Big Bang Theory Season 07 Ep. 01

"Haven't you seen the way Penny and Sheldon are hanging out together? I betcha they two of them are doing it and I mean a LOT."

Amy gave Bernadette a sly smile, "Well if we're gonna do that, I'm changing into something a little more alluring; how about you Bernadette?"

Bernie giggled, "I guess I could put on something to show off my assets, don't you think? Last one changed has to buy the first round."

Sheldon and Penny slipped into casual clothes and headed over to Sheldon's apartment. If he's away any more than one night, he gets home sick. As he set up the board for 3-D chess, Penny was sitting in Leonard's chair with her back to Sheldon, looking through a magazine.

She turned to him, "Why don't you just admit you only want to play this game because you always play it with Leonard and you miss him?"

He scoffed at her, "You overestimate his significance in my life. Do I miss how he makes a face on my toaster waffle with syrup? No! Do I miss the way he fixes the zipper on my jacket when it gets stuck? I don't think so. Do I miss how we say good night to each other through the walls of our bedroom using Morse code?" He shook his head no.

She flipped through the magazine, "Okay, I get it, I get it. You are an emotionless robot."

He stared at her, "Well, I try."

She put the magazine down and turned towards him, "All right, let's just get the stupid game over with."

He hopped up, "Great, I'll go first. By the way, how are you with zippers?"

"Why?"

"Well, I really need to go to the bathroom, and this one's gone all catawampus." He stood up and showed her the stuck zipper on his pants."

She chuckled, "I see what you're doing here Sheldon. You just want me to get your pants unzipped so we can fool around again."

He gave her a shrug and a sly smile, "So can you fix it?"

Over at the University mixer, Raj struck up a conversation with a gorgeous Asian woman. They talked about downloading each other's papers on the server and stood there awkwardly and she turned and walked away.

Raj met Howard at the Hors d'oeuvre table and Howard looked across the room and saw Janine Davis (Regina King) pouring herself a stiff drink. He poked Raj, "Check it out; Mrs. Davis from Human Resources is here. She's probably on the lookout for sexual harassment."

"Oh, great, there goes my chances of being sexually harassed."

"I heard her husband left her for a hot, young undergrad."

Raj chuckled, "That's so much better than the old, ugly ones. I'd still like another shot at Janine. That bout the four of us had with her in her office was unbelievable, but I'd much rather get her one on one."

"Hey, how about me? I wouldn't mind another go at her too."

"Why you? You have Bernadette and I'm all alone."

"Bernadette is at the conference and the way she was talking, I think Amy and her are going down to the bar to try and get free drinks and more, if you get my drift."

"You're not jealous of Bernadette with other guys in a strange town?"

Howard scoffed, "Better than having her doing it right here beneath my nose. She can have fun, it's sorta a free hall pass; I get one too. So what do you think, maybe we can double team Janine. I loved her ass and would love to feel that tight butt surrounding my junk again." He poked Raj, "Look out, she's headed this way, play it cool."

She came over to the table. She had a smile on her face. Dressed in a two piece black skirt suit, the skirt was tight, showing off her gorgeous ass. She was wearing a very colorful silky blouse beneath the open jacket, showing her ample breasts to Raj and Howard. With drink in hand she nodded, "Mr. Wolowitz, Dr. Koothrappali."

Howard smiled back at her, "Mrs. Davis, nice to see you."

Raj immediately put his foot in his mouth, "You know I recently read an interesting article on infidelity among penguins."

She looked at him, "Okay?"

"So the fact that your husband left you makes you feel unattractive, just remember, penguins get cheated on, and they're adorable."

"I'll keep that in mind." She grabbed a couple snacks and walked away.

Howard turned to Raj, "It was better when you couldn't talk to women."

Back at the conference, both Bernadette and Amy changed into little more attractive outfits. They were sipping on drinks. Amy had a brown skirt on that ended above the knees. Her legs were bare and above that she had a simple cotton blouse on and a burgundy jacket over it. She wore more make-up than usual and as she reviewed the tomorrow's activities with Bernadette, Bernie looked up at her.

"You look rather attractive tonight Amy, I can see you're on the prowl." She was dressed on a black flowered dress and a black form fitting short sleeved black blouse over it. Her golden blonde hair tumbled down to rest on the tops of her large breasts. She picked up her drink and toasted to Amy, "To the advancement of science."

Amy picked hers up, "And to the sick and dying who make it possible."

