Surrounded Ch. 04

"Matt," she paused, her tone still calm, but getting slightly frustrated by my stubbornness. "Will you be able to live like this? Live your life torturing yourself for having physical needs that your wife can't keep up with? Your body knows what it wants. Your mind knows what it wants, it's practically screaming it at you! You won't be able to deny these needs forever. They WILL explode out of you eventually, and if you wait too long, some underserving interloper will be the one on the receiving end." the nun warned.

"This... this doesn't seem right," I said, deeply uncomfortable by this odd conversation.

"Do you want peace of mind, Matt?" Sister Jodie asked calmly. "Isn't that why you came here today?"

"Yes," I replied, my voice a whisper.

"The peace you seek will not come through monogamy," the nun said. "As much as you love your wife, it is clear that she will never give you what you truly need. If you want to live a normal life, if you don't want to be tortured anymore, the answer is simple... You need to keep cheating on your wife."

"What?" I asked, incredulous. "I... I don't think this is right. I really don't think this is right," I said. This seemed insane. Who was this nun? What kind of message was she spreading? And in the back of my head, the deep pulsing rhythm of lust, a pressure I was trying to stifle. I could almost see Aisha's luscious body in my periphery, daring me to gaze. But I resisted.

"Imagine how good your life could be if you could get everything you wanted," Sister Jodie said, her smooth, crisp voice a heavy whisper. "You could be at home, and have your nice, sweet, naïve wife giving you the kind of healthy love that fills your heart with warmth. And that's all she needs to be happy. That's all you need to give her. And when you leave her, you visit her sister, or her best friend, and get the kind of raw, nasty pleasure you crave. And then you get to be happy. You get everything you need, and no one gets hurt."

"This isn't right," I repeated. "That isn't who I am," I said, as this nun formed her argument about who I truly was. "I didn't come here to feel good about having sex with other women. I came here because I want to be loyal to my wife! I love her, and she deserves to have a man be loyal to her. I'm not one of those guys who just got married but never intended to stay loyal. I want to be loyal! Monogamous. I want to be a good person! I don't want to cheat on my wife anymore!"

"Wait... you don't?" the nun asked, confused.

"No! I don't know how I could have been clearer about that!" I affirmed. "Now can you help me with that, or should I just leave? Because this church doesn't seem like the type of place it should be..."

For this moment, that deep, reverberating beat in my head disappeared. This moment of pure loyalty caused the image of Aisha's luscious black body to disappear from my consciousness.

"Well..." the nun paused for a while, taking my argument in. "That definitely complicates things." I shook my head. Why was her first thought that I wanted help cheating? Again, I ask... what kind of church was this? "Well, either way, your path forward is the same. You said you are being haunted by the image of this stripper. This gorgeous, hot-bodied black woman. Aisha. She is clearly resonating with you. I bet she is an amazing woman. She must be. But she is a loose thread in your mind that needs to be taken care of. She's a question you need answered. So... you need to confront her. You need to speak to her. You need to go that club, the one that's haunting you. You need to go to her. If you are the loyal, loving husband you claim to be, then this will be your ultimate test. I suppose if you are able to resist her many charms, then maybe you will finally find the peace you crave. If you have the kind of iron will required to be a good, loyal husband, then you will be able to watch her dance for you without consequence. Because you will need her to dance for you, in privacy, just you and her. You will NEED to have her strip for you, to take off all of her clothes so you can gaze at every inch of her naked, sexy black body. And then, only then, if you can walk away, then you have a chance to a good husband. Then you just might have the will to resist these attractive women. Then, I suppose, it will be revealed that your path to bliss is found in monogamy, not in these arms of these beautiful seductresses, despite how attractive you find their filthy ways."

"You don't seem convinced?" I inquired.

