Bree's Journey Pt. 03

The warm, wet mouth was replaced by gentle caresses up and down my slit. At times they would dip inside my cunt for a few seconds before resuming the slow strokes that felt so comforting and arousing at the same time.

A palm closed around my neck, not enough to cut off my air supply. It steadied me, grounded me in a very relaxing way. A moment later, a wet tongue slid between my lips. My own tongue came alive in excited greeting, but the contact was brief. Just enough to let me know that I wasn't alone.

It wasn't the sort of alone that felt lonely. And maybe "alone" wasn't the right word. I mean, Kieran was certainly still there. I knew that. It was just that we were only connected by his touch, by the feelings he was making me experience. We weren't sharing thoughts with one another, or exchanging emotions. I couldn't see him, touch him, hear him. He was a faceless entity creating lovely music with my body.

The second orgasm caught me off guard. There was no build-up to it. It just sort of hit me out of nowhere. All of a sudden, my channel began convulsing, clamping down onto something inside. Fingers? I wasn't sure.

I'd lost track of what was happening down there. It felt like one endless stream of stimulation, followed by wave after wave of climax. They'd subside, then get stronger, then subside again.

I felt his cock pushing inside. It was impossibly large, causing my cunt to explode in an orgasm that was so intense, stars exploded before my eyes. Fingers dug into my buttocks like little daggers, lifting me off the mattress as he thrust his pelvis against mine in a punishing assault.

I'm not sure if I rolled from one climax to another, or if it was just the longest orgasm in history. It kept going, though, until his hips stilled and he lowered my buttocks back onto the bed.

A moment later, fingers toyed around my anus, then I felt them tugging at something. My tight hole expanded and stretched for a second, then the object was dislodged. I squirmed, afraid I'd evacuated my bowels on the bed. A hand pressed on my belly to settle me down and I realized that it must've been my imagination.

The volume of the music softened, then the ear buds were removed. I remember my ears ringing briefly from the loss of sound, then almost nothing after that. It was like the music had been the only thing keeping me from falling asleep. Now that it was off, I could relax into the warm cocoon of slumber that was closing in on me from all sides.

I woke up in Kieran's arms. I was on my side with him wrapped around me. It was dark in the room. Real dark. I stirred to look at the clock and Kieran lifted his head.

"Hey."

I tried to speak but my throat was parched. Sound came out as nothing more than a weak croak.

Kieran patted my hip. "I'll get you a glass of water."

I rolled onto my stomach and craned my neck to see the glowing red numbers of the digital clock face. 11:36. I pushed myself up to a sitting position to look again. I'd slept a long time.

Kieran shoved an open bottle of water at me. I took a sip, then tipped the bottle to gulp more freely. I could hear Kieran's bare feet shuffling to the master bathroom, then the thunderous waterfall sounds of him urinating. He hadn't bothered to shut the door, which I was beginning to recognize as a real trend with the men I'd been seeing lately. They were all way more comfortable with sharing their bathroom routine than I'd ever been.

I offered the remaining amount of water to Kieran when he returned. He gulped it down in two swallows and then set the bottle on the bedside table before climbing back onto the bed so he could wrap his warm, naked body around mine.

"How are you feeling? Are you hungry?"

I tried to assess my physical well being, eventually deciding that I definitely wasn't hungry. I shook my head. "Not hungry. You?"

"I ate something earlier. I didn't want to disturb you."

"Thanks."

"I have a lab in the morning. It's a once per week thing, so it's kind of long. If I skip it..."

"Don't skip it. I understand. Those kind of classes are hard to make-up."

Kieran huffed a sigh. "Yeah. I'm sorry."

"It's okay." I yawned and let my head drop backward against Kieran's shoulder.

We sat there like that for several silent minutes. I think I drifted in and out of sleep a few times before Kieran began to situate us back to a prone position. He kissed my neck, close to my ear. "Night, baby."

I nodded slightly before drifting off to sleep again.

The next time I woke, I was alone. Sunlight streamed through the blinds, announcing another beautiful spring day in Texas. Kieran had told me had a morning class, so I wasn't surprised that he was gone. Just lonely.

We hadn't gotten the chance to talk about anything. Not about that wretched Ashley, or his plans for dealing with Daniel, or even the intense sex we'd had the night before, which seemed more like a dream to me than reality.

