A Modern Love Story

But I could still talk, of course. "Does that feel good, Kelly?"

"Yes, Ben. It does." There was a real emphasis on the last word. She was looking at me through heavy lidded eyes. One particularly powerful thrust caused her to involuntarily close them.

"Do you love that big cock of his?"

"Yes."

"And do you love it when it's deep inside you?"

She spoke very softly, "Yes, I do!"

"And when you're full of his spunk?"

"Yes!"

"Really?"

"Yes, really, Ben. I love it!"

"Well don't just tell me, Kelly. Tell him!"

She was looking into my eyes as she spoke to him; her words interspersed with soft moans. "I love your cock, Carl. It's the most wonderful cock in the whole world. I love it when you fuck me, when you stretch me and most of all when I feel you're trying to split me in two. And I love it when you cum in me. I love it, Carl and I want to be full of it!" She really meant it, too.

I will never forget the way she looked at me as he continued to fuck her. At that moment she would have allowed him to fuck her to death, so powerful was her sexual excitement. She could only groan as he continued to pound into her, her breasts vibrating with each thrust. I moved towards her and I kissed her on her lips. She kissed me back with incredible passion. Carl watched us kiss and he increased both the power and the speed of his strokes, almost as if he were angry. I could feel the shock waves coursing through her body from the epicentre that was her vagina. Sensing that my prick was erect she placed my hand on it silently encouraging me to masturbate alongside her. She then began to finger herself and very soon she experienced a massive orgasm. Carl gave one last almighty thrust and I could feel his convulsions as he ejaculated into her. My own hand was busy but not for long, and so forceful was my ejaculation that much of my semen landed on Kelly. She kissed me intensely once more before pulling away to turn her head and to kiss Carl, her hand round his buttocks in a gesture that was more affectionate than sexual. Our passion had been fierce but it had also been fully satiated and it wasn't long before we were all dozing on our respective sun beds.

That evening we were all sitting down having a drink before we went out to eat. Kelly looked ravishing. She had her hair up in that delightful way of hers and was fully made up. She was wearing a green top and loose skirt that buttoned all the way down. She had done up enough buttons to protect her modesty, but most of her thighs were visible as the skirt parted when she sat down. Her nipples were already erect in the slightly cooler evening air. Carl raised his glass to us said how pleased he was that we had come out.

"I know we had that Saturday night together but there was no guarantee we would all get on here. But it has worked out really well. All the same Ben, I can't say I'm sorry that you're going home!"

Kelly interjected at once. "That's not a very nice thing to say, Carl!"

"Sorry, Ben, Don't take it the wrong way. I meant that I'm pleased I'll be able to have Kelly all to myself, that's all."

"It's all right Carl. I guessed that's what you meant."

We went back to the restaurant where we eaten the evening of our first full day here. The intervening ten days had gone so quickly. Much as I tried to enjoy the evening I was only too aware that within twenty-four hours I would be home on my own.

Kelly slept with me that night. We made love and afterwards she went to sleep in my arms. In the morning I was getting instructions about what to do when I got home but I wasn't really listening. I was thinking about our relationship. It wasn't that Kelly seemed less affectionate to me, on the contrary. However there were worrying signs that there was more to the relationship between Kelly and Carl than just the obvious physical attraction. There had been occasions when there had seemed to be genuine tenderness between them. I thought about my interrogation of her the day before when she was having sex with him. She had answered yes to every question I had asked but, but there had been one key question that I didn't dare ask, namely whether she loved him. In the throes of her sexual passion she would have answered in the affirmative; of that, I was in no doubt. But I was becoming frightened that she might now say yes, even when she wasn't on the end of his dick.

I kissed her very tenderly and she asked me to make love to her. Afterwards we lay there for a while but unfortunately I had a plane to catch. I told her that I was going to miss her and she said that she'd miss me, too. It was reassuring to think she would miss me but somehow I had my doubts. Kelly would be alone with Carl for the next three days. She'd insisted that she didn't love him, that their relationship was purely physical and it was abundantly clear that there was a very strong physical element to it. Kelly was never more excited than when her fanny was stretched around his cock; except that it wasn't being stretched quite so much now, her once tight fanny was definitely looser. But I was more concerned about her heart and the depth of her feelings for him. Could she really be so intimate with him, yet still remain so detached?