Bernadette chuckled, "This is fun. We never really get to talk shop with Penny around. We usually just end up talking about men."

"Which is fine, but it's nice to mix it up with a little intellectual conversation."

A waiter came over to them and placed another round of drinks on their table, "From the two gentlemen at the bar."

Amy got excited, "Oh, my gosh, guys bought us drinks! Guys bought us drinks!" She turned towards them and called out, "Thank you, thank you, thank you so much."

Bernadette began to blush, "Be cool."

Amy lost hers, "You be cool! Guys are hitting on us, and not just to get to Penny."

Bernadette was grinning from ear to ear, "You're right." She looked to the guys, "Thank you!"

Back at Sheldon's apartment, Sheldon still had a problem with his zipper, but held off while Penny and he played chess.

Penny sat back, "Gosh, I wonder what Leonard's doing right now. I miss him so much."

Sheldon squirmed around on the sofa, "Well, of you'd like, we could call him. I mean, that you could call him. As I've explained, the absence of my friends does not cause me pain."

She shook her head, "You're just saying that because we've been fucking like animals. Well, I'm calling him."

"Alright, but put him on speakerphone so I can hear too."

In the North Sea, the group of scientists were cutting loose, seeing their work was nearly complete. They were dancing and singing to loud music. All of a sudden there was a loud buzzing and a bearded Leonard called out, "Excuse me ladies, but my pants are buzzing."

Mandy Chow (Melissa Tang) chuckled, "If we head back to my cabin, I'll make your pants do a lot more than buzz."

Leonard's jaw dropped, but moved over and answered his cell phone, "North Sea, how can I "kelp" you?" He fist bumped with Mandy."

Penny called out, "Leonard?"

"Penny?" He turned to the crowd, "Hey, it's Penny. Everybody, say "Hi" to Penny." He raised his cell phone and the entire room yelled out, "Hi, Penny!"

Penny looked shocked, "Sounds like you're having a good time."

"Best time of my life."

Sheldon broke in, "Isn't it 5:30 in the morning there?"

Leonard chuckled, "Is it?" He turned to the group, "Hey, everybody, it's 5:30 in the morning!"

Mandy yelled out to him, "Maybe it's time to take you to bed."

Penny overheard that, "Okay, well, we were just calling you because we were missing you."

Someone in the group yelled out, "Iceberg!"

Leonard yelled out, "Oh! Hang on."

Sheldon was scared suddenly, "Are you in danger?"

"No, it's a drinking game. Whenever we see an iceberg, we take a shot."

The all began chanting, "Berg! Berg! Berg! Berg! Berg! Berg!"

Penny was really getting upset, "Leonard? Leonard?" Suddenly they were cut off. She scoffed and looked to Sheldon, "I cannot believe we were missing that jerk. Stand up, I'll get that zipper unstuck and after you visit the little boy's room, I'll be waiting for you in your bedroom. Get ready for the fuck of your life. I'm gonna grade you on what you've learned."

Back at the bar, Bernadette came back from talking to the guys and she had a huge smile on her face.

Amy was excited to find out how it went, "So what happened? How'd it go?"

Bernadette giggled, "My panties are wet from just talking to those guys. There are three of them, if you don't mind, I'll take two and you can have the big black guy. It went perfectly. I thanked them again and let them know we're available and willing to entertain them back in our room later."

"So let me get this straight, I can drink all of these drinks and get layed in the process?"

Bernadette giggled, "Yes, it's all cool. Doesn't that black guy look just like Glenn my old professor and boyfriend? His name is Leon and he loves brunettes. The two other guys are here from the rodeo in town their names are Brad and Larry."

Amy scoffed, "Who cares, we're getting laid tonight."

Back in Sheldon's bedroom, Penny tore off her loose fitting top and skimmed out of her jeans and panties. She threw back his covers and lay back on the cool sheets, naked and waiting for Sheldon.

He came into the bedroom and let out a groan. He couldn't believe he had the gorgeous Penny, naked and waiting for him, but his zipper got stuck and couldn't get it back down.

Penny slid off the bed and grabbed him by the t-shirt, "Get your ass over here Sheldon and let me handle that again." She nimbly yanked it down and before he knew it, she had him naked. Her wet pussy was presented to his eyes as she flopped down and spread her legs wide. She waited impatiently for his huge cock to plunge into her. Her high, perfectly rounded tits jutted out like twin mountain peaks, waiting to be sucked. Her legs, so long and slender, were moist with the flowing juices seeping out of her dripping hole. "Well Sheldon, what are you waiting for, my pretty little pussy here is crying for your cock, can't you see how wet I am?"