"You're right, I'm not," Sister Jodie said. "From the sound of your voice, and the adventures you've had, and the type of women you've been able to pull, I have no doubt that you are a very attractive man. Even I have to admit that I find you very sexy. I mean, on a different day, it could have been me on the other end of these crazy adventures, but I digress. The point I'm making is that you have to look at the evidence here. You love sex! You are driven by sex! You need real, raw, nasty sex! You only had these problems once you stopped cheating on your wife. I bet you lived your life just fine with a clear head when you were screwing these other girls. But when you stopped, all that testosterone backed up, bubbling inside you, rising to a boil, driving you crazy. And if it keeps going on like this, not only will you cheat on your wife anyway, but you will be in such a crazed state that even your wife will surely notice," the nun said. Despite my confusion, her words resonated. They sounded true, despite my objections. But it just seemed so wrong. "If you want a normal life, you have to have to sex with other women. Women who are not your wife. What you need to do is find a way balance your need for a normal home with your nasty desires for amazing sex with gorgeous, busty women."

"No, no, this isn't true," I replied. "I know it all sounds bad, but I'm really a good person!" I know it sounded weak after all the bad things that I had done, but I still felt like there was a good person at the core of me.

"You speak as if it is these women who did something to you... as if they spread their corrupt, sinful ways onto you. I would argue that this is something that has always been inside you. It may have manifested in ways you didn't fully understand, and it's only been truly brought to the surface now. But it's always been there," she paused. She spoke as if she understood me, as if she knew this was a thing I had struggled with in my younger days. And the truth was I had. I had screwed around with these bad, nasty women before when I was in college. I had struggled even then in dealing with the affections of aggressive, slutty women. Even though I was raised normally, it seemed like this darkness was always there, calling to me like a siren's song. She couldn't have known that, but she came to that conclusion anyway. Was she right about me? "And these clever, scheming, gorgeous and brilliant women... they simply lit the fuse. Their gorgeous, lustful bodies, their large, soft, succulent breasts... they tempted you into sin, but they also tempted you into becoming what you really are. What's left for you is to embrace it..." the nun advised.

"I don't think that's true," I affirmed. "I just want to be a good, normal person. A good husband. A good man..."

"Our church advocates that truly embracing your needs is that path to true bliss. To salvation. Matt. As long as everyone involved is happy and willing, what you do in the bedroom doesn't change that path. A good sex life is the key to bliss. To find that balance between making your wife happy and making many other women even happier is what will make you a good man. That is what will make you truly happy. At peace, finally. That is your path. I think if you can just accept your need for hot, sweaty sex, everyone in your life will be in true bliss. Doesn't that just sound right, Matt?"

I paused, taking her words in. As messed up as it seemed, her path would also give me everything I wanted. So, for that reason, I decided to hear her out. The beat in my head, the signifier of the pressure of the sexual need I felt, returned, reverberating in my skull. The image of Aisha stripping for me reappeared, hidden by a haze.

"Let me prove it to you, Matt," she began. "Tell me... are you thinking about sex right now?" she asked, and the loud rhythmic beat in my head got louder. The image of Aisha stripping for me for became clearer. I stayed silent, and that gave the nun the answer she wanted.

"You are in a confessional booth, talking about how much you regret cheating on your wife, and you still just can't stop thinking about FUCKING other women!" the nun said sharply, her curse stunning me into silence. "That's right, Matt, you're a dirty, dirty boy. You like hearing me talk like this, don't you?" Her smooth voice had become decidedly sensuous, and hearing this nasty tone coming from a nun, the contrast of that, it made my cock as hard as a brick in my pants. "I'm gonna straighten your head out, Matt, and to do that, I will talk in the only language you seem to understand. The language of a complete and total fucking slut! Now, when I ask you a question, I don't want any stammering. No denials. Only the truth!" she insisted, her tone firm. There was a long, heated silence before I spoke up.

"Okay..." I croaked out.

"Tell me, Matt..." Sister Jodie began, savoring her words. "Are you thinking about sex right now, Matt?" I looked towards the divider, and I could see some of the nun's features in the dim booth next to me. She looked relatively young, maybe only a few years older than me, and very beautiful, even obscured in the shadows.

"Yes," I answered, unable to deny the truth.

"With who? Which of these spectacular, gorgeous, sexy women are you fantasizing about?" the nun asked. I stayed silent for a moment. "Is it Katie, your beautiful, cunning, and busty sister-in-law?" I flashed to a scene with Katie. Me, behind Katie, fucking her roughly, making her big tits jiggle, her cackling like a witch as she made fun of her younger sister. "Or Michelle, your wife's sexy, skanky best friend?" I flashed onto Michelle, her bent over on all fours as I fucked her tight ass, as she moaned deeply from this blissful pleasure. The sight of her ass swallowing my thick meet made me shiver. "Perhaps you're even fantasizing about me?"