And what about Carl? What had he once said? That she was absolutely gorgeous. The more I thought about it, the sicker I felt. Yet I only had myself to blame! I was the one that had encouraged her to be sexually adventurous and she had only taken me at my word. Carl had brought a new dimension to her sex life, literally as well as metaphorically. And they would be alone together for three whole days. They would have the opportunity to do and to say all kinds of things to each other. Would she still want to come home to me when her holiday was at an end? But what was the alternative? Asking her to come home with me now, assuming that a flight was available, would only postpone the inevitable. At some future point she would have to choose between us. It might just as well be the end of the week. What a fool I'd been!

Chapter 19

We were on our way to the airport. I felt really sad and wished that I had not rejected Kelly's earlier offer to foreshorten her holiday in order to come back with me. But it was too late now. She looked absolutely lovely, too. She was wearing her yellow sundress and sandals of a similar colour. And it was the perfect foil to her deep tan. She'd also put some knickers on! But that was because they were planning to go to Palma once they'd dropped me off and she was adamant that she would not set foot inside the cathedral without any. But I doubted they'd be on for long once they got back to the villa. I sat in the back of the car with her and we held hands all the way. We arrived at the airport all too soon and I got my case out of the boot. I said goodbye to Carl and shook his hand. He had the sensitivity to walk away when I said goodbye to Kelly. "Kelly, you know I really do love you, don't you?"

"I know you do, Ben, and I love you just as much." We kissed each other.

"You won't forget that, will you?" I shouldn't have said this because she looked as if she were about to cry. I had to walk away because there were tears in my eyes too. I had meant to say something profound, something that would make Kelly realise the real depth of my feelings for her and yet all that I had done was to give her the impression that I didn't trust her. I turned to wave goodbye only to see that Carl was already standing at Kelly's side. When he saw me look back he cupped her breast with his hand as if laying claim to her body. Kelly wanted to spare my feelings and I was pleased to see her push his hand away. I walked into the airport cursing the circumstances that had forced my early departure. I was depressed as my plane took off, and my depression seemed to deepen with every mile that separated my beautiful Kelly from me. I knew that I was really going to miss her during the next three days, days that to me would seem never ending. Kelly, on the other hand, would probably spend the whole time shagging and wonder where the time went!

I arrived home in the late evening to a dark unwelcoming house. My mind went back to the last time I had arrived home late, the night Kelly had met Carl. How I wished that I could have turned the clock back. Had I have been able to do so, I would have immediately entered the house and perhaps Kelly might never have had the opportunity to experience sex with Carl. But it was futile exercise, she had! I made myself a drink and went to bed. I sensed that Carl and Kelly would also be going to bed about now. But I made no attempt to masturbate; I could raise neither enthusiasm nor prick. I just wanted Kelly to be here next to me. I did not want her to be in Majorca. But she would be there for three more days. I awoke the following morning only to realise with a sinking heart that the love of my life was not home.

I went off to the meeting that had been the cause of my early departure from Majorca. I didn't say much at the start; my mind was a thousand miles away. In spirit I was once more at the villa, with Kelly. But Carl was there in body, rather than in spirit! And at that very moment he was probably in her body, too! Jealousy and anger were now the dominant emotions. Why did I have to lose Kelly to an arrogant self-centred bastard who had a big cock, but fuck-all else? And to think that Kelly had wanted to end her affair with Carl and I had been the one to persuade her against it. I resolved that I would never be so stupid again. If ever there would be a next time! The voice came into my consciousness; the voice of my boss. "What do you think, Ben?"

"Pardon." I was playing for time and desperately trying to recall what we were talking about.

"I said, 'what is your opinion, Ben.'"

"Sorry, I missed that, Paul. I must have drifted off. Probably the jet lag!"

Patience was not Paul's strong point. "Ben, It's only a two hour flight for Heaven's sake! No-one gets jet lag coming home from Majorca!" Fortunately, that was my only lapse, and the meeting turned out to be quite successful.

