The Reluctant Journey Ch. 12

"You want to know a secret?" Gwen nodded. "All you have to do to get me to do whatever you want is ask me the way you just did. If you use that against me the playing field is going to be completely skewed in your favor for the rest of our lives."

"The rest of our lives?" Gwen nervously bit her lip.

Tristan smiled, his face lit up and he didn't look the slightest bit tired anymore. "Exactly."

She smiled. "And what is my incentive to comply with your request?"

"You want to discuss incentives?" He grinned and she laughed.

"Exactly."

"What is it you want, sweetheart?"

She looked at him seriously. "I want to make love to you Tristan." The self-reflection and over analysis had went out the door, but she didn't regret it in the least. She knew exactly what she wanted and she had every intention of making it happen. None of the consequences were deal-breakers. She wasn't sure she would ever come across something that would be a deal-breaker when it came to Tristan.

His expression lost all of its amusement suddenly and she felt a twinge of nervousness in her gut. He moved his hand to her chin and tilted her head up. Her unease dissipated when she realized he wasn't unamused because he was rejecting her. His eyes were deliciously lustful as he looked down at her. He looked slightly dangerous in the most confusingly arousing way. He leaned down and kissed her slowly. It was just as amazing as she'd remembered from before being interrupted by the construction team. She wanted every part of him. She wanted to give every part of herself. She raised her arm to grasp around his neck only to wince in pain again. He immediately stopped and pulled back.

"As much as I would love to fulfill your request, and I would love to...desperately. You are in no shape for such...amorous activity." Tristan looked like he wanted to contradict himself and continue their activity very badly. She knew him well enough to know that he would not follow through on his desire. He would wait until she healed completely, and probably wait a little longer to ensure her complete health. He was a gentlemen to a fault sometimes.

She sighed. "As much as I hate to admit it, you're probably right. My arm really hurts when I move it, and the the coughing up blood thing wasn't especially relieving."

"The doctor said that might happen because they had to remove a little of your lung." Tristan assured her.

She nodded. The silence was awkward. She didn't know what to say now. She felt very vulnerable and uncomfortable. She knew it was unreasonable but she inevitably felt rejected and very undesirable.

Tristan studied her face carefully. "What are you thinking?"

She shook her head. "Nothing." She was sure her cheeks were bright red by now.

"Are you embarrassed?" He sounded surprised and slightly amused.

Her immediate response was to deny it, but for some reason she didn't. "I..I..maybe I..No." Okay so she wasn't going to win a medal for bravery.

He frowned at her and in continuance with her cowardice she looked down at her hands in her lap. He sighed heavily and sat on the side of the bed. She looked up at him when she felt his weight suddenly shift the mattress. "Gwen, we didn't get to talk as much as I would have liked before. I know that we said that we were going to move slowly but I think that that was pretty much shot to hell. Um..pardon the very unintentional pun." He sounded and looked distraught. "I was terrified, more than a casual, take-it-slow, somewhat-boyfriend has any right to be. I want to have the right to feel concerned for you. I want to know the answers to the forms I had to fill out when you were admitted. I don't want to have to look you up like an employee. What I'm saying is, that I don't want to take it slow, not at all. However, you were just shot twice and took about ten years off of my life, so as much as I would love to have my way with you, it will have to wait until you have the normal amount of holes in your body."

Gwen giggled at the very uncharacteristic racy remark. "Wow, my gentleman suitor seems to have been replaced by an uncivilized rake."

He grinned. "If your delicate sensibilities are shaken now my lady, just wait a fortnight or so. I predict you shall be positively shocked."

She laughed and her self-consciousness melted away. "I don't want to take things slow either."

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Malia got to visit Gwen two days after she woke up. They spent at least an hour talking about their respective series of events. Malia was going stir crazy and it didn't help that upon arriving at Gwen's room she found out that she was preparing to leave the hospital.

"You get to go home?" Malia asked outraged.

"Yeah." Gwen smiled. "Tristan influenced them a little. I will still have to stay in the basement of the manor with all of the hospital equipment. You don't get to leave?"

"No." Malia grumbled. "Cain influenced them too, only in the other direction. I'm fine, but he doesn't want to rush anything." She sulked. "But I'm very happy for you." Malia tacked on, smiling sincerely. "How are things with Tristan going?"

