Passion of Erika Christensen Ch. 05

"You don't have to apologize," Erika told her, sighing again. "I was born into this church. I know what some people in it are."

All my life, she thought, they've tried to control me and make me like them. Never have they succeeded. That is in part thanks to my learning too well their creed of self-determination and self-acceptance and in larger part thanks to my friends.

"I'm doing this as a favor to Tom," she said, turning back to Doug. "I don't know if I can really do anything and I guess I don't care. Nevertheless I'm going to try."

Doug nodded and gave her a proud smile. "I will help you. Check out those files. They're pretty interesting. Everyone, remember, though — the information does not leave this room."

Erika looked through Tom's file first. It was as comprehensive as she feared it would be. There was great discussion of his past wives, Mimi Rogers and Nicole Kidman, and many of his girlfriends also. No mention of a gay relationship, Erika noted. I guess there really is no truth to that rumor. However, the file does say Tom and Nicole used to swing with John Travolta and his wife Kelly. I didn't know that. Tom also has erectile dysfunction. That doesn't surprise me. She skimmed the file one last time and then passed it to a curious Scarlett and Ryan. Thanks to Tom's publicity and Erika's acquaintance with him there wasn't much in the file she didn't already know.

Katie's file was thinner but far more interesting. Most of it was "yes" or "no" responses to questions she had answered without giving further information. She claims to have had both male and female lovers, Erika noted. Never does she say who or how many, though. I know all too well how probing the questionnaires that lead to these files can be, so Katie must be a more determined person than I thought. She beamed in surprise and then handed the file to Keri, who was giving her an odd look.

"You'd never catch me submitting to one of those files," Shane declared. "Who do these people think they are, shrinks?"

"Hey, religious ministers have been counseling people since long before psychology existed as a profession," said Ryan. "Scientologists are just newer and better about writing stuff down." He chuckled. "Still, though, I don't think I'd ever want them probing me either." Scarlett's husband looked at Erika. "Present company excluded."

"Thanks," Erika said. She gave Ryan a grin and then looked at Doug. "Is there anyone we can call who knows Katie? Her family? A former boyfriend?"

"I'll check my contacts," Doug answered. He again looked around the room at everyone. "Can we count on all of you?"

Alicia coughed. "I'm not getting involved in this. I have too many failed relationships to ever be a good marriage counselor. If you want my advice, though, Erika, it's yours."

"Thanks," Erika said. Besides Doug, Alicia was her smartest friend. Erika was sure that the redhead would have good ideas on how to help Katie and Tom if she would just put her personal disappointments aside.

"Ryan and I can't stay," said Scarlett. "We have that premiere in Rome this weekend. Our plane leaves tonight and we won't be back until Friday. Sorry, Erika."

"Yeah, we're really sorry," Ryan chimed in. "I think we would enjoy getting further involved in this."

Erika smiled in understanding. She knew she had their emotional support if not their presence. She glanced towards Shane and Keri.

Keri opened her mouth to speak first but Shane interrupted her. "I'm not getting involved in this, period!" he shouted. "As far as I'm concerned, people like Tom Cruise deserve whatever messes they put in their lives. They join a stupid alien cult that charges them thousands of dollars to break up their families and fill their heads with bullshit. Then they expect other people to listen to their crap and follow them. If they try to leave, they get harassed and blackmailed. If they say anything about what they suffer, things get worse. The cult of Scientology hurts people, inside it and outside it. We should just let them all rot."

"Shane!" Keri shouted, grabbing her husband's arm. Shane immediately shut his mouth and looked at her. "Think about what you're saying," Keri said in a careful serious voice. "Does every Scientologist you know support that image? There's one in this room who doesn't. She lets you call her 'lovely'."

Yeah, Shane, Erika thought, her face red with fury. Only years of training in how to manage her temper was keeping her from blowing her stack.