I slipped out of bed to head to the bathroom. I felt heavy and sluggish. Like I could sleep for another eight hours and still not be rested. I realized that I was probably about to start my period. I didn't keep very good track of it since the pills I took made it almost too light to even bother with protection. Almost.

I went through my bathroom routine and got dressed. Then I ambled to the kitchen in search of coffee. Kieran's Keurig machine was poised with a coffee cup in position, just waiting for me to hit the button. I smiled at his thoughtfulness.

The machine came alive, grinding and hissing, eventually spewing coffee into the waiting mug. I lifted the steaming cup and stirred a spoonful of sugar into my coffee. A faint vibrating noise caught my attention as I was about to sit down. My eyes followed the sound to the cell phone on the countertop. It was Kieran's. He'd obviously forgotten his phone.

I checked the caller ID. It was Daniel. I lifted it up, but it went to voice mail before I could answer it, which was probably a good thing. I wasn't ready to accept Daniel's apology just yet.

About 30 seconds later, there was the telltale, short vibration, indicating a message.

I was at a crossroad and I knew it. Either I was going to mind my own business and ignore the message for Kieran, or I was going to be the nosy bitch girlfriend that every guy hates, and listen to Kieran's private message from my brother. I'd like to think I wasn't the type of girl to snoop. But that wasn't going to be the case this time. This was my brother, calling my boyfriend. It involved me.

That was the rationalization I used to violate Kieran's privacy. It worked pretty well because I had no trouble hitting the playback button.

Hey. I'm here if you can sneak away for an hour. That little taste in my bedroom Sunday night won't hold me for long, and Bryan is worked up over this whole thing with Bree, so you know he's useless. Anyway, we can make it quick, in the shower if you want. We've had some good times there. Let me know.

I set the phone down on the countertop before I dropped it. My mind was buzzing and my empty stomach churning. Sunday night?

I thought back to that night. Kieran and I had slept together. Even though I was a heavy sleeper, I knew I'd wake up to him getting out of bed. Wait! I remembered coming back with Bryan. Kieran and Daniel were in the master bedroom with the door shut. The mental image of Daniel's huge grin when they emerged flashed before my eyes.

Oh, god. No.

I gripped my belly. There wasn't enough food in there to threaten to come up, but I felt nauseous, just the same.

Kieran lied to me. He didn't even try to end it with Daniel. He's just waiting until I head out of town to resume things with him. And probably with Ashley, too.

All my fears and insecurities came crashing down at once. Daniel. Ashley. Casual acquaintances at the club where he worked. They all had a piece of Kieran. I'd never be enough for him. It was Lance all over again.

The walls of the apartment quickly closed in on me. I felt dizzy and trapped at the same time. I needed air. Definitely more room to breathe.

I clutched at the tee shirt that was smothering me, but pulling it from my body didn't help. It felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest. I scrambled to the bedroom and grabbed my suitcase and purse. My mind was spinning too fast to reason through my actions. I needed space. If I could just breathe again, everything would be okay. I'd be able to think, then. Work out how I was going to deal with all this. I needed to get out, get away.

I told myself that I was just going somewhere to think, but when my car turned onto the on-ramp of the highway toward Dallas, I had a sinking suspicion I wouldn't have the guts to stop until I reached home.

***

Kieran

I walked to advanced chem lab, not realizing I didn't have my phone until I tried texting Bree to let her know I was on my way back. I didn't think much about it. I was just anxious to get back to the apartment so I could see her. I hated that she was still sleeping when I left. Our amazing night must've really wiped her out.

I couldn't believe how good sex was with us. It made every other experience pale in comparison. I could easily spend the rest of my life with her, forsaking all others, and all that crap you've heard a hundred times in wedding vows. I thought all that was bullshit. That anyone who would make that promise must be either desperate, or stupid. That was before I met Bree.

She made it easy for me to settle down. I didn't want anyone else. I couldn't even see myself with another person after being with her. She was everything I'd ever wanted in a woman. I loved her. That didn't even seem like a strong enough word. I adored her. I was obsessed with her.

I took the stairs two at a time, then strode to my door. It was unlocked, which surprised me a little. I'd locked it when I left, but she probably needed to go out to her car for something.

"Hey, babe. I'm back."