Sheldon couldn't say anything. He could only stare at her; he took in her incredible body. His cock was stiff as a board and was pointing straight at her.

Painstakingly slow, Penny raised her hands and began to slide her palms up and down along her side from the outer swells of her tits to her cunt. Penny cupped her tits, squeezing them lightly, pushing them out towards Sheldon. Her hands drifted down to her belly, moving ever slowly until she reached her fleshy lips. She licked her parched lips and stared up at Sheldon, "Don't you wanna fuck me. I want you to fuck me, one last time before Leonard returns."

He groaned and nodded, "Yes, but..." He groaned louder as he watched her fingers moved lower, through her fleshy lips and dipped the tip of two fingers into her dripping hole. He stepped closer, the tip of his cock brushed against her calf and the pre-cum oozing out left a trail of wetness along her silky skin.

Penny began stroking her clit and dipping every so often into her hole, coating her fingertips and then returning to her clit. She stroked it over and over again. Her green eyes caught his and she whispered out, "I want you to fuck me, Sheldon. I want you to fuck me like you never fucked me before. I want to put my finger up your ass while you're fucking me and I want you to do the same to me. After you fuck me and make me cum, I'm gonna suck all of our cum off your cock and lick your balls and drive my tongue deep into your asshole. I'll tongue-fuck your ass until you get nice and hard again. I'll ride your hard cock as you fuck me with that gorgeous cock of yours and if you're really good, I'll let you fuck my ass."

He let out a grunt and pushed her back onto the bed. His leaking cock left a trail of wetness along her sleek thighs. He hovered over her and as their lips met, her tongue darted deep into his mouth, feeling the roof of his mouth and tongue with her tongue tip.

Sheldon turned his head and buried his face in the crook of her neck. He rained kisses all over her neck. His hands slid down and cupped her tight ass cheeks. He wormed his fingers between her cheeks and dipped down and tickled her puckered hole.

Penny squirmed and pushed back against his fingers and felt his hardened cock throbbing against her cuntlips. She squirmed, pushing her hot cunt against his cock. She wanted it badly and couldn't wait any longer. She rotated her hips; she nibbled at his ear and neck with her active mouth. She pressed her luscious tits against his chest. Her ripe, stiff nipples scraped against his chest hair.

Sheldon roamed his hands over her thighs and gorgeous tits. He stopped to tweak her nipples into rock-hard pebbles and then he ran his finger down into the valley between her high-set, firm tits. He leaned forward and unable to control himself any longer and plastered his mouth against her juicy cunt, he was using the tactics she taught him, shoving his tongue deep into her hole and clamping his lips around it, sucked viciously trying to extract every drop of her cunt juices from her hole.

Penny's fingers clutched at his head and she pressed hard against his forehead, pulling his head from her cunt. "Oh Sheldon, fuck me know! I want you inside me now!"

He slid up her lush body and now his mouth covered her, he fed her, her own juices. He groaned into her mouth when he felt her large fingers close around his cock. She arched her back and forced his cock between her thick, fleshly lips.

He wiggled his hips as he felt her swipe his cock up and down her own cunt. She pressed the leaking knob against her hole and lodged in at the entrance. He lunged forward, his hips thrusting as he drove into her pussy and felt the hot, fleshy walls of her cunt envelope his cock.

Penny's jaw dropped down and a gasp escaped her throat. "Oh yessssss, Sheldon shove it in deeper!"

Sheldon thrust hard, sending his entire length into her pussy. He stopped as an urge to cum came way too quickly. His cum-bloated nuts crushed against her lush ass cheeks. He moved again, causing the head of his cock to rub against her cervix. He heard her moan as he impaled her on his cock. "Oh Lord, Penny, it never felt like this with Amy or Bernadette. You sure know how to fuck."

She giggled, "There, I got you to say it, now do it; do it till we both cum! Yes, yes, yes, just like that, don't slow up, fuck me, fuck me hard and fast!" She let out another gasp and fucked herself tighter to his driving piston.

He swayed around as his cock poked and prodded at areas of her pussy rarely reached in the past.

She wrapped her arms and legs around him, "Oh, fuck meeee! It feels like you're splitting me in two with that gorgeous cock of yours." She held him tightly as her moans and groans turned louder and to words unable to be deciphered. Her knees came up and battered his ribs as she met his thrusts with movements that only made him fuck her harder. All of a sudden she released him, dropping her legs and arms to the mattress and she screamed out, "Oh fuckkkkkk! I'm cummmmmmming!" Her entire body began to shake and a loud groan escaped her throat. Her tits were slick with sweat and her cherry red nipples were so hard, they ached.