That and I know why he feels the way he does, Erika told herself. I've seen all the websites out there that denounce my religion. I know about the awful things some of our leaders have done and compelled others to do. I hate that those things have happened and continue to occur, but the assumptions people get about them sting even worse. Why do people have to assume all Scientologists are involved in bad stuff? Why do they think we're all the same? Why do they think we can't learn from our mistakes? Every religion has a dark side that its followers have to move past if they want to be good people. We're no exception and we too could probably fix ourselves the way the others are doing if we were only given the chance.

Shane looked at her as Keri glared at him. "Erika, I'm sorry," he said, repentant. "I know you're not part of the problem. You're a good friend to Keri and me. You always have been. I apologize."

Erika took a moment before responding. Everyone else in the room was too startled or angry to fill the void. "Thank you, Shane," Erika said when she found the right words. "You reminded me why Tom and people like him annoy the fuck out of me. It says in our church creed we're supposed to refrain from prejudice and respect others' right to freedom of thought. 'No authority less than God' can revoke that right. The high officials of Scientology have placed themselves above it, though, and Tom is their voluntary shill. I refuse to be the same."

Shane raised his eyebrows. "You really feel that way? Then why do you stay with them?"

"Because," Erika said with a shrug, "I'm not like them and I want to remind them of that. Scientology doesn't have to be about putting yourself ahead of others or harming others. The way I practice it, it's not. If I don't show the fanatics a better way to be than the way that has led to rants like the one you just gave, I can't ever expect them to grow past their negative qualities. My family and thousands of other people in my church, including many of the ministers, feel the same way as I do. We're not always allowed to act on our feelings but when we can, we do. You may not think people pay attention to us but they do, and sometimes they follow our example. We're not as stupid as some people think we are."

"I know," Shane said. "You're living proof of that. It's just ..." He looked away. "I think I'll shut up before I hang myself again."

"Yeah," Keri said with a chuckle. "That sounds like a great idea, dear."

Shane's wife crossed her arms. "I apologize for my husband, Erika. If you need my help on this, you have it. The way I see things, Tom has a lot of influence in your religion and in the world. This is an opportunity for you to help him change his life for the better, and Katie's also. I've seen how they are together. If you can help them, I say Godspeed."

"Thank you," Erika said, eased by Keri's words.

"No problem. I just wish there were more people in Scientology like you and not like those who give it a bad name." Keri looked back at her spouse.

Shane returned her grimace. "I'm sorry," he repeated. "If you want to help them, fine. If you think there's something I can do, just ask me."

"Okay," Erika said. "For now you've done enough." She turned away from him and looked at the black man standing beside Doug, the one person in the room who had so far remained quiet. "What about you, Clarke?" she asked. "Do you have any thoughts on this?"

Inside Out's security chief smiled. "Actually I do, Erika," he said. "I have something of a history with your people. I'm originally from South Africa. Until about twenty years ago, stupid racists dominated the government of that country. The whites in charge denied people with my skin color education, health care and all sorts of other things because they wanted us to be a laboring class and nothing else. The government called this scheme 'apartheid' and it lasted centuries."

"I'm familiar with that system," Erika said, startled. She had learned about apartheid in school growing up but had not known of Clarke's past involvement with it until now.

"In the 1970s," Clarke said, "about twenty years before the South African government ended their program of segregation, some people within your church began opposing it. They took in poor families, no matter their skin color, and gave them schooling and jobs. My parents and I were among those families. Followers of your church helped my people, Erika, and some never charged a dime for it either. When my parents decided to leave your church, they did so in peace. I went with them. I never really fit in with Scientology and I didn't want to stay. I'm sorry I never told you before."

"This story is BS!" Shane interrupted. "Ron Hubbard was a racist. It's well-documented."

"I wouldn't know about that guy," Clarke replied. "I never met him. His disciples who assisted my family weren't racists. That was for sure."

Taking a breath, the Bushman bouncer looked at Shane. "You may be aware from those websites you've read that Erika's church didn't speak against apartheid in public until after it was already struck down. That's because they were afraid. The South African government had come close to outlawing them once and then they didn't. The church didn't want to risk upsetting the government with open challenge. They didn't want bad public relations with rich whites either. Therefore, all the things Scientology did to oppose apartheid before it was over were in the shadows and behind the scenes. I know about them because I was a victim they helped. I have sent my story to a hundred websites and not one has accepted it. 'Conflicts with the church's true image' is the reason I usually get. Other people say I'm a liar. What do you think?"