I noticed my mobile phone on the counter as I moved into the bedroom.

"Bree...?"

I ducked my head into the bathroom and then scanned the bedroom. A tee shirt of hers hung over the chair, but her suitcase was gone. I turned and walked into the bathroom. Her toothbrush was there, along with her deodorant, her hairbrush, and some hair ties.

I couldn't make sense of it. Where was her suitcase? She obviously hadn't packed all her things.

I walked back to the kitchen for clues. A mostly full coffee mug was sitting next to my phone. Shit. I got the sinking suspicion that my phone had something to do with all this. I picked it up and checked for missed calls.

I'd missed one call from Daniel, but there was no message. Or, wait... There were no unheard messages, but the last voice message was from when Daniel called.

I put the receiver to my ear and listened to his voice message. I didn't get past the second sentence before knowing in my gut that she'd gone. She'd heard Daniel's message and gotten the wrong idea. Or maybe it'd been a partially accurate idea, but not one that I wanted her to have.

I lifted my phone to call her, but then realized that I didn't have her number. I hadn't needed it before now. I would've realized that little fact when I tried to text her earlier, if I'd remembered my phone.

God, what an idiot I am. A complete, fucking moron.

I still had one way to get her number. I considered calling Daniel and asking for it. But playing that out in my mind, knowing how agitated I already was, I was certain it would end up in a fight. And no phone number. I pocketed my cell phone and headed out the door for Daniel's house.

He greeted me at the door, which was somewhat odd. I hadn't called him to let him know I was coming over.

"You got my message. Good."

I froze. My stomach dropped at the realization. Of course, he'd assume I was there to have sex. He'd called, and when that happened, I usually responded by coming over.

"What's wrong?"

"Bree got your message."

"Bree? How? What was she doing with your phone?"

"I took off without it this morning."

"So that gives her the right to listen to your messages?"

I shook my head. I didn't want to go into that with him. It wasn't important. What was important was that Bree was gone because of what he'd said. "She's gone, Daniel. I need her number so I can call her."

Daniel shrugged. "If that's what you want...but I wouldn't date someone who goes through my messages."

"Give me the number." I was losing patience with him.

He held out her contact information for me to read as I punched the numbers into my phone. I hurriedly memorized her address while I was at it. I might need to pay her a visit.

It went straight to voicemail, meaning she'd turned off her phone. I wanted to take her over my knee for driving with her phone off. Regardless of what had happened, or how much she wanted to avoid talking to me, this was a safety issue. She needed to take care of herself because I wasn't always going to be around...

I stopped my train of thought. Even with her gone, I couldn't grasp that it was over. We couldn't be finished. I wasn't going to let that happen.

I locked my phone and shoved it into my pocket. "Her phone is off."

"I warned you this would happen. Didn't I tell you..."

"Shut up, Daniel. I mean it. I don't want to hear one bad word about her. Not from anyone, but especially not from you. Her brother.

"What exactly is it you have against her, anyway? She told me how you didn't stick up for her in high school. What's that all about?"

Daniel reeled back as if I'd slapped him in the face. "High school? You mean all that shit with Lance?"

I nodded.

"Shit. I don't know. What the hell was I supposed to do?"

"Take care of her, for one thing. Tell her that it wasn't her fault instead of letting her go on thinking that she was the one to blame for that guy being gay. She's had to live with that for years."

"I never said it was her fault. I don't remember even thinking that. Is that what she said?"

"She said you never consoled her. Never said anything to her about it."

"I was as fucking shocked as everyone else. Fuck, Kieran. She and Lance were practically engaged. And then, all of a sudden, the whole school was talking about gays. Who was gay, who wasn't...It was a witch hunt after that. I was scared shitless that someone was going to point a finger at me and Bryan. We were right there...just outside the Lance and Bree spotlight."

I hadn't thought of the aftermath and how it probably affected Daniel. Bree had mentioned that it was hard on her family, but I think she was mostly referring to her mother.

"Bree has never needed me. She doesn't need anyone. You've been around her. You know what I'm talking about."

"I don't see Bree the same way that you do. She's a strong woman, no doubt. But she still needs to be taken care of."

Daniel slumped down onto the sofa. He looked defeated and confused.

"I want to be that man for her. I want to take care of her even when she acts like she doesn't want it. This is it for me. My only hope of a happy life is with that girl. Your sister."