Gwen smiled. "He's very diligent."

Malia giggled. "I bet."

"Once I heal completely I think he'll ease up a little, but right now he's kind of, maybe a little bit overbearing." She said it guiltily.

"It must be in his blood." Malia grumbled.

Gwen laughed. "I can imagine. Cain was very distraught when he spoke with me. It was by far the most out of control I've ever seen him."

"It scared him. I get that. But he can't be scared forever. I can't stay locked up in the hospital forever so he's sure nothing will ever happen to me. Plus I hate hospitals." Malia's face paled as she looked at the bandage covered wound on Gwen's shoulder.

Gwen nodded. "I can understand where they are coming from though. If the situation had been reversed, if Tristan had been shot..I don't think I would be quick to get over that."

Malia thought about Cain being tortured in her place. It was hard to imagine anyone overpowering him and she knew his pride would never let him give into something like that. He would have acted more honorably. The mental pictures made her uneasy. "You're right, like always. But Cain can't get his way anymore. I am leaving this hospital with or without his permission."

"Uh oh." Gwen smiled.

Malia grinned back. She hugged her friend gingerly to avoid hurting her. "I'll see you soon, back at home."

Gwen looked slightly worried. "I hope you know what you're doing."

Malia laughed. "Why start now?"

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"Finn I need to ask a favor." Malia had been waiting to get him alone for hours.

"Yes?" He looked justifiably suspicious.

"I need to get out of here and I was wondering if I could go to your house for a while?"

"My house?" He raised his brow.

"Yes."

"What about Cain?"

"What about him?"

"Malia" he said with a warning tone.

"Finn, please. Will you please help me get out of here? I need to talk to Cain, but I can't do it here. Your house is the only place we ever really communicated semi-successfully."

He frowned and stared at her for a moment. "Okay." He agreed finally. "But we have to hurry. He wont be gone long."

Malia grinned. "Thank you Finn, I owe you." He just grunted in response.

Getting out of the hospital was surprisingly easy. Malia had envisioned a spy-like sneaking out scenario, but she was able to be discharged simply by asking. She even charmed the nurses and doctors into speeding up the process. She was out in thirty minutes. She was surprised to find out Finn did not only drive black SUVs, his own vehicle was a dark blue pickup truck. Though they'd been weaning her pain medication for days, she started to feel the wounds on her back during the long drive to Finn's secluded cabin. He got a phone call during the drive that she imagined was from Cain, because he looked at the phone and sighed before ignoring it. It rang several more times after that. Malia's stomach started to turn. Was this such a good idea? Most definitely not, but she'd already gotten the ball rolling.

"Do you think he'll come after us?" she finally broke the silence.

"Us?" Finn smirked. Her head shot over to face him accusingly. He laughed lightly. "I thought you two were in a relationship of sorts? You sound almost scared Malia." He was clearly enjoying himself at her expense.

She bit her lip nervously. "I'm just not sure of what his reaction will be."

"Well, he's not going to be happy."

"Yeah, that's what I'm worried about."

"I thought you had a plan?" He sounded more unsure than amused.

"Of course I do," Malia defended, "I'm going to reason with him."

Finn sighed heavily. "Shit."

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Malia only got to pace Finn's living room for twenty minutes before Cain showed up, flinging gravel with his motorcycle. She was too cowardly to meet him outside. Cain stomped up the stairs and flung open the front door without knocking. Malia felt like sneaking out the back door. He was very mad at her. But that wasn't an excuse for him to play dictator, especially a coddling benevolent dictator. She wanted things to go back to the normal they were becoming when they'd been at the cabin before. She needed some kind of balance in power. She had renewed most of her strength when he confronted her in the living room. Unfortunately, Finn spoke first.

"Careful with the door there killer."

Cain glared at him in response. "You seem to have turned off your phone."

"Damn signal out here." Finn shrugged.

"Bullshit." Cain growled. He turned to Malia." What the hell are you doing out of the hospital?" He was yelling now.

Okay she could handle this. She took a deep breath. He interrupted her.

"Come on Malia, I'd never pegged you as stupid before."

She frowned. "Excuse me? Are you kidding me right now." All of her unease melted away into annoyance. "You are completely unreasonable!"