That evening when I came home I was, if anything, even more sorry for myself than I had been the night before. I put on an opera that seemed particularly apt, Act 3 of La Boheme. In music that is both beautiful, yet ineffably sad, Rodolfo and Mimi are parting but not before reliving their earlier happier times together. There were tears in my eyes as I sat listening in the empty lounge. I wondered what she would be doing, but just as had happened the night before, there was no sexual excitement to be gained from this inquisitiveness, just an aching sense of emptiness. And I still had forty-six hours to go.

Good Lord! I was counting the hours until I saw her! The last time I had done that we had only just started going out and I had subsequently assumed that it was just the intensity of young love. And yet, here I was ten years later doing exactly the same thing! I woke up Thursday morning. One more day to go! And then it was Friday morning and I was euphoric. She's coming home today! And finally, after the longest eighty hours of my life, it was Friday evening, and Kelly was standing in front of me. Carl had brought her home but he did not come in. She seemed very tired. We kissed hello but she appeared to be pre-occupied. I made us both a drink and we sat down in the kitchen.

She gave every appearance of being Italian, her deep tan emphasising her Latin features. So I spoke to her in Italian. "I amma so 'appy to 'avva you 'ome, Kelly. To be sure, bejasus and begorrah." She didn't have any Irish blood, of course, but I was on a roll and in the mood to show-off.

"Is that so?" She was not amused; on the contrary, she was very abrupt. My mood instantly changed. Relief and happiness were promptly replaced by anxiety, an anxiety bordering on fear.

"What's wrong?" The tension in my voice was obvious. I was trying to swallow but my mouth had gone dry. There was a huge knot in my stomach.

"Nothing really. I just think we should consider a separation, that's all!" It was a devastating blow to hear Kelly confirming my worst fears.

"Why?" I could hardly get the word out.

"Why? You're asking me why!" There was an incredulous tone to her voice.

I had my head in my hands. "No, Kelly, no! We don't have to separate. I love you, Kelly! You must know that I love you." I was desperately trying not to break down.

"You love me, Ben, do you? So why do you encourage me to fuck Carl all the time?" The emphasis on the word 'fuck' could not have been stronger. She was really putting the knife in. And then she twisted it! "But at least he does want to fuck me, and not just watch someone else doing it!"

Her remark was mortifying but it was no more than I deserved. I chose to ignore it. "Is it Carl? Are you in love with him?"

"I might have been, Ben. I was certainly very fond of him." There was a momentary wistful look and then her demeanour altered, as if she had made up her mind about something, which indeed, she had. "I'm sorry, Ben, I shouldn't have mentioned it tonight. I should have waited till the morning. But I don't want to discuss it any more tonight because I am absolutely shattered. I'm going to have a relaxing bath and then I'm going straight to bed!" Almost as if it was an afterthought, but in fact it was deliberate, she added, "on my own! I'll sleep in the spare room and I don't want to be disturbed. I want time to think." And with a cursory 'goodnight', she went upstairs.

I heard her running her bath. I should have gone upstairs to try to reason with her but I think I must have been in shock. I fetched myself a stiff drink, went into the study and sat down on the sofa. I just sat there, and stared at the wall in a daze for God knows how long. My fears had been justified then. God, what a stupid prat I'd been. How could this all have gone so wrong? Why did I let it happen? Kelly was everything I had ever wanted. Once she had been quite innocent, but I had corrupted her. Once she had been sexually content with me, but she could never be so again. She'd wanted us to separate and I would have to live without her. And then I found myself sobbing. I put my hands to my mouth so that Kelly wouldn't hear me.

I suddenly felt her hands on my head. I opened my eyes and Kelly was standing in front of me wearing a long white tee shirt. She'd had second thoughts whilst she was soaking in the bath and had decided we ought to talk things over that evening, rather than the following morning. She was crying too. We looked at each other. "Kelly", I said, "I'm sorry, I really am. I love you more than you can ever know. Please don't leave me." I couldn't say any more because of my tears. She pulled me towards her and my cheek was pressed against her soft rounded stomach. The salt was stinging my eyes and I wiped them with the end of her t-shirt. She had nothing on under it but that was the last thing on my mind.