"Aren't you the drama queen."

"I don't care what the fuck you want to call me. I just want Bree. That's all. No more Thursday morning sexcapades, no ex-girlfriends showing up on my doorstep."

"Sexcapades?"

"And my stripping days are over."

"You quit?"

"Yep. I called my boss yesterday. And not because Bree asked me to. She was going to go with me tonight. But I didn't want our last night together to be spent at a gay bar. I wanted it to be just us."

"You've always been such a goddamn romantic, you know that?"

"Yeah. I do. You're not that different, you just try harder to hide it. Bryan has told me some of the little things you do for him. So, don't try and throw that caveman act at me, Daniel Weaver. I ain't buyin' it."

"You really mean it? This is it with us?"

I nodded. "I can't do that to her. You shouldn't be able to do it to her, either. She's your sister, for god's sake."

"I know. It's just ..."

"It's routine, I get it. But it wasn't going to last forever."

Daniel nodded and sighed. "I'm not a total asshole. I never meant to hurt Bree. And I had no idea that she'd listen to that message. I just..."

"You were horny, I know. It's not totally your fault that she's gone. Ashley dropped by yesterday to inform me that she was ready to get back together."

"She said that?"

"Not in so many words, but almost."

"Was Bree there?"

I nodded.

"Fuck!"

"It sucked. I didn't handle it as well as I should've, probably. Looking back on it, I should've told Ashley to go fuck herself right then."

"Why didn't you?"

"I was just shell shocked, I guess. I never expected..."

"What are you going to do? At one time, you turned basket case over that bitch."

"I know. I freaked out when she left. But I'll be ten times worse if Bree doesn't take me back. So, if you're asking me who I pick, there is absolutely no question in my mind."

"What are you gonna do?"

"I'm going to keep calling her. If I can't reach her by phone, I'll show up on her doorstep."

"You'd go that far?"

"Yeah. Wouldn't you go that far for Bryan?"

"Yeah."

"There you have it."

Daniel and I both had afternoon classes. I'd planned to skip mine, but now that Bree was gone, there was no reason for me to skip. I knew I'd just sit around and pine for her. It was going to be a long week if she didn't answer her phone.

***

Bree

Three days after I left Austin, I still didn't have things figured out.

Kieran had called at least a dozen times, and had left four messages. I wanted to talk to him, but each time I saw his number on caller ID, I chickened out.

The thing was, I needed a friend. One who would understand what I was going through, and why I'd panicked so badly. I only had one friend who knew me well enough to get it. Who would give me advice that was good for me, not just say what they thought I wanted to hear. But I wasn't sure how that would work out when that friend was also the subject of my angst.

On top of all that, I lost my job. It actually felt like a trivial thing next to all that had happened with Kieran. I saw it coming. The company cut over 50% of its workforce. They were months from filing bankruptcy, and everyone knew it.

The truth of it was that it freed me. Since the last reorganization, I'd not been doing what I wanted, anyway. And the paths toward that goal were dwindling within the company. I just didn't want to face that fact. They did me a favor by cutting me loose. I might not feel the same way in a month, when the bills started piling up, but for now, I was relieved.

I finished bringing in the boxes of crap I'd collected in my work cubicle during my tenure at that company. Sitting on my dining room table, the trinkets perched atop the notebooks looked cheap and worthless. Mild amusements to occupy my hands while on corporate conference calls that droned on and on. No more of those.

I lifted my phone and scrolled to one of Kieran's messages. I just wanted to hear his voice again. I wanted more than that, but I'd screwed things up pretty well by leaving. And his phone calls were dwindling. He hasn't called at all today. I knew I'd probably missed my window to fix things with him.

I looked down at the voice mails he'd left me with my finger hovering over the edit button. I needed to stop torturing myself by listening to his messages. I should delete them and try to move past this bad decision. Try and like myself again.

I set the phone down on the table. Tomorrow. I'll move on then.

It felt strange being home during a workday. The house was brighter than normal, making it feel more like a Saturday or Sunday. But when I started surfing television channels, it was apparent that it was definitely not a weekend day. The choices were depressing. Cooking shows, daytime dramas, or talk shows. Since I didn't cook, and had enough drama in my life, already, I had to settle for a talk show.