"I'm unreasonable? You snuck out of the hospital behind my back!" He stood right in front of her now.

"I didn't sneak out, they let me out. You know, the doctors, the people professionally trained to determine who needs to be in the hospital and who doesn't!"

"You knew exactly what you were doing Malia."

"Yes. Yes I did. I was making my own decision. As for me going behind your back, I'm sorry that that was necessary."

"Necessary?" He said it like an expletive.

"Yes! You would never have let me leave that hospital room!"

"Malia, don't be ridiculous." At least he wasn't yelling now.

She took a breath and tried to calm herself. "Cain, I know that you've been through a lot recently. But I refuse to let you bully me around. Finn said that I could stay with him until I get on my feet." She noticed that Finn had left the room, she couldn't decide if he was being polite or a coward.

"The fuck you are!" he was yelling again.

"Cain!" she yelled back at him. "I love you! But I am not going to follow you like a soldier damn it!"

"Malia, you are going to be my wife and the mother of my children and you will damn well obey me!"

"What?" She didn't have the breath to yell.

"You heard me!" He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up to meet his forceful mouth.

"Cain? You can't...I wont..." He kissed her again.

"I most certainly can and will marry you my love."

She frowned at him. "I wont obey you." She sounded sulky.

He laughed. "What's new?"

"And I hope you don't consider that a formal proposal."

He grinned. "I think this is going to be fun."

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"Jack." Cain called across the library.

"Cain." Jack replied stoically. Being in such close proximity recently hadn't done well for mending their relationship.

"I needed to speak with you about something." Cain inwardly cursed himself for not starting with the question as he'd planned. He would never admit to it, but Jack made him more nervous than anyone since his own father.

"Yes?" Jack looked up from a large book that sat on the table in front of him.

Cain sat across from Jack at the antique table. "I want to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage." He knew his face would betray nothing, but his palms were sweaty, clasped firmly underneath the table.

Jack frowned slightly. "Have you already asked Malia?"

"Yes." Cain answered unenthusiastically.

"And she said yes?"

"It was implied."

Jack arched his brow. "Than why are you asking my permission Cain?"

Damn it, he didn't want to do this. "Jack, I've lost most of my family either through death or alienation. Your daughter has reminded me of the importance of family. I don't want her to have to choose between marrying me and being a part of her family because I'm not confident that I would win that battle. I'm not noble Jack. I make mistakes all the time and I've hurt Malia repeatedly and you will never know how much I hate myself for that. But I do love her. I want to marry her and have a family with her." Surprisingly Cain felt his face heat up during his spiel and his eyes became watery, though, thankfully, he didn't shed a tear. "Cain, I would be honored to have you as a son." Jack replied just as seriously as he'd started.

Cain looked confused.

"As much as I hate to admit it, you are a good man. You are more noble than you give yourself credit for. You saved my daughter's life and you stood by her side. I could see it then. I knew that you two loved each other. And even though you're bull-headed, a pain in the ass, and much too prideful for your own good, I wont stand in my daughter's way." Jack stood and Cain followed suit. "Welcome to the family Cain." The two men shook hands and Cain could tell an alliance of sorts was formed.

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Cain was surprisingly calm as he walked into Eli McAllister's office. His actions in dealing with Blake Denizen were enough to have him demoted if not arrested. He just couldn't bring himself to care, probably because he couldn't bring himself to regret it. Obviously he didn't want to be arrested as it would take him away from his brother, fiancée, and new family. But he wasn't sure if he would care much about losing his job. He had plenty of money, he would have more time.

"Cain," Eli greeted him with a one-armed hug. Cain was surprised.

"Eli," He said stupidly.

"Please sit Cain." Cain complied and Eli sat behind his desk. "I called you here to formally apologize for the actions of former unit director Blake Denizen. Cain if we would have known he was so involved in a personal vendetta against you, something would have been done. I am taking full responsibility as I was the one who took the phone call he made enquiring disciplinary action against you, I should have investigated. I'm sorry Cain."

"General McAllister, permission to speak freely?"

"Of course, son."

"Aren't I in trouble here?" Cain was confused.

"In trouble?"