Shane said nothing.

Clarke smirked. "Only after the South African government came to see how terrible racism is did Erika's church dare to openly act out. They gathered data on some of apartheid's worst abuses and made it public. The resulting political activism led to numerous reforms in South Africa's mental health care system. Scientologists continue to work in my nation today to further education and human rights and to combat discrimination and illegal drug use."

He directly faced Erika. "As a citizen of South Africa, I figure I owe your church something for that. I don't think I should wait until they learn to fix more of their problems to help them either. Erika, if you want my aid in assisting Tom and Katie, you can count on me."

"Thank you, Clarke," Doug said. He smiled at the many surprised looks in the room.

"Yes," Erika agreed. "Thank you."

Why is it, she asked herself, that so few people remember that my faith, like all good religions, is trying to make the world a better place for all mankind? Yes, we're human, so we don't always succeed. Yes, we have bad people within our ranks. But there are good people too and they do good things. Why does everyone seem to notice what the bad people do more than that?

The others in the room continued talking while these thoughts ran through Erika's head. Doug took charge and laid out several plans.

"Many critics compare the Church of Scientology to the Nazi Party of the Second World War," he told Shane. "Are you aware that many people in the Nazi Party hated Hitler and the war and wanted to get out from under them? Some tried. There were multiple plots within Germany to overthrow Hitler's dictatorship before the war ended. Most of these were supported by us."

"Last month Tom Cruise did a movie about one," Shane recollected. "Your point?"

"There are people in Scientology who feel the same way as those people in the Nazi Party. They hate and fear their church leaders for all the reasons you know. The trouble is, many of them are afraid to leave or they actually see good things in their religion and want to keep following it. They're like Martin Luther and other Christians who historically rebelled against the medieval Catholic Church. You know about that?"

Shane nodded and Doug went on. "Our society assists these people. The ones who want to get out and who can, we help. Those who want to stay in and keep their own conscience, like Erika, we also aid. The Church of Scientology is a religion, not a government. It requires far more tact to handle than the Nazi Party did. We've also learned from our mistakes with the Nazis and our successes with the Russian Soviets and the South Africans. What we're doing to fix Scientology and help its followers may take a long time, but I hope it will succeed. We've already made some strides and intend to continue."

Shane looked at his wife. "Did you know about this?"

"Yes," said Keri. "I was figuring out a way to tell you. I was like you when I first met Erika. I only knew the negative image of her and I wouldn't allow myself to be proactive. Sometimes discriminating critics have to be helped more than troubled Scientologists have to be. Ignorance is never a good thing."

Shane frowned, seeing the expression in her eyes. "Look, I said I was sorry, okay?"

The others in the room shook their heads at him and turned away. "Clarke, I'm putting you on another special assignment," Doug told his security chief. "You're tasked with Katie's security. Find Frank Martin. You two will pick Katie up at the airport." Frank Martin was a London cabbie well known for his professional discretion. Doug often employed him as a transporter for customers who needed special care.

"You got it, Deputy Doug," Clarke said.

Doug turned back to Erika. "Whatever resources Inside Out has are at your disposal. I'll have a suite cleaned and prepared for your talks with Katie when she arrives."

"Just a meeting room," Erika told him. "I won't be getting that close to her. Tom insisted on that."

"Very well." Doug's voice was disappointed. "Keri, can you make one of your pies in the kitchen?"

"Sure," Keri replied. "Good luck, Erika." The other people in the room expressed similar wishes.

"Thanks," Erika addressed all of them. "I still don't really know this girl. I may need it."

***

Two Days Later.

"Yes!" Katie Holmes whispered. "Yes! Oh god!"

She shut her lips, remembering her surroundings. Katie was in an airplane bathroom and even though she wasn't sure anyone on the plane had recognized her she didn't want to be noticed. I won't worry about it, she told herself after no one answered her cries. I'm alone for the first time in a long while. I'm going to enjoy myself. Twitching her body and leaning against the wall of the plane, she pushed the pink eight-inch vibrator deeper into her shaven cunt.

