of the way as an intermediary between her mother and me was going to resolve my own conflicted feelings, I was wrong.

"Nathan, you have to come by. She asked after you specifically."

Janet was hosting a going away party for Mrs. Wilson from across the street who was moving to her daughter's house in Connecticut rather than being stuffed in an old folk's home somewhere in a neighborhood across town.

"It's a small gathering. Her two daughters, old man Green Jeans and a few of the other neighbors on the street. You can bring Jeanette too."

I gave it a good bit of thought and agreed to come the following Saturday afternoon. By all means I was going to take Jeanette with me. It would allow me to get out when the getting was good. She didn't want to go at first but I took care of business putting a smile on her face and she was game.

We showed up around 1PM that afternoon and the backyard was all decorated up with the guest of honor all dressed up and sitting in a wicker rocking chair. Old Mrs. Wilson was probably pushing near eighty now but she was always a beautiful woman even with the dementia setting in. The big surprise was Rose was also there having driven back the night before.

We made all the introductions and everybody settled into party mode while I helped with the grilling chores along with a couple of the neighborhood husbands. Jeanette mingled with the other guests and I surprisingly found myself relaxed while talking with another couple and Janet. We were all laughing and having a good time and through it all I never really noticed Jeanette watching us, at least not until I thought about it later.