Sheldon's balls began to churn as he felt them release their potent cream. He felt it surge through his shaft and he pumped harder and faster. He shoved his tongue into her mouth and cupping her ass cheeks, he held her quaking body hard against his as he began pumping her cunt full of his hot, molten cum.

Penny was gasping for air, her thighs jerked involuntarily as she felt his hot cum fill her cunt. She rained kisses all over his sweaty face and neck. She clung to him as she finally wrapped her arms around him again. She wiggled her body against his, "I'm gonna miss this once Leonard returns home."

He rose up on his shaking arms and felt a rush of cool air between their bodies, "Mmmm. me too, but with Amy and me now sexually active, we can always persuade them to do a little mate swapping."

She giggled, "Well Sheldon Lee Cooper, you do have a wicked bone in your body. Now let me up, after all of that hot sex, I need a shower, wanna join me?"

He chuckled and rolled over onto his back, "I would, but I don't have the strength to move. Maybe I'll catch you before you finish."

She climbed out and giggled when she saw him taking in her lush, peaches and cream body. She showered and dried off. She came back into the bedroom and found him fast asleep. She covered his naked body with his comforter. Gathering up her clothes, but somehow she missed taking her panties that were sitting on Sheldon's dresser; she dressed in the living room and snuck out and returned to her apartment. She really did miss Leonard, but Sheldon was the perfect diversion while he was away.

Back in the North Sea, Leonard realized he upset Penny and tried to get her back on the phone, but it went to voicemail. He turned and Mandy Chow grabbed him and planted a hot, wet kiss on his lips. His thoughts of Penny vanished instantly. He had a thing about Asian women and after striking out with the girl from North Korea, he had that unfulfilled yearling. Mandy Chow was shoving her tongue down his throat and he wasn't going down without swinging. They were seated on the bed in her cabin; Leonard stood up and pulled his cock from his pants. He stroked the stiff shaft and Mandy licked her lips. She was wondering if she could fit that thick cock into her tiny Asian pussy. She couldn't take her eyes off of it, she looked up at him, "It's very thick; would you like to have me suck it?"

He chuckled, "Is that a trick question? I want it in you, in your mouth and in your pussy. Why do you ask, don't you want that too?"

She looked down at it again and just nodded and licking her lips whispered out, "Oh yessssss, Leonard." She sank to her knees and licked the head of his stiff cock. His hands reached down and caressed her tits as she grasped his cock in both hands and popped it into her mouth. She began to suck on it hungrily as he closed his eyes and rocked back and forth from the movement of the ship. Her fingers gently massaged his balls until she could feel them become hard and ready. Her hands worked steadily as her head bobbed back and forth with the movement of the ship.

He gripped her silky, black ponytail, "Faster, Mandy, faster and I'll fill your mouth with my hot, creamy cum!"

This turned Mandy on like nothing she ever imagined. She sucked him harder and faster, until she felt his cock swell and the first blast landed on her active tongue. She swallowed hard and fast.

Leonard threw his head back and groaned out, "Here it is Mandy, swallow it and get ready for more." He pushed forward and the spurting head was lodged in her throat. She felt the next blast hit the back of her throat and she pulled back, she wanted to taste it even more then the first blast. She held the thick mushroomed head in her mouth and allowed his weaker blasts to coat her tongue. She circled the root of his cock with her tiny fingers, they didn't meet, but she still stroked it firmly from root to her lips. She drained his nuts and continued to suck and flick the shaft with her slime covered tongue. She released his cock and smacked her lips, "Mmmm, so tell me Leonard, is it my turn now?"

He let out a groan, "Oh don't you know it Mandy! Never let it be said that Leonard Hofstadter doesn't reciprocate. It's time to bear down and get naked!"

She took a step back, "Work on your own clothes, I can strip naked faster." She crossed her arms and pulled the large bulky knit sweater off her trim, petite body. She wasn't wearing a bra and tearing open her jeans, she skimmed them, along with her panties to her feet. She kicked them aside, along with her shoes and socks.

A naked Leonard leaned against the bulkhead and stared at her light brown body. His cock was already regaining some of its stiffness, "Oh my God, you look good enough to eat. I don't know where to start; all of you look like it's in need of my mouth and hands."