"Ben," I heard her say, "How do you think I felt when you kept pushing me towards Carl, when you actually said you preferred me to have sex with him instead of you? And when I offered to come home with you for your meeting and you said I shouldn't bother?"

"I'd just assumed that you'd be enjoying yourself so much with him, you wouldn't really have wanted to come home."

"Of course, I enjoyed the physical side – what girl wouldn't? But it's not everything. I told you that in the car. I would happily have come home early with you, Ben, honestly."

"But you seemed so affectionate to him" I said.

"What are you saying, Ben? That it was okay for Carl and me to shag each other stupid, provided that at other times we only shook hands!" I had to smile at the patent absurdity of the idea. "Anyway, Ben, you have to understand. You can't have sex with someone all the time and not get emotionally involved. I thought I could but..." She paused, and made an effort to compose herself. "Look, I admit that I started it, but don't forget I was also the one who was prepared to end it. And you didn't just talk me out of it, Ben, you gave me the distinct impression that you wanted it to continue!" With that she sat down on the sofa.

"It was because it was a real life fantasy, Kelly. I knew we both enjoyed fantasies. I thought a real life one would be even better, that's all."

"Yes, I do enjoy fantasies, Ben, and do you know why? I'll tell you. It's because no one ever gets hurt in fantasies. No one feels degraded in fantasies. No one ever regrets what they've done. But reality is very different. In real life people do get hurt, people do have regrets."

I looked into her eyes. "I never ever meant to hurt you, Kelly."

"It's not just you, Ben.

"What are you trying to tell me?"

She took a deep breath. "I was infatuated by him, Ben. I might even have been in love with him for a while. But it's over between us and I'm never going to see him again." She dissolved in tears. I got up to fetch some tissues.

"Do you want to tell me about it, Kelly?"

She wiped her eyes before she answered me. "Do you remember what I told you when I came back from Paris, that there were times when I'd do anything Carl wanted. Well after you'd gone home, he told me wanted a video of us together. He said we were so good we should have a record of it. He also said that you might like it too. He assured me it would be private."

"Go on."

"So I agreed to it. What he didn't tell me was that he would get Jeff to make the video! When he turned up I was furious and ready to walk out. He pleaded with me to go through with it saying that someone had to operate the video camera, something to do with angles and zooming and other stuff I can't remember. He reminded me that Jeff had already seen me virtually naked anyway, and asked me why I should be so concerned. I know I shouldn't have agreed to it, but I did." She began to cry again.

I was totally unprepared for this and I wasn't very tactful. Fuck me, she didn't even like the man! "Kelly," I asked, "how could you have done it in front of Jeff? I presume we are talking about the same Jeff who, if my memory serves me correct, gives you the creeps?" She was now in floods of tears, sobbing her heart out. I pulled out some more tissues from the box and gave them to her. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose.

"Because I'm a tart, that's why! Carl thinks I am and from your question it is clear that you do too. Well at least the three of us can all agree about that!"

"Kelly, what are you talking about? I don't think you're a tart. The definition of a tart is a prostitute, or a promiscuous woman. Someone indulging in casual sex. Look it up for yourself. You went with Carl because you wanted to. There are probably thousands of women who would like to do what you did, but they're conditioned to think that if they were to do the same, they'd be tarts. I was just surprised, that's all."

"Well, Carl thinks I'm a tart. And how do I know? Because he promised me to Jeff, that's how. I flew off the handle at him, demanding to know what gave him the right to make such decisions about me. It was my body and I would decide whom I offered it to, not him. How dare he assume that I would consent to it? He asked me why I had suddenly become so coy and the implication was obvious. I told him he had made it perfectly clear what he really thought about me." She looked at me, her chest heaving in her anger.

"And then what happened?"

"He immediately apologised but I can't forgive him." She continued dabbing her eyes with a tissue.

I tried to change the subject. "What about the video, Kelly, where is it?"

"Oh I don't know, Ben. Carl's got it. What does it matter, anyway?"

She was right about the video. That didn't matter, but something else did, and it mattered very much indeed. "So it is over between the two of you?"