I was stunned into silence by this bold claim. Where did this come from?

"Are you so filthy that you would fantasize about having sex with a nun while confessing your sins?" Sister Jodie asked.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh, don't be naïve, Matt," the nun stated. "You can't deny our obvious chemistry. You have to be feeling this too. I certainly am. You don't have to act so innocent with me, baby," I was incredulous. But despite my objections, I couldn't stop my mind from going to work. I imagined me and the nun together, in her booth, pushed up against the wall, her legs wrapped around me. She screamed and moaned in my ear as I roughly drilled her.

"Oh my goodness, you are, aren't you? My God, you are truly filthy..." she claimed.

"No..." I denied weakly.

"You're not? Well, then, I have to say I'm offended, Matt. You clearly fantasize about all these other women, so... why not me?" the nun asked. "Do you not think I'm sexy?" she asked, her tone smooth like honey.

"Uh, well, it's not that, but..." I stammered.

"So, you do think I'm sexy?" Sister Jodie asked, sounding more like a love-struck teenage slut than a nun in a church.

"No, it's... you're a nun!" I announced. She paused for a moment, taking this in.

"Would it change things if you knew I was pinching my nipples the entire time you were confessing?"

"What!?" I said, stunned.

"What if I told you that I just to reach under my habit and pull aside my thong so I could touch myself, because your adventures made me so fucking wet..." the nun said. My face felt hot as I heard the nun confess to her own filthy behavior. I was stunned, but my cock was loving this new depth of filth. I was as hard as iron.

"What if I told you I have big breasts? Just as big as all these amazing sluts who tempt you so... maybe even bigger," Sister Jodie said, and through the divider, I could see her licking her lips. I gulped deeply. "FF-cups, and perky as hell. They're so round... and smooth... and soft... and they so want to be squeezed, Matt. What if I told you if you played your cards right, I would let you see them bare, right fucking now?" I began to panic slightly, looking around, looking to escape, and as I did, I heard a smooth, crisp laugh coming from her. "What if I told you that, at some point in the very near future, you will be emptying your heavy nuts into my eager cunt!"

My eyes widened. A nun just said the word cunt to me. She was telling me she expected us to have sex, mere moments after offering to show me her massive tits. I was absolutely stunned by this whole encounter, but my disobedient cock was straining for release.

"What... what are you talking about?" I stammered.

"Hahaha..." she giggled in response. "You see how easy it was for me, Matt?" the nun asked, her tone seemingly reverting to normal. "You see how easy how easy it was for me to make those troubles disappear? You see how easy it was to take control of you using sex?"

"Uh..." I panted, unable to find words. "Was... was that all serious?" I asked.

"Matt, I'm a nun," she said, still laughing. "If you want to see if I was truly being serious, ask to see my breasts, and you will receive your answer..." she said vaguely, her tone unreadable. I didn't want to push it any further, still unclear about what game she was playing. "I am simply trying to prove the point that despite all your denials, you will always need crazy, messed up, filthy god damn sex. That will never disappear."

I let her words hang in the air. Her gambit had worked. Despite the inner strength I had found, it all disappeared the first moment I was teased by a gorgeous women. I couldn't even see this nun, but with her confidence, and her manner of speaking, I had no doubt she was gorgeous and sexy. The type of woman whose charms I kept falling prey too. And I had no doubt her tits were as big as she claimed. I just knew. Like she said, she could have very well been one of the women on the other end of these misadventures. And, if she was truly nasty, like I suspected, the possibility of sex wasn't off the table, despite her being a nun.

"You came here for advice... let me tell you what to do, again" she began. "The woman who has been haunting you, this Aisha... she is the key. You will find your destiny when you gaze your eyes across her luscious, naked black skin. Before going to your wife, before even speaking to her, you need to resolve this issue. Ignore your wife, go to the strip club, and go face your destiny. In the flesh."