"Yes. I violated Denizen's civil rights in the, um, methods I used to interrogate him." "The bastard deserved it as far as I'm concerned." Eli smirked, "Besides, civil rights aren't what they used to be. Under the new order the government probably had more power than it should, but until that changes I have the right to interrogate my men anyway I damn well see fit. You were acting under my order." Eli smiled at him.

"That sounds awfully shady." Cain frowned.

Eli shrugged. "Cain, the government isn't what it used to be, yet. It's going to reach an equilibrium in power eventually, but right now? Not so much. So, while I still have the power to do so, I'm validating all prior interrogation tactics on your part. How about you thank me and enjoy it?"

Cain nodded. "Yes, sir. Thank you sir." Eli was right, a lot of work needed to be done. Cain realized his time as a general wasn't up yet. He had a personal obligation to make sure those freedoms were given. He would make it his mission to see every unit freed and successfully integrated back into society. It wouldn't be easy, but what life mission was? Cain had a lot of hard work ahead of him but with a clear purpose he felt ready to take on the task. He felt rejuvenated.

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Gwen was going crazy. Every night she staying in the hospital bed in the basement she would think about Tristan. He'd offered to sleep in the basement with her, in another bed of course. Though she'd been tempted, she insisted he stay in his current bed. The bed in the basement wasn't nearly as comfortable as Tristan's would be. Every time she thought about his bed she got very nervous. It had been three long weeks and she couldn't take it anymore. Gwen felt fine, yet Tristan insisted she still needed more time. Not if she had anything to do about it.

By the time Gwen reached Tristan's closed door she was slightly winded do to her recent lack of physical activity. She opened the door before her nerves got the best of her. The room was surprisingly dimly lit. Tristan immediately looked at her from the couch in his living area. He had been reading.

"Gwen, what are you doing up here?" He moved quickly to get up, but she held up her hand.

"No, stay there." she walked over to him after closing the door. As she'd been meticulously planning for days, she had had time to ask Malia to bring her her cream silk robe that came to right above her knees. She was very proud of it. It was the only article of clothing she had on and she nervously fidgeted with the tight knot at the waist.

"Gwen?" He repeated when she just stood there in front of him stupidly. She couldn't get the damned knot undone. Her hands weren't working on the slippery material from the sweat that had collected on her palms. She clumsily pulled the garment over her head with some difficulty. She imagined the scene looked quite funny, but Tristan wasn't smiling when she looked down at him. He looked at her everywhere. She mounted his lap to avoid getting even more nervous, though what she felt when she lowered herself onto him didn't exactly calm her nerves. Electric excitement flashed through her in equal parts as pure unease. She wasn't sure she could follow through with this.

"Not that I mind or anything, but what are you doing?" His voice was deeper than usual and his eyes were darker.

"If you have to ask I'm probably not doing it right." Gwen's own voice surprised her, it was huskier as well.

Tristan gave a cynical laugh. He grabbed her hand and moved it down to the crotch of his pants. She gasped when she felt him underneath his pants. "I beg to differ." His expression was between a smile and a wince. "But I meant, why are you up here tonight?"

She turned her wrist and grabbed the hand that had encircled her own. She moved his hand slightly up and between her legs. Though she gasped when he made contact, she was able to speak. "This is why. I can't stand it anymore." She knew he could feel the hot wetness there. It had been a constant inconvenience for almost three weeks now, every time she thought of him.

His smile had disappeared completely. His brows were cinched together tightly. His hand moved seemingly without the consent of his mind. She let go of his wrist to cling to his shoulders with both of her hands for balance. "Are you sure?" He asked quickly, in almost a growl. She nodded shakily. His thumb found her clit and her spine instinctually arched as she hissed out a breath. "Ohmygosh."

"You're so fucking beautiful." His usually eloquent voice sounded so sexy when he was out of control. He kissed her harshly and passionately and his hand that wasn't busy moved up to her breasts.

She couldn't concentrate and it was amazing. Finally she made her hands work the buttons of his shirt. After fumbling for a while his own hands came up and ripped the shirt open, popping every button off. She smiled and finally felt his exposed chest. He was so hard and defined. With his hand out from underneath her she sank down onto his lap and ground against him. She could feel his thick erection pulse through his thin pants. She grabbed his face and kissed him for all she was worth.