Shaking her shoulder length dark hair, Katie tensed her tanned svelte body. Her body was built up from the three to four mile runs she completed several times a week. These times were often when Katie did her best thinking. Her flight had been long and after sleeping and reading through most of it, Katie felt the need to think hard about her situation. It was not advisable to jog while on board a plane, though. Sexual exertion in the bathroom was the next best thing.

Katie squeezed her small breasts through her violet blouse and turned her vibrator to a higher setting. She had thought getting the toy onto the plane would be difficult. An airport security officer spotted it in her purse but let Katie go with little more than a knowing look after getting her autograph. Now Katie was using the toy for the first time during the flight. She had dropped her jeans and panties to her ankles, parted her long slim legs, and shoved the pink cylinder deep within her pussy. Her tan skin was flushed with excitement and her brown eyes were open wide. Moving the vibrator back and forth, she hunched her hips and moaned.

My publicity handlers would kill me if they knew if I was doing this, Katie thought, chuckling to herself. Tom would be shocked too. Oh well, he can't always do it for me and when he can't I use Pinky.

"Narf!" she hissed to herself, imagining the vibrator speaking to her as one of her favorite animated characters. "Poit! Zort!" She thrust the toy against her recessed clit.

Katie was on the plane at her husband's request. She was aware of how people saw her relationship with Tom Cruise but she treasured it. He had been one of her greatest childhood crushes and getting to date him was a dream come true. He never spurned on romance, running and lying with her on Italian beaches and proposing to her atop the Eiffel Tower. He had given Katie hope after her previous boyfriends outgrew her and she them. Most important, he gave Katie a beautiful daughter and two other kids to whom she was happy to be a cool stepmom. Tom was handsome, attentive and a gentle caring lover. Katie appreciated it all.

I know he also has another side, though, Katie thought as she gasped and sat down on the room's closed toilet. Tom has been isolated all his life, even when he's in a crowd of people. His father abandoned him when he was growing up and ever since, he's been looking for new things to lead him. These have included movie producers, girlfriends, and controversial religions. The conflict within Tom makes him want to control everything in his life and I don't think he will ever escape that. It has all kinds of consequences. I've seen them firsthand and gotten hurt.

Despite all this, Katie reflected further, I still want to preserve our relationship. My father and brother are both divorce attorneys. Growing up, I met their clients. I don't want my daughter turning out like some of the children. I don't want to end up like some of the women either, although I will if it becomes clear that's the way it has to be. Tom gave me a lucrative prenuptial agreement, so I know he understands.

In return, Katie understood that she had to make certain sacrifices to be with him. She had to give up the friends Tom didn't like, most of her free time and a few of her dreams. Would I have achieved those hopes anyway? Katie sometimes questioned. My show was over before I met Tom and my movie career was a string of critical bombs. The fans loved me but would I have found success again? I don't know. I got my spouse and our family, though. That will suffice.

Again squeezing her taut breasts, Katie let out a moan. Pinky the vibrator and her body's sensations were sparking the thoughts in her mind she'd hoped they would. Clenching her jaw, she shook her body and knocked her head against the wall. Juice was leaking out of her pussy in a steady stream, coating Pinky and her hand.

"Troz!" Katie hissed. She turned up the toy's intensity.

Ever since Tom had presented the ticket to her yesterday morning, all through the flight, Katie had pondered whether she was doing the right thing. She had protested at first. She did not want to get onto a plane without her husband after they had concluded a trial separation and fly halfway around the world to see a counselor Tom refused to see himself. In the end, though, Katie gave in. She wanted to restore happiness to their relationship and felt she had no choice but to do as advised. Tom had told Katie little about the counselor, only that she was a woman and "someone different".

She'd better be, Katie thought. I can't take any more people who think they can tell us how to live our lives. Especially not people like that woman he installed as my publicity adviser after we started dating, who manipulated my insecurities whenever we spoke. I thank God every day that Jessica's gone.