"I'm not what you think I am," I affirmed, resisting both the dancing black woman haunting my head and the nun who thought so little of me. "You're wrong about me."

"Well, maybe so," the nun began, before her tone turned sensual again. "But I'm pretty confident I'm correct, Matt. And when I'm proven right, come back here. Ask for me, Sister Jodie. We'll go out for drinks, and you will tell me each and every one of your nasty fantasies, in great, great detail. And if you play your cards right, I'll let you live each and every one of them out with me," she announced, making me gulp. "And if you're as good as all these women seem to think you are, I might even introduce you to the Mother Superior. She's a brilliant woman, absolutely brilliant. And she has big tits, just like me, so I already know you'll like her. I expect Catherine would take a big shine to you. We could teach you so much..."

With that, I stood up and stepped out, eager to leave this twisted nun and her strange church behind. As I did, I looked around, and some more nuns had appeared. They were all about my age, some a bit younger, some a bit older, but they were all beautiful. And they were all looking at me, staring at me with their hypnotic gaze. I shook my head, looked down, and tried to resist sprinting out of there. As I escaped the chapel, I heard a familiar, sensuous voice call out to me.

"Call me!" Sister Jodie announced, but I didn't turn back.

This church where I once worshipped had been corrupted. I went in looking for assistance from a place that had always given me strength. Instead, I had a nun tell me to cheat on my wife before offering to show me her tits. I would find no sanctuary there. And, with every turn I made coming up empty, it seemed like I would find no sanctuary anywhere.

***************

The next few days were a blur. It was hard to focus, even despite my heavy workload. It was hard to focus on anything when the image of a luscious, hot-bodied black woman shaking her hot body for me was crystal clear in the front of my mind.

Ever since my trip to the church, Aisha had been the only thing on my mind. Any resolve I had built up had been obliterated by my conversation with that warped nun. I knew her words were insane. I knew that. Some insane ravings of the warped vessel of some off-shoot church. The Church of Light? I looked them up online, and the only things I found out was that they were extremely new, and that members of the main church had decried them publically.

Despite all that, my experience there had affected me. Like I said, I knew what she had said was insane, but... her words did resonate with me somewhat. I admit there was a twisted logic to her suggestions. You know, like... face your fear. In that sense, the idea of facing down Aisha made sense. Marching into that strip club, watching her dance, and then marching back out did have some logic to it. Seeing her bare skin, seeing those huge tits and her round ass... seeing the delectable body that had haunted my dreams in the flesh... it was a tempting idea. Of course, that was the problem, I was putting myself in position to be seduced. I would be the fly deliberately landing in the spider's web. But wasn't that the point? Wasn't that the whole problem, not knowing if I could withstand this seduction? If I just ripped the band-aid off and tested myself, if I put myself in position to be seduced and was able to resist, wouldn't that put an end to this? To the indecision in my brain? If I could face down the seduction and come out still loyal, would I be able to have the life I wanted? Or would I be the fool marching to his own doom?

So, despite the madness of Sister Jodie, our conversation had put Aisha to the top of my mind, and she wasn't going away. It seemed like every moment, I saw her meaty round ass-cheeks exposed in a thong. Or her big, bouncy tits jiggling in front of me, bursting to be free of her stretchy bra. I would see her plump lips twisted into a smirk, or her hypnotizing eyes holding my vision. I would remember how her hot body felt against mine at the bachelor party, or the taste of her tongue against mine from the illicit kiss we shared.

Despite all this, my distracted state freed me up to do some good work professionally. Without being in my own head, my troubled brain gave me a weird sort of instinctual business acumen, which served me well, allowing me to knock out the negotiations in rapid time. This would allow me to make it home just in time for my anniversary. This made me happy, knowing I could cook up one hell of a surprise for Amanda.

Even though it had only been a year, it felt like much longer. So much had happened since then. So much had changed. I was a much more a different man than the one I was when I walked down the aisle. I was much more, um... worldly. More cynical and jaded. I had seen some shit. I had done some shit. I had had a lot of sex, done some sick fucked up things in the bedroom, with women who were not my wife, and I had loved it. What the hell had happened to me? I could only hope I could find a way to go back and be the man I was a year prior. Be the man that